


The Crown Of Love

by QueenHailey



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Humor, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Awkward Alistair, Awkward Cullen, Awkward Flirting, Awkward Romance, Blindfolds, Blood Mages, Blood Magic, Canon Relationships, Confident Cullen Rutherford, Consensual Kink, Cullen Smut, Custom Trevelyan, Cute, Dragon Age Kink Meme, Dragon Age Lore, Dream Sex, Dreams, Dreams and Nightmares, Dysfunctional Family, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Sex, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, Family Drama, Family Issues, Family Secrets, Fantasy, Female Character In Command, Filthy, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Grey Wardens, Helpful Cole (Dragon Age), Humor, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Implied/Referenced Torture, Inquisition Agents (Dragon Age), JUST KISS ALREADY, Jealous Cullen, Jealousy, King Alistair, Kink Meme, Kinky, Love, Love Letters, Lyrium Addiction, Lyrium Withdrawal, M/M, Mages, Mages and Templars, Mages vs. Templars, Minor Iron Bull/Dorian Pavus, Multi, Non-Canon Relationship, Off-World, Oral Sex, Original Character(s), POV Cullen Rutherford, POV Inquisitor, Red Lyrium, Red Templars, Rejection, Relationship(s), Revenge, Romance, Romantic Fluff, Rules, Secrets, Sexual Content, Sexual Fantasy, Sexual Tension, Sexual Violence, Shameless Smut, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut, Smutty, Star-crossed, Teasing, The Chantry, Triggers, True Love's Kiss, Undefined Female Inquisitor (Dragon Age), Unrequited Love, Wet Dream, Work In Progress, comeonnnn, long draw, lots of jealousy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-22
Updated: 2016-09-18
Packaged: 2018-04-05 13:39:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 48
Words: 51,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4181895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenHailey/pseuds/QueenHailey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Star crossed lovers or happily ever after?<br/>The story of Dragon Age: Inquisition with a flair for the dramatic in telling Ellanora Trevelyan and Cullen Rutherford's romantic, dorky, slow burn. Mix in some extra relationships, jealousy and some smut and there ya have it.</p><p>I definitely go off script, throw in some new relationships and twist the canon to suit my story. The fundamentals are the same but the drama... oh the drama! Shown by both Ella and Cullen's POV and Dorian's as well down the line. Oh, did I mention smut? haha</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Frostbite

**Author's Note:**

> I look forward to constructive criticism or any suggestions on direction or improvements to be made. I've been reading fan fiction on these two characters and I've really enjoyed the different angles and perspective people have created, I just wanted to let out mine :) 
> 
> Comments are honestly so helpful and appreciated :)
> 
> We begin, in Haven.

She had survived Haven. How, he did not know. She had dropped to her knees into the snow when he saw her. He was overwhelmed at the sight of her. He ran to her, lifted her into his arms, keeping her close to him, as close as she could possibly be. He begged her under his breath to live, to stay strong, he couldn't lose her now. The moment he whispered it he truly felt it. Every feeling he had been ignoring was now so raw and obvious in front of him. Setting her down on the bed and watching her eyes rolling in the back of her head as she twitched, frozen and blue.. His heart was weeping at the sight. She was a vision of snow, her long blonde hair, her pale skin, and the frozen temperature her body maintained. His companions around him, her friends, their team, all horrified at this situation. The Herald, their leader, their friend, shaking and weak, frostbite seeping from finger to finger. Cassandra was the first to break the heart wrenching fearful silence.

 Solas - start a fire, now! Dorian get the healers to make an elf root potion. Leliana help me with her clothes."p>

 The two women took no time to consider who was in the room and ripped her frozen tunic and light armour off her until she was left wearing her breast band and thin breeches. In that moment Cullen wished he had been more successful at convincing the Herald to wear heavier armour. Under her light tunic were welts, cuts along her arms and stomach, bruises everywhere. He knew it was selfish to allow the sight of her injuries to cause him pain but he couldn't help it. Here was the Herald of Andraste allegedly sent from the Divine, laying before them covered in bruises on top of old unhealed bruises, cuts from knives or edges of shields. She looked so small to him. Cassandra and Leliana began to carefully wrap her lower body in blankets, not wanting to touch any bruising and inflict anymore discomfort. Varric took her boots off and busied himself by wrapping her feet in warm wool. It was obvious she had broken ribs, and a shard of red lyrium had torn up her side. Cassandra and Cullen shared a look immediately at the sight of the shard. Before she could speak he turned on his heel to fetch a healer directly, to remove it, stop any bleeding and stitch the wound. 

Upon entrance of the healer's tent he could see Adan working over his herbs and botanicals with Dorian. Pointing to their most senior healer, "You! Come with me, please. Quickly!" Cullen lead the mage to the infirmary and stepped back to allow him the room he needed to access Ellanora. Cullen couldn't watch as the mage attempted, with Solas, to pull the shard of lyrium out of her, all the while he heard it singing into his mind, egging him on. He turned his head away in the same moment it was removed and her blood began to pour strong onto the bed. Cassandra wrapped the red lyrium in a discarded cloth. "Cullen, leave us." He nodded, grateful that his friend understood his current condition of withdrawl. He couldn't believe he had to leave the woman he adored while her life's blood seeped out of her onto the healer's hands, robes, and onto the floor. He pushed himself to leave the tent.

Cassandra exited soon after clutching the cloth, no doubt to discard it's contents far from their camp. Taking in a deep breath of cold winter air, he decided to hunt down additional blankets, more firewood, and a tub of water for Solas or Dorian to warm for her. He needed these tasks to busy himself, to keep him calm while the woman he loves lies opened, trembling and passing in and out of awareness. Cassandra and Cullen shared a nod as they entered the tent again. Cullen's hands were full of requisitions, Cassandra's appropriately empty. Ellanora had been stitched up, the wound was being wrapped. Taking in the scene in the tent, everyone tense, on edge, including the healer. Cullen could only hope that their efforts were enough, that she was strong enough.

 As if reading his thoughts Cassandra addressed the lot, "She will survive.. She.. She must." Leliana reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. The Seeker flinched at the sentiment. Dorian returned with potions and Cullen helped him get most of the mixture down the Heralds throat, encouraging her to swallow by rubbing her throat softly. She coughed rejecting the liquid and her head sank into her pillow and her mind slipped into unconsciousness. A silence took over the tent, and it lingered that entire night.

 


	2. It Begins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smutty smut smut smut.

She dreams of him..

Of his arms around her holding her to his chest, carrying her to a feeling only described as safe. Her head resting against his fur armour, tickling her cheek softly. But in this dream he doesn't lead her to a makeshift infirmary tent as she remembers he has through her slips in and out of consciousness. This time he carries her a cabin, isolated in the woods. This time it is spring; elfroot and embrium lush and full in every direction. He opens the door and steps inside. She can smell a sweet lavender odour and perhaps - vanilla? Vanilla, she decides. The cabin is quaint and warm. The glow of the fire cascading across the room creating a new feeling. A comfort.. Is this what home feels like?

She doesn't have much time to decide, as he sets her down gently on a bed, white soft linen under her. He brushes her hair off her forehead and she can see him now - truly see him. Eyes staring down to her full of desire and love. She gasps almost silently. Taken aback by her increased heart rate and butterflies in her stomach at the sight of such a beautiful man. He props her chin up slightly with his left hand, his right supporting his weight over her. He brings his lips to hers and devours her nervousness. Captures her surprise. Setting the butterflies astir again. "I love you Ellanora. You are... I've never felt anything like this before.." She can feel her heart swell with emotion as she sits up, putting her arms around his neck, pulling him to her. He takes her lead and moves his hands to her waist as he kisses her with fervour. She can feel a warmth in her stomach she's familiar with. She needs him.

She begins to pull at the straps of his armour, not to much avail. They both laugh at her pathetic and demanding effort. He sits up and helps remove it until he is in a thin white cotton that leaves little to the imagination. His sharp lines, his muscular curves, the small cluster of blonde chest hair slightly visible from the top of his shirt. She takes this all in, revels in it. She's biting her lower lip and she realizes in the same instant that he's looking at her lips, and his eyes are moving down.. She feels hot watching his eyes survey her body. His fingers busy with the buttons of her tunic, and he seems annoyed at their existence. He looks at her questioningly and she answers with a nod. He rips her tunic fresh off her in one good pull, buttons hitting the wood floor and a gasp leaving her mouth. He smiles down to her, enjoying the view of her exposed chest while his hand finds her right breast, her heart beating hard against his touch.

He trails kisses from her chin, down her throat to that sensitive spot on her neck - how did he know? Working his way down slowly as not to miss anything, his lips tread down to her breasts. She doesn't think she can contain herself anymore and wants to ask, to beg, to scream for him. Her desire is strong but her curiosity of what he has planned calms her ferocity. He nips at her, leaving little love bites down her ribs to her belly button and she can't handle it now, lowering her hips and moving her legs to welcome his entrance. "First, you.. Then, us." He says with a soft smirk. He removes her thin breeches and small clothes promptly which excites her even more. He kisses her again on the side of her stomach, trailing down further to take her with his tongue. She's impressed with his confidence and tenderness. He kisses her inner thighs and breathes a hot breath on her cunt, teasing her. Her hips are already bucking at the anticipation. Once he's decided she's waited long enough he starts by slowly licking her clit, while his fingers play delicately with her entrance. Her hands make it into his hair and she thinks she might die if he keeps this up. She stands corrected when he plunges two fingers into her and plants his thumb on her clit. He lifts his head to watch her react and that above all sets her off. She moves her hips with his rhythm and is gasping for air, digging her hands into the linen below her. He moves faster within her and increases the pressure on her clit and as if sensing her closeness, he pulls up and kisses her passionately. The pleasure is coming in waves and she thinks any one of them will be her breaking point. She comes slowly, at the cusp of the wave and then it's crashing against her. His fingers in her, his tongue entwined with hers, she yells his name into their kiss. He slows his movements as she revels in the aftershock. He's smiling at her and she's counting stars.

He takes her by the hand and pulls her up until she's standing in front of the bed, although her legs want to give out at any second. He sits on the edge of the bed and draws her to him. She straddles him and kisses his neck, feeling his stubble graze her cheek. She wants so badly to please him, now it's her turn to make him weak in the knees. She lowers herself down to him and uses her hand to guide him while his hands sit above her waist on her back. They both shudder at the tightness, at the warmth, at the way they just..fit. He closes his eyes and relaxes his head back, she draws her hands to his neck and begins to find her rhythm. At first slow, leisurely, he stares at her adoringly.

There is no doubt there is love here, between them, warming them and creating an intense trust and intimacy neither of them have understood before. Her speed picks up as he kisses her neck assertively, showing her how much he's wanted this, how much he is _loving_ this. She's feeling the pressure building up again and is riding him faster, harder while he caresses her breasts, knowing she's about to come again. She's chasing it down, getting closer and closer when he plants his feet firm into the floor and lifts her up from her bottom and begins to control the depth and speed so she can just focus on the chase. She throws her chest to him and digs her nails into his upper back as he throws her hips up and down, faster and faster. She can't even think straight, her focus so singular and strained, finally reaching her goal.

She cries into his ear, cries his name, cries out her delight and love and as the waves crash down on her, his are building and building. She can sense he's close by the furrow of his brow and intense concentration. He picks her up, removing himself from her only to throw her down on the bed again, much to her surprise. An audible gasp as she lands. He's quickly back on top of her and she lies back and spreads herself for him. He eases into her, shuddering again at this bliss. With both hands on the sides of her face, and her arms under his, wrapped around the middle of his back, he takes her sweetly. Kissing her passionately as he increases his thrusting speed. She turns her face to his cheek and kisses his neck, leading up to his ear, and leaves a long hot breath there, pushing him to his limit. His thrusts become stronger, faster until she can see that somewhat far off look in his eyes and she's crying his name, wanting to grant him release, turned on by the idea of his hot seed inside her, filling her. Like a primitive need for it, she encourages his orgasm, she keeps crying his name...

"Cullen... Cu..Cullen!! .. Oh my... CULLEN!! Cull----" 


	3. Consciousness

 

He'd sat beside her bed for 3 days. He'd fallen asleep at his post a couple times often awoken by his all too familiar nightmare, and of new ones that seem to be determined to stick around. He dreamt of her never waking up, or of her waking but not remembering him.. It terrifies him. He doesn't even know if she returns his feelings, but he knows now - undoubtedly he loves her in ways he didn't know he was capable of. He respects her as a warrior, a leader, a human being.. He loves her as a friend, and wishes there could be more between them. But how could there be? She has much more important things to busy herself with than her silly lovesick commander.  _Her_ commander. He needed to get a grip on these feelings, they would not do their cause any good. 

Looking at her face, still and peaceful in sleep, but very much so fighting the red lyrium in her system, he willed her to wake up. Begged in his head to just open her eyes. Josephine and Leliana had tried to convince him to get some proper sleep in his tent but he had refused. They eventually gave up and joined him for a few hours each day. Dorian came by twice every day to read a book aloud, convinced that it was doing her a comfort although everyone knew it was more of a comfort to themselves. Focusing on words filling the tent's air space helped distract from the ominous fear taking hold. Cassandra came pacing the room until Cullen asked her to have a seat, explaining that her nervous habit wasn't putting anyone at ease. She changed her habit to sitting in the corner with one of Varric's manuscripts. Solas had spent the time in the healers tent concocting different potions to try to help their Herald. To help her when she woke to not feel the effects of red lyrium, to not feel too weak, too tired.. Anything for her to be comforted.

Varric would come around and bring food to those who sat with her in the tent, he would try to raise their spirits with a story or tidbit of their Herald's bravery on the long missions away from Haven. Sera only really visited with Varric, knowing there would be food instead of feelings and stories instead of silence. She usually brought Cole with her. He had tried to listen to Ellanora's dreams, he wanted to help, but Leliana had asked that he leave her be. So instead he listened to their worries, their concerns for her and helped them instead where he could. Blackwall was new to their little family but he spent some time visiting, keeping to himself while whittling little figurines of Ellanora's favourite animals. Cullen was taken aback by the man's sensitivity and skill. He carved a fennec, a wolf, and a bear. Evidently reminders of animals they crossed paths with when they first met in the Hinterlands. Cullen was impressed and touched by the actions of everyone huddled together in this little tent, watching their Herald intently not to miss one moment where she may awaken.

On the third night as Cullen sat in her tent alone, reading one of Ellanora's missives on her last journey to the Hinterlands, he heard her rustle. He dropped the missive, focusing his attention on her. He could see her brow furrow and she began twitching her fingers, moving her hands.. She was grasping at the linen on the sides of her, digging her fingers into clots of blanket. Her head moved from side to side and her back was slightly arching up and down as her left hand let go of the linen and rested on her stomach. Cullen reached for her hand to assure her he was there for her, and she promptly pulled his hand to her waist, her hand atop his. She was moaning in a low breathy voice that he's certain he would not have heard if she hadn't pulled him closer. She was slightly thrashing and he assumed she was having a nightmare. Her breathing was coming in fast and hot, a bead of sweat coming down her forehead. He kept his hand firm on her waist as her hips seemed to rise and move side to side trying to be free of the tight linens.

  
"Cull... Cullen..." She moaned.

"Yes, Ellanora - I.. I'm here.. Everything is alright.." 

"Oh my--- CULLEN!! Cull--"  

She jolted up, out of breath, her vision nothing but white spots slowly fading. It was a dream. Maker, was that ever a dream. Did it mean...? Well, of course he's handsome, and they do flirt often, but it was just a dream. But why did she feel like it lingered? Like it was attainable? All these thoughts ransacked her mind as her vision returned. Feeling returning to her, she felt a hand on hers, she looked up and found his eyes first. A worried brow, a warm look, endearing, concerned, full of that same love she saw in her dream. She stared into his amber eyes in disbelief, feeling very.. drawn to him. She dismissed that thought as she cleared her throat.. but it lingered...

"Cullen... I.. Um, hello."  

"Makers breath Ella, we've been so worried, you're awake - thank the Maker. You.. uh, You seemed to be dreaming.." 

"Uhh, yes I uh, I was. I was - " 

Dorian scrambled into the room. "My dearest! How lovely of you to join us we were really starting to get bored of watching you sleep!" Dorian turned his head out the tent to yell, "Inquisition! Our sleeping beauty wakes! Varric! Please fetch the healers!"  


Cullen stared at their aptly named Sleeping Beauty as she smiled weakly at her friend. Dorian sat on her right side and nodded across the bed at Cullen. "So is the folklore true? Was it true love's kiss to awaken our beloved Herald?"   


Ellanora shot Dorian a nasty look only he could see and Cullen's eyes found the floor. Cullen cleared his throat and they both realized their fingers were still entwined. They both consciously removed their hold slowly to try not to grant Dorian any satisfaction for drama. "I'll see about those healers, and fetch you something to eat, you must be starving, my lady." Cullen declared as he rose to his feet. She offered him a weak but warm smile. "Thank you, comman-- Cullen. Thank you Cullen."  


As Cullen exited the tent, and before the hurried steps of her companions found the entrance to her tent, she turned to Dorian and punched him swiftly in the arm.

"Ow, my lady."  



	4. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the road to Skyhold.

Ellanora had taken only an extra day after waking before bringing travel plans and requisitions to the makeshift war council around the fire pit. She had in that day created a plan to march to an old Elven fortress Solas insisted would be fitting for their masses. The night before the entire camp had rejoiced in their Herald's survival and the group banded together to share a united bond, their voices barreling down the mountain range, challenging anyone to question their new determination. It had made Ella slightly uncomfortable once again being branded the Herald of Andraste but she understood how this was needed. How every soldier needed to believe, had to whole heartedly give themselves to this cause. If she was needed to be that muse, that inspiration, she could fill that need. She saw how much was on her shoulders, how much they relied on her. She would step up, she would defend the good people in this world, she would fight.

The trip to Skyhold was a long one. Cullen rode with his soldiers as they pushed their horses for more travel than they had normally experienced in Haven. Ellanora was ahead with Solas. The two mages striding up the mountain on foot, Ella slowing down occasionally so's not to rip her bandaging of her broken ribs or the stitching in her side. It drove Cullen into madness that she refused to sit horseback on the treck. Cole appeared out of nowhere - of course. "Soon. Ripping, tearing. The pain, searing her, she will wish she stopped sooner. You told her so. She wouldn't listen.. Bending it she is, soon to break it..." Cullen knew immediately what Cole was talking about and he had had absolutely enough. He rode forward. "Herald, really. You need to let your injuries heal, you cannot push yourself like this anymore." He stepped off his Ferelden steed and ushered her to him. "I insist. Please, Ella." She responded by putting her hands on her hips and rolling her eyes. "Commander, I am fine, I swear." Blackwall found himself chuckling behind Cullen. "She's afraid to ride, Commander. Afraid she'll fall off. You'll have to tie her to the poor animal." Ella gave Blackwall a look as if he had just read her diary to the world. She scolded him with her ocean blue eyes but he continued to laugh and laugh as he walked on. Cullen stared at her and couldn't help but laugh. An adorable vulnerability he thought.

He was speaking before he could think. "Well then, ride with me. I won't let you fall, and you can allow your wounds to heal. This way you wont ruin any of the work the healers have done for you. Come." He could feel his cheeks flush, becoming aware of his request. She stared right back at him as she considered his offer. "If it means you'll stop nagging me, then fine." She teased at him, and stepped towards the brown Ferelden beast. With her healing broken ribs and stitches he had to be careful lifting her up to the horse. He could sense her apprehension staring at the horse, and before he lifted her he met her eyes with his. "I won't let you fall, I promise." His first promise to her. His first promise of many. She nodded and allowed him to boost her up. He noticed how light she was in his arms, how she felt under his hands. He dismissed the thought and sensation in his fingertips as he hopped up to the saddle. She gasped slightly at the new weight on the saddle, scared the horse would reject the two bodies on it and throw them forward.

Cullen reached his arms around her to grab the reigns. She exhaled a deep breath she had been holding in and let her nerves fade away. She felt the same strange warmth and safety creep over her from her dream, putting her at ease. She slowly rested her back into her commander. Slowly, slowly, testing to see if he would notice her weight leaning into him. He did, but didn't give her any indication why she shouldn't relax into his arms. He felt an unspoken trust she was allowing to him. He felt so touched.. proud even, that she trusted him to get on the horse and that she was comfortable leaning her body into him during the ride. A smile graced his face as her head lulled into his shoulder and he realized she had fallen asleep. "You two really do make an adorable couple." Varric grinned and winked at the commander.

Cullen lightly tossed the reigns to speed up the horse. "Shut up, Varric."

Cullen could still hear the dwarf laughing behind him and Solas' light chuckle chiming in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have about 20 chapters written, I literally write on my way to work on the bus and the way home, and I'm really eager to share with the AO3 community.. I'd love to hear your thoughts! Thanks for reading and subscribe for updates! I don't have a beta so I'm all on my own haha so sorry for any spelling mistakes.


	5. Welcome to Skyhold

They arrived at Skyhold in the afternoon. It was exciting and overwhelming for the group. She had lead them to their sanctuary, their new home, with much thanks to Solas. Cullen set her down from the horse once they were close to the gates. Blushing while she thanked Cullen, she lightly ran ahead to find Solas. She embraced the mage thanking him for showing them a place once belonging to his ancestors. Solas surprisingly allowed the physical gesture and offered Ellanora a soft smile. Cullen found himself slightly bothered by this exchange. Ridiculous, he knew. She had just ridden with him for hours, fallen asleep in his arms, she had trusted him with that. But seeing her run into another man's arms, a fellow mage, perhaps someone who could understand her more than he, didn't bode well for Cullen. He reminded himself that they weren't together, that his feelings overwhelming him with every breath he took were unknown to her, and finally that nothing would ever come of it. Pushing through the gates he began to make a mental checklist of work to be done in the coming weeks of securing and settling into this fortress.

 

Ellanora was excited for Skyhold and all it may bring, but felt a tinge of guilt at all the people of Haven who didn't make it out. She knew she was responsible for the people she walked with now getting safely out, but she wished she could have saved them all. The guilt began weighing heavier and heavier on her the more she walked about this fortress of stone. She found Leliana on the steps and went to approach her to assemble a war council. She wanted to venture out again. She wanted to leave tomorrow. She wanted to get back into her oddly comfortable routine of closing rifts and killing demons. She wanted to stop looking upon the crowd and being aware that some familiar faces of Haven were not looking back. She wanted to stop the images in her head of how they may have died, or of them calling out for her to help them, to save them. She dreamt of their faces every time she slept since Haven. Even on that blighted horse. She thought for a moment at how she felt waking up, jolted from her dreams, in the arms of her commander. It was, well, pleasant would be a word for it. But there was no time to think things like that as she was on her way to see Leliana.

It wasn't until her third step onto the stairs that she heard the crowd behind her. She turned to see a mass of people, looking up at her, smiling. Cassandra was behind her, following her steps up to Leliana. "The Inquisition needs a leader. A leader who has already been leading it. You." Ella looked down again to see an eager crowd. Her eyes travelled from soldiers, to merchants, to Josephine stepping in beside Cullen. "Perhaps I didn't hear you correctly.. A _mage_ at the head of the inquisition??" Ellanora felt nervous, felt nauseas to be honest. This was a lot of pressure all at once. "Not a mage. You." Cassandra went on about the Maker's will and Ella could hear her heartbeat in her ears, thrumming loud drowning Cassandra's words out. She stared at the sword in Leliana's hands. "...The choice is yours to make." She wasn't sure if she could do this, what if she failed? All these people relying on her, on her actions, on her mark. She'd have to, she must. Ellanora looked at the crowd again her eyes searched for him. Finding him at the front of the lines, of course. Her eyes met his and he nodded. As if everything she needed to hear was summarized into one slight head movement. He believed in her. They all did.

 

"With fear running rampant, they need to see a mage standing for what is right. I'll defeat Corepheyus standing with them. Not over them." A smile cast over Leliana and Cassandra's faces. Pride, she thought. She was overwhelmed again and could hear Cassandra addressing the crowd and the thoughts filled her head again of the faces of whom they had lost. Of them crying her name to save them. Of the bodies charred in the Temple of Sacred Ashes. The thoughts dragged on as she stared at the people below, her mind twisting their faces into those charred, unrecognizable. Her heart rate quickened, her breath shallow. "Inquisition! Will you follow?" His voice barreled through the courtyard, startled her. Cheers from the people. "Will you fight??" A louder echo of the prior cheers. "Will we triumph?" It was deafening now. "Your leader, your Herald. Your Inquisitor!" It was like his voice pushed all those thoughts away. Pushed all her fears and doubts and nerves away. She raised her sword to the crowd and laughed when Josephine let go of her noble demeanor and yelled with the crowd. She was their leader, officially. This wasn't going to be easy. But no one ever said it would be.

 

 


	6. Dorian, the Brat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dorian is, as Sera would say, a prissy-pants.

Skyhold was buzzing. She was still eager to head out. She had received word back in Haven of a mercenary group that wanted to meet her, she figured now was as good a time as any to grow their clan. Once they determined which room in the fortress would suffice for their meetings, she held a meeting and discussed it. They agreed, and she was to leave the next morning with Varric, Cassandra and Blackwall to the Storm Coast. Their meeting wasn't as long as anticipated and she was left with the rest of the afternoon to do with as she pleased. It wasn't often they all agreed on something she suggested. She was willing to wager this may be a first and last time. Cullen caught her eye as Leliana and Josephine left the room.

"Pleased to be heading out again?" He asked. She considered his question momentarily. "Strangely, 'out there' seems more familiar than being here, being...this, does. I'm looking forward to taking care of some things, yes." He understood. Her whole path leading up to this had been decided for her. She made a choice today but a difficult one nonetheless. She was now an answer to a question she didn't ask.

"My lady, I know you will accomplish many great things. This is but the beginning of it. It's not often we finish our meetings so earnestly. Try to claim your comforts before losing them tomorrow." She nodded at her commander. She wanted to say more, or to say something clever, but he made for the door and she was alone. She took a deep breath and relieved a deep sigh. On with the day, then.

She wandered around Skyhold, taking it in. She visited Solas, admired his mural. "You missed a spot, Solas." He didn't find this particularly funny but still looked at where she pointed with a grimace. She laughed as she headed to the stairs enjoying that she made him question himself. She found Dorian, moping in a chair in his modest library.

"What's the matter, love?" She made to sit beside him on his right and he turned his body to the left, giving her his back. She laughed at this immature attempt to ignore her. "You know I am the youngest of seven siblings, I created that move, darling. Now, out with it, what's the matter?" She reached her hand to his knee and he brushed it off of him, promptly. Her smile was unfazed. " _I_ wanted to go to the Storm Coast. You're taking the dwarf for his stories, the warden and his unsightly beard and the one lady here, second to you - of course, who needs a good lay. It's not fair." He picked up a bottle of Tevinter's finest wine and poured himself a handsome glass.

 She clicked her tongue to her teeth. "tsk, tsk, Dorian. Now you know you don't mean that, except maybe that part about Cassandra, I couldn't agree more. But I do need those three when I meet this Mercenary leader. I need him to see we have a very .. unique group of people working with us. From Grey Warden to Truth Seeker, to.. Dwarf. I know you'll understand. Come now, let's have some wine together and you can tell me all about who you would match with our dear friend Cassandra." She lightly pushed at his arm, encouraging him to come out of his mood.

 He poured her a glass from his bottle and smiled a devious smile she knew would only mean trouble. "Fine, my dear. You run off to the Storm Coast and I'll be left here with our beloved Commander. How do you like the wine? Oh, did you know I had brought a case of this fine wine from Redcliff? Yes I do believe I'll enjoy sharing this wine over a chess game or two. You do know how I get after too many of these, oh I do hope I can keep from sharing other.. delicacies."

 She swallowed her wine she had been holding in her mouth while he delivered his threat. Dorian was the only one she told of her dream. She shouldn't have but he saw right through her blushing after the Commander left her tent that night. She confided in him and she now regretted it immensely. She downed the rest of her glass, and rose to her feet.

"I'll go speak to Blackwall." She headed down the stairs to meet the man in the stables, and inform him he wont be needed this mission after all.

 Dorian laughed and laughed, spilling his wine. He called out to her from the top of the stairs, "Check-mate, darling!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting another tomorrow.. got another dream sequence comin at cha soon.  
> comments and kudos are my mana :)


	7. Damp Days and Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised a dream sequence. I've been laughing to myself at the title of this chapter.  
> Comments are always appreciated :)

They arrived at the Storm Coast a few days later in the evening. They were covered in dirt, exhausted from the trip. Scout Harding gave Ellanora a summary of the land. She always hated this part. So depressing. She begged Harding to one day give her a report that didn't involve Venatori or dragons or darkspawn although she didn't anticipate it happening anytime soon. It was rainy, depressing and gloomy in the Storm Coast. Dorian was miserable and that made Ella giggle to herself. She knew he was regretting insisting on joining her party. Between his sour mood and his hair's lack of upkeep he resembled a 'mustached wet dog' as Varric coined. They were to rest at base camp before taking off again the next morning to explore the land, and meet The Iron Bull. 

Heading to her tent she processed Harding's report. Grey Warden artifacts, spiders in a cave, and a dragon.. She took a deep breath. The idea of fighting a dragon both terrified and exhilarated Ella. She was no doubt a very skilled Mage, having been the one chosen to attend the Conclave with Ostwick's first enchanter, Ellanora's mentor. But a dragon? That took a team, an army to defeat! She settled into bed that night worried about what may come the morrow. She allowed herself a brief thought of her commander, of how he stood in the crowd back in Skyhold, confident in her. If he believed in her, then she must be capable of carrying this weight. Some of her worry floated away from her and she drifted into slumber.

That night she dreamt of a new fantasy. A fantasy she fell right into without warning or prelude.

She was hot all over, the air was thick with desire and sex. She could feel her hands being held above her head, but couldn't see anything. She had a moment of panic before it was replaced with intense pleasure. Kisses were lining her jawline down her neck while a familiar body was thrusting into her, knocking the air out of her lungs with each movement. Her legs were wrapped around him, intertwined. Sweat was beading down her forehead. She wasn't sure where she was but the room was hot. She was moving her hips in time with him, granting him deeper into her.

His kisses travelled back to her lips, willing her mouth open to allow him in. She obliged and gasped with pleasure. It was as if the removal of her vision enhanced every sensation, making every thrust more intense than before. She moaned loudly as her lover kissed her passionately, caressing her tongue with his. He moved one of his hands to her cheek, cupping it tenderly. She brought her free hand down to rest on his sculpted shoulder. If she leaned her head back she could see slightly through her blindfold. She found his scar first. That beautiful, seductive little scar tugging at his lips as he kissed down her jawline. The sight of him taking her in this way, of him being so dominant, and her giving herself to her love.. She revelled in it.

She dug her nails into his hand and shoulder feeling the familiar swell in her. He sensed the change in her, the focus, thrusting deeper, holding her tighter. This time it was not a gradual build up it, it came all at once, sending sensation over her entire body. He was thrusting faster to finish with her. He sent her over into her climax, his just a moment after. They cried out almost simultaneously. Her into the stale air and him into her collarbone.

They spent a moment collecting their breath, and he slowly removed himself from her. He fell to her side and helped her sit up while she worked on the ties to her blindfold. "Does that satisfy your fantasy, love?" He asked. She was still fumbling with the stupid knots.

"And then some, Cullen. Thank you. Say, could you help me with this blighted thing?" 

He laughed softly at her expense at tugged at the knotted mess. In a moment it was off, and she opened her eyes. 

She found herself in her tent, alone. 


	8. Release

She got dressed in a huff. Annoyed, frustrated.. She didn't have the time to sort out the dream and what it meant and how wonderful her sleep had been because of it. She only had time to put on her boots, button up her armour and get the hell out of her tent. She was tightly wound as she called out to her team. "Cassandra, Varric, Dorian - wake up! I am to see a man about a Bull!"

She barely waited for them to catch up before heading down the path to the water. She was determined, she was overwhelmed, she was cranky. "Oh darling why must we hit the ground running? What has gotten into you on this fine, rainy morning?" She had no interest in answering Dorian's question. She needed to shake this unresolved feeling, she needed calm, she needed ...release. She saw the men fighting by the shore. "Oh great, a show for us. Wait, is that a Qunari??" Dorian yawned and sat down at a fallen tree log. Ellanora charged towards the scene. Cassandra was taken aback by the action.. "But, Herald, we were invited to observe!" 

Ella put herself right into the action, feeling her magic under her fingertips anticipating the dispel. She isolated a man in ice for The Iron Bull to demolish. The giant looked over his shoulder and nodded in her direction. She sent two more men into the air with a lightning spell cast at the ground to anyone not watching their steps. The man who met her in Haven, Krem, gave her a wink over his shoulder for relieving him of the two simultaneous attackers before barreling to them once more. Two men focused on her, and The Iron Bull threw her a long warrior greatsword. She caught it and before throwing her staff down, cast an wall of fire their way. They panicked at the fire licking their skin, before she descended with her sword, into the chest of one, and across the neck of the other. Looking around the victory was obvious.

The Iron Bull walked towards her in quick, long strides. Her party standing now behind her. "So you're with the Inquisition, huh? Glad you could make it. Come on, have a seat, drinks are coming." The Iron Bull motioned for her to follow him. "So lady, I'd suggested to Krem, to pass on a message to your leader to come and see The Chargers in full reign. I appreciate your assault but I had intended it to be a demonstration for someone of authority. Was that not brought to your leader?" He sat on a dead log on the sand. Before Ella could respond, Cassandra interjected "This is the Inquisitor, The Herald of Andraste. The leader whom you speak so carelessly of." Iron Bull shrugged his shoulders. 

Ellanora looked behind her and found her companions searching her for an explanation for her sudden combat. "Iron Bull, I needed to see how we would work together, in the field, in the moment. I have no interest in just observing. I am not a Lord nor a Lady merely sending soldiers out to war. I fight with a team I can trust, I can parry with. Iron Bull, this is my team, Varric and his lovelorn, Bianca, Seeker Cassandra on my right and Dorian of Tevinter beside me." Her entire party nodded at The Iron Bull and The Chargers. "I have to admit, I respect you a lot more than I thought I already did, boss." He winked at Ella before handing her a mug of some draught. She sat down and cracked the kinks in her neck and shoulders as The Iron Bull introduced his team of Chargers, and described his position with the Qunari.

She let herself gather her breath and take a long swig of her mug, finally feeling the release she needed that morning.


	9. Discovery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so begins some dramaaaaaa

It had been two weeks.

Two weeks of wet boots and clothes and weighed down armour. Two weeks of cold air that attached itself to skin, hardly wavering even in front of the fire. They procured the Grey Warden artifacts that Ella was eager to show to Blackwall, feeling a bit of guilt for the man. They had also, much to Dorian's distain, rid the caves of it's spider inhabitants. All the while closing rifts, defeating demons and gathering herbs and stone to send ahead to Skyhold.

Despite her sincere hatred of the Storm Coast, today was a good day. Her team with the new addition of the Iron Bull, faced a Dragon that afternoon. They fought viciously, surprising themselves of their power against such a beast. Ella was particularly proud of her team and how they worked together, protected and called out to each other. The Iron Bull had suggested claiming the head, as it was good luck. Dorian said Ella should make new armour with it, start a fashion trend. Cassandra thought it may be useful near the training camps, to inspire and modivate the soldiers. Varric just thought of it as pretty damn badass no matter what the hell she decided to do with it. Ellanora agreed and went to see her requisitions officer to make appropriate travel arrangements for the dome.

 "We'll have it sent out in the morrow, ser. Correspondence came in earlier from Skyhold, here." She handed Ella two parchments, one obviously sent from Leliana with tiny writing littering every space of the page, and the other in Cullen's familiar writing, addressed to 'Seeker Cassandra' and sealed. As she passed the parchment to Cassandra she could hardly suppress her curiousity. Cassandra sat near the fire away from the group to open the letter, she quickly looked around before lifting the final fold. Ellanora wondered what could be in the letter that Cassandra would need to hide so desperately.

Could they be an item? Ella was aware that Cullen and Cassandra had known eachother previously, that Cassandra had hand picked their commander. Maybe they had a history then, and maybe they have a present. She tried to shake the idea out of her mind. She glanced at Cassandra again. In the light of the fire she noticed how pretty the Seeker really was. Of course she was attractive, but her intimidating nature usually demanded more attention. Ella saw her petite but strong frame, recounted her form in battle..of course Cullen would want that. The two had so much in common, an ex-Templar and a Seeker, both warriors... it made sense.

She wasn't enjoying this line of thought her mind had conjured. It.. bothered her. Her dreams have been showing her feelings she wasn't aware of until recently. They had made her eager to see her Commander again, to make him blush, maybe even push him against the wall and.. Wait, no - she couldn't be thinking like that anymore, he wasn't hers to fantasize about. He and Cassandra must be an item if he is sending her a missive that couldn't wait the two week journey. Ella broke off her train of thought and stepped away to read her own parchment from Leliana.

_Blondie,  
How's the weather? Our Black lab is rather sad here, pacing a lot in the barn. Have you any idea where his bones are buried? The kid keeps surprising guests, did you know Josephine can jump almost her own height straight into the air? We miss you around the table. See you for lunch soon? _  
_P.S.The raven bites._

Ellanora laughed at the idea of Josephine being scared of all things, little Cole. Poor soul, she thought. She made a mental note to respond to Leliana with travel plans in the morning. Tomorrow they would leave the Coast on a three day treck back to Skyhold. Tonight, they would celebrate. The Iron Bull brought a barrel of Ale, Dorian had wine in his tent and Varric had travelled with a flask of unknown, home made liquor. Ella decided to stick with Ale. Bull stood up to address his comrades, "Cheers all, for one fucking awesome battle today! It was a beautiful beast, and it will make for an attractive addition in Skyhold!" He held out his mug to salute the party.

"Cullen is going to be pissed!" Varric announced and laughed to himself. Ella wondered why -what could he be pissed about anyhow? That she had dragged Cassandra into a dangerous fight with a flying fire breathing beast? "Oh well." She sighed and caught Varric's surprised eyes. "To us!" She yelled before he could speak, throwing her cup into the air for her friends to reach. Cassandra had been sitting to the side, watching the lot celebrate.

"If you'll excuse me Inquisitor I will be in my tent attending to some correspondence. Please don't drink any of Varric's swill. For your own sake, trust me." The group nodded to Cassandra as she took her leave. "It's an acquired taste, Seeker." Varric barked at her retreat. As he took a sip from his flask Ella swore she saw him wince.

They continued their celebrations into the late hours of the night. Varric was playing the lute - poorly. Ruining what was a lovely song of the autumn leaves changing colour. Dorian stood and nearly begged Ella to dance. She sat with her knees to her chin, shaking her head. "No thank you, Dorian." He pouted his lip, "Oh sweetling you really must get more interesting. Or I may have to return to Tevinter out of sheer boredom!" Bull grabbed Dorian's hand and spun him in place, much to the surprise of the mage. "Unhand me, you Brute!" Dorian yelled, but flashed a small smile to the Qunari giant.

The Iron Bull continued to spin and dip the mage as Varric continued his slow assault to the sweet tune. Ellanora looked up at her friends, laughing and dancing together around the fire, she let a smile spread across her face, taking in the scene. She could feel Varric's eyes on her and she was happy she was smiling, it was a mask to her true feelings. "Whats the matter mopey - missing someone back home?" Varric was a little too good at reading people. "I'm just tired, Varric, I think I'll retire for the night. Gentlemen."

She took her last sip from her mug and set out for her tent. She was tired, admittedly, but the exhaustion really came from fighting off her feelings, keeping herself unaware of their power or desperation. She kicked her boots off and sat on her cot. With a deep breathe and a long sigh she willed herself not to think of him. For her mind to be clear and her heart, cold. She slept soundly that night, not dreaming a single dream.

The next morning she wrote a quick missive to Skyhold, before finishing her packing and heading for the road.

_Nightingale,_  
_Lunch sounds lovely, I can meet you in three moons if that suits you. I heard the strangest thing around the markets the other day, Dragon bone is apparently all the rage in Thedas, a new trend in furnishings! Sturdy for chairs or benches, I could hardly believe it myself. We will have much to discuss at the lunch table. Give the black lab some attention for me, perhaps he could join us for lunch? I have some treats for him. See you soon._

As she tied the note to the raven, her attention was drawn to Bull's tent opening. Dorian was exiting and heading to his own tent, holding his boots in his hands. His hair was a blighted mess and he looked miserable at the sight of the morning sun. Ellanora could not contain her laughter. The mage stood facing his friend, unimpressed. "Oh shut-up darling. What happens in the Storm Coast, stays in the Storm Coast."

She followed her friend into his tent to hear all the details of a night with The Iron Bull.


	10. With Honour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's what Cullen's missive to Cassandra was all about.  
> I also really like Adan, I thought he should have played a bigger role in the game, but here he is being a help :)

He had grown used to the headache. It lingered throughout the day never letting up. It was the increased pain from light and sound that drove him mad. How could he fulfill his duties as commander when he winced everytime the door to his office opened and a soldier spoke. His hands were shaking, making his signature on missives messy and looking rushed. His body pulsed with pain, he could feel it travelling through his veins, the lyrium spreading, singing to his blood. He was so tired. Nightmares riddled his sleep every night granting him two, maybe three hours of rest - if you could call it that.

He had increased his time on the training grounds, pushing his soldiers to fight more aggressively, to be faster, to outsmart the opponent. He had hoped the increase of physicality would overwhelm his body and qualm his nightmares, even if just for one night. Sitting at his desk, headache in full effect, he decided a walk might do him well, the cold air of Skyhold, the change of scenery. As he stood up from his chair his legs buckled and he caught himself on his desk. The expression on his face was pure annoyance. He was furious.

He had given so much of himself to the Chantry, to the Order. Now here he was fighting for a cause he believed so much in, for a leader he respected, loved even, and he couldn't find the strength in that moment to stand. How on earth could he help in the war against Corepheyus? Against the war for the world? Slamming his hands into his desk he sat in his chair once more. Rubbing his temples he grasped his quill and a fresh parchment. He knew what he must do, and he knew just who he could confide in. He began writing a missive to Cassandra.

_Lady Cassandra,_  
It has regrettably gotten much worse. I'm afraid I must ask something of you. Something I had hoped wouldn't come up. If this persists, I must ask you to find my replacement. I cannot allow this to waver my position or capabilities. I trust you to be unbiased and honest when the time comes. I shall await your return if you'd like to discuss in person. Thank you, Seeker. With honour,  
Cullen.

He folded the parchment into an envelope and sealed it with hot wax, writing "Seeker Cassandra" on the front. There was a knock on his office door. "Enter" he barked. Adan was at the door and strode into the room. Cullen felt a pang of guilt from his address of the man and stood to greet the man. "Commander, sit, it's fine really. Look, I seen you in the training yard the other day and here, thought you might need this."

He threw a satchel of dried leaves and herbs onto Cullen's desk. "What's this, Adan?" He had no idea what the man was offering him.

"It's tea. A concoction of mine that helps with real bad headaches. Ser, I know yer off the lyrium." Cullen looked down at the satchel then back at the man before him. "Did Cassandra ..." Adan put his hand up, cutting Cullen off. "No, I have been overseeing the lyrium supply for the Templars and noticed none has made its way to you. I thought maybe you had your own supply but seeing you the other day I knew were clear of it."

Cullen sighed and found his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose again. "It's been a few months. It's been...difficult."

"..You're crazy you know that? The chances of going mad or dying of the withdrawals.. Does the inquisitor know?? --Don't answer that, none of my business. Look, Commander - I respect you for it.  ..Don't look at me like that it was nothing, honest. Good day Ser." Cullen remained processing what Adan had just told him. The man spoke far too quickly for his own good. Assembling his words, Cullen was touched by the gesture, he nodded to the man, "Thank you Adan, good day. ...Oh and, Adan?..."

"--Don't worry ser, not a word." Adan interjected and left his office.

Cullen sat back in his chair and took a deep breath. He was grateful to have friends in Skyhold.


	11. Home Sweet Home

They arrived home in the afternoon as promised. Soldiers cheered as the group entered the gates of Skyhold. Some just stood and stared at the giant Qunari man walking beside their Inquisitor. Ella felt a little bad for her new friend and decided to playfully nudge into his shoulder, instigating a brief playful run-around. The soldiers seemed to relax seeing their leader had obviously become friends with the man. She suggested Bull get comfortable at the Tavern, and promised after her council meeting she would meet him for a drink and give him the official tour of Skyhold. Bull put his hand on her shoulder and thanked her sincerely. He had obviously seen through her attempt at him appearing more likeable, and was grateful for it. He headed to the Tavern and she found her feet on the familiar stairs leading to the great hall. She walked the hallway watching her feet. She knew she must look exhausted and filthy from her travels. She focused on her steps getting her to the end of the hall, and looked up towards her quarters. Knowing how nice it would be to have a bath or even just change her shoes. But she knew her councilors would be waiting for her, having heard the bell that she had arrived. And then she saw it. It would have only just arrived before herself, how could she have had time? It had been boiled to remove the muscle, tissue and skin. It was her very own dragon bone thrown. It was beautiful. It demanded attention, stole the focus of the entire room. She knew she owed Leliana for this, big time.

She ran into Josephine's office, barreling for the war chamber's door. Running in, she rushed into Leliana in an embrace, nearly knocking the rogue over. "I love it, I love it! Thank you!" Leliana pulled herself away from the hug, laughing to herself. "You'd think I killed the damned thing for you. Honestly, it was nothing. I merely took your suggestion. I take it things went well in the Storm Coast, then?" Ella understood now it was back to business and she turned to face the rest of the council. Josephine stood in front of her, beaming, seemingly pleased the Inquisitor was back in Skyhold's embrace.

Cullen stood to the left of Josephine, looking irritated, or worried about something. Ellanora assumed she would hear about how foolish it was to chase down and kill a dragon with his beloved in her party, in her care.  It may have been foolish but Maker, was it exhilarating! She squared her shoulders and looked up at him, readying herself for the confrontation. He stood with his arms crossing his chest, and he exhaled a deep sigh before asking, "Why?" She found herself perplexed at the question. She assumed he would just start yelling or pacing around her like a lion hunting it's lamb.

"..Whynot? This jackass, Corepheyus has an arch-demon thingy.. whynot get some practice before facing him... besides, it was.. fun." She refused to meet his eyes at the delivery of her last words. She saw him bring his hand to the bridge of his nose, pinching it between his fingers.

"Inquisitor... you cannot be so.. careless." Her eyes found his. Soft, full of concern. Seeing that worry hurt her more than the disappointment in his voice. What would it be like to have someone worry for her like that? She looked back down at the war table. He continued, "Ellanora, what if something had gone wrong? What if---?" His thought was interrupted by a knock at the War Chamber door. It seemed odd to all of them, they were never interrupted during a meeting. Cullen glared at Ella before heading to the door, as if to imply he wasn't done with her yet. He opened the door and Blackwall stood in the doorway.

 "Forgive me, I was told our Lady had returned and requested I join her at the table?" Ella remembered her missive and ushered him into the room, happy for the forced change of subject. "Come in, come in Blackwall. I have much to discuss with you. In the Storm Coast I found some articles. Proof of Grey Wardens in the area." The meeting continued on for a few hours. She shared with Blackwall all the details she obtained on the Wardens and he left once that business had concluded. 

Ellanora went on to tell her advisors of The Iron Bull. How although his ties to the Qun may appear problematic, he had been forth coming about his intentions as a spy, and how it would benefit them. Her councilors had much to say about this but they agreed in the end he was vital to their cause. She discussed the rifts, the demonic activity in the area and all she encountered in her two weeks there. She was running a mental checklist in her head of what she needed to report when Josephine interrupted.

"Thank you Inquisitor for your accounts of the Storm Coast, but I'm sure you would like to relax after your venture. We can reconvene tomorrow morning if it suits everyone." Ella had never loved Josephine more than in that moment. She offered a smile to her ambassador. Leliana nodded and the two women made for the door. "Thank you again, Nightingale." Leliana waved her hand in the air as she left the room.

Ella watched them leave and turned her attention to Cullen, standing between her and the doorway. She had hoped he would let it be but she knew better. Her commander was passionate, patient and as Varric coined - pissed.  "Ella, I just wanted to say.."

\--"Commander, please. I realize my actions may have been impulsive but they did serve a true purpose. Nothing went wrong, everyone is fine. I am going to have a bath then head to the Tavern for a drink. You can relax - your precious cargo is safe."

He looked at her quizzically, stumped by her last words. As she made for the door, he caught her elbow, softly. "Inquis - Ella... I was just going to say ... your throne... it's pretty damn badass."

He was smirking at her. The damned scar just beckoning her, driving her insane she found herself staring at it. She wondered what it felt like under her touch, under her kiss. He released her elbow and headed out of the room. She was left there, lingering. Feeling the same buzz that she felt after one of her dreams. She leaned against the war table and let her blonde hair fall over her face. She sighed and whispered under her breath. "Shit."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got a dream sequence coming up after this chapter..  
> This one will be from Cullen's filthy mind this time!  
> Comments keep me going, guys. I've been working hard on leading up to The Winter Palace it's been tricky.  
> Chapters are getting longer as well. Let me know your thoughts! :)


	12. Shutup, Cullen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *squeeeeeeeeeee*  
> Cullen dreams :)

He headed back to his office wondering what had gone on in that meeting. He chuckled under his breath at how she looked at him just then. He saw her eyes wander to his lips and he fought with every bit of himself to walk away. He knew she was a big flirt, he had seen it with Blackwall and Dorian but her lingering felt different. His mind jumped to a new thought. What had she meant by "precious cargo"? Could she have known of his feelings? He stopped himself in the courtyard to consider that thought.

"Maker's breath" He sighed. He felt like such a fool. She knew, and there he stood keeping her from leaving the room. He had shamelessly flirted with her. Of course she couldn't meet his eyes, she must be so uncomfortable. He continued his walk back to his office shaking his head, in disbelief of his lack of control. She made him weak, he lost his will to focus when he saw those bright blue eyes.

He stepped into his office and got straight to work. He found Cassandra's missive left on his desk from that morning. She had agreed to his terms, promising to keep an eye on him and in the meantime scout a potential replacement. She wasn't happy about it, he could tell, but she was at his service in lieu of his situation. She did finish her missive with a reminder that he should tell the Herald. He knew he must, he just, had to gather his thoughts first. She had only just arrived and he already found himself flustered. He settled into his chair and put Cassandra's letter in his desk drawer, locking it away. He spent the rest of his day perched at his desk, putting up a good fight against both the growing pile of missives and his pulsing headache.

He considered going to the kitchens to make himself one of Adan's teas. He had found it helped reduce some of the light and sound sensitivity, making it easier to just get through the day. He decided against a trip to the kitchens and opted for sleep instead. He blew out the candles on his desk and began to climb the ladder to his quarters. Once in the loft he began to remove his armour. His fingers found the straps and latches easily after the daily routine. He was down to a pair of thin breeches before climbing into bed, a thin blanket over him. He liked the cold. He could watch the stars before drifting to sleep, and if he had a nightmare the cold calmed his hot skin, slowed his fast breath.

He wished he would just sleep. Just once get a sound, restful sleep. Maybe then he could get more of a grip on his emotions and have the necessary conversation with Ellanora. He couldn't keep this from her much longer. He closed his eyes, tried to keep his mind clear and focused on his breathing. He was not expecting what came next.

He found himself in the main hall. It was empty, unconventionally quiet. Candles lit across the room but a stillness in the air. He walked down the hallway towards the Dragon bone throne, where a dark figure was stationed. "Hello?" he called out. "I thought you'd never come, love. Come here, into the light." He moved closer to the throne, his curiosity had gotten the better of him. The voice sounded familiar, and he soon understood why as he approached and recognized her blue eyes shining in the candle light. "Ella, what are we doing here?" She took his hand in hers and pulled him towards her. "I have something I'd like to give you." Without time to respond she pulled his face down to hers and kissed him passionately. He drew his head back, searching her eyes, confused by the sudden affection. Her hand worked it's way into his hair and pulled him back down to meet her.

She pushed herself into him, wrapping her hands around his neck and his hands found her waist. Her kisses were hard on his lips, conveying her desire. His hands found her tresses and he gave a handful a tiny pull. She pulled her face away from his, with a devious smile on her face. She liked that, he learned. She aggressively pushed him into her throne and the back of his head hit the Dragon bone frame. She put a distance between them, just out of his reach, and tugged her tunic off her shoulders, letting it fall to her feet. Standing before him, with the empty great hall behind her, she stood confidently in only her smallclothes. His breath hitched. Maker, she was beautiful. Her body was thin and muscular. In the candle light he could see some battle scars marking her body. Even her flaws were stunning. His eyes followed her curves, from her hips to her round, modest breasts, to her neck he felt a need to kiss, and finally her eyes. She was staring back at him, her eyes filled with lust, and a smirk on her face. She had taken a step towards the throne and dropped to her knees.

"Maker - Ella what are you doing?"

She began to fumble with the laces of his breeches, her fingers working quickly. She wrapped her hand around his hard cock and smiled at him.

"Cullen, one- call me Nora here, and two -  I love you. Now, shut up."

His eyes drew wide at the statement but he knew a command when he heard one. She took him in her mouth and he gasped audibly. She seemed amused by his pleasure and hummed slightly to herself. She started slow, building him up, twisting her tongue on the tip, and introducing her hands to the base of his cock. His hands moved from the arms of the throne into her hair, pulling back a section gently. She moved quickly, taking him as far as she could, and sucking on the tip. He was hot all over, moaning, hardly containing himself. He opened his eyes to take in the scene. His beloved Inquisitor was kneeling in front of him in the great hall, nearly naked and her hands and tongue working his throbbing cock with enthusiasm. The vision in front of him caused an uproar in his groin, he reacted by pulling on her hair a little tighter, throwing her into her final assault. She must have sensed he was close, and she worked even faster, her hands maintaining a hard grip on him. It didn't take long for Cullen to surrender. He reached for her shoulder, informing her to anticipate his climax. She didn't waver, and he lost control at her eagerness to please him.

He closed his eyes and felt his body buckle at the sweet pleasure, the hot release. She was still before him, licking up what he offered, it turned him on that she wanted every part of him. His cock was sensitive and he flinched at her lips kissing his tip. She wiped her mouth and grinned at Cullen. He pulled her to him, sitting her in his lap, catching his breath. He planted a sweet kiss on her collarbone and she curled up into him.

"Andraste preserve me, there are no words... I don't deserve you...Nora"

He held her in his arms amazed, dumbfounded.

"Cullen..?"

She looked at him, sitting up. He found her eyes, soft and kind - "Yes, love?" Her arms wrapped around his neck once more.

"Shhh." And she kissed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was really *ahem* hard to write.. I hope I did Cullen's filthy mind some justice. 
> 
> I liked the idea that among Ellanora being the inquisitor, herald etc, that (only) between her and Cullen, in their intimate moments she would be referred to as Nora, so that no matter what mask she's wearing they know between them she can be herself.. Something I was trying out, what do you guys think?
> 
> Comments please :)


	13. Better Late Than Never

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bit more drama.. we learn Ella may have some family issues...

Cullen was late to their meeting. Leliana and Josephine joked at what may have been keeping him. Ellanora sat in the corner nursing her hangover induced headache. "Well he wasn't at the tavern last night so you can rule that out." Ella was miserable. Trying to keep up with The Iron Bull was a huge mistake. Dorian had to help her to her quarters last night, she didn't trust herself not to head to Cullen's office in her inebriated state. Luckily Dorian understood and helped his friend into bed, and slept on her couch to ensure she didn't attempt a midnight escape.

She was happy her commander wasn't around to see her at that moment. But of course - as soon as that thought entered her mind, he entered the room. He looked flush, perhaps from the walk from his office. "My apologies, ladies. I promise not to be late again." He kept his gaze down at his feet, seemingly refusing granting eye contact with anyone. Leliana was the first to approach. "Well you two are just absolutely vivacious this morning. Let's discuss the Grey Warden activity." Ellanora groaned audibly and they began business.

As Leliana went on, Ella noticed Cullen was deliberately ignoring her. He had turned his back to where she sat and barely addressed her unless necessary. It nearly drove her mad, so she stood from her seat and made for the other end of the war table, where he would have to face her whether he liked it or not. She noticed when he looked in her direction his eyes diverted quickly to anywhere else. The council went on about conscripting the Grey Wardens, which they all seemed to agree to. Josephine began a new conversation "Excellent, Inquisitor. I will have missives sent out this afternoon to make the arrangements. Speaking of, you have received letters from the Trevalyan estate." Ellanora stirred. "What?!? My.. Family?" Her shock was written all over her face.

Leliana took over "Yes, Ellanora. Looks like your father and sister have each sent you a missive, and your father an additional missive to Josephine, he has some interest in the Inquisition and wants to negotiate aid he can offer. We were planning to respond today." Ella stood, frozen. Cullen saw a look in her eyes akin to fear. "We will not accept anything he offers. Meeting adjurned." She barked and made for the door, letters in hand. Josephine had other ideas. "Inquisitor! We cannot decline an offer from a noble family, especially yours! The game is important and cannot be dismissed. We _must_ accept his offer." Cullen instantly recognized the look in Ella's eyes now- anger.

"Ambassador - I am telling you now and I will not say again, we will not accept a thing he offers. Tell Bann Trevalyan whatever you'd like but we do not need a  _single.fucking.thing_ from the likes of _him_. Dismissed!" Ellanora flung the doors open causing Josephine to flinch.

Cullen wondered what caused such a response but decided it would be best to leave it alone. Josephine was speechless, and Cullen placed his hand on her shoulder, feeling oddly protective of his ambassador. "She needs some time, I'm sure of it." Josephine nodded and retreated back to her office her head hung low. Cullen hung back in the war room, examining the troop placement on the table, trying to get his mind to focus again. His dream had surprised him that morning, but he had slept so well, so soundly he slept much longer than usual, causing him to almost miss his appointment.

He hardly had time to gather his thoughts before running down to the war room. Now it was over before it really began and Ella was upset. He had no idea why and wished he had the ability to comfort her. His headache came on strong again. He knew that feeling well again would only last so long. Truth be told he felt odd not having the headache with him that morning. Grateful, but odd. He released a sigh, gathered his things and headed to his office to finish some work.


	14. Fight In the Courtyard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ella gets some correspondence from her fam-jam and her friends help her out.

Her heart was racing. Ella fled the war room and made quick work of the great hall. She headed to the sparing field. Iron Bull was there encouraging Cassandra to hit him. She didn't bother acknowledging them or wondering what the hell they were doing. She claimed Cassandra's usual reading seat and tore the missive from her sister open first.   
  
_Sister,_  
 _What a strange turn of events. We were surprised to hear of your survival after the events of the conclave, let alone of your new status. The Herald of Andraste - really. I hear you and your little following are situated in the mountains? I'm not much a fan of the cold weather, but I suppose I'll have to accept what I cannot change and pay a visit to your quaint abode. Make arrangements for myself, Darren and Father. We'll let you know when works. Until then, 'Herald.'_  
 _-Alessia_  
  
Ella was already pacing back and forth at the sight of her sister's letter. She would not have them come to Skyhold. She couldn't allow it. Skyhold was her fortress, her sanctuary from the outside, including the Trevelyans. Well, perhaps just the two. She had only really kept in contact while in the circle with her sister in the Chantry, Ruth, and her much older brothers, Andrew and Damien. She was especially close with her twin, Erik. They were connected in a way impossible to describe to any non-twin. Her father and her had never been close, she grew up believing he hated her. He always treated her differently from her siblings and the abuse got worse as years went on. Her older sister had never cared for Ellanora either, nor the other members of the Trevelyan clan, except their father. Alessia was manipulative, entitled and evil. Ella had spent a great deal of time feeling the wrath of Alessia as a child. As sad as she was to leave home for the Circle she felt blessed to be getting away from her dreadful older sister.   
  
Ella decided she would read the letter from her father, Bann Trevelyan. Better to get angry all at once, she thought. She steadied her breath, noting Cassandra and Bull had become aware of her irate behaviour.   
  
_Ellanora,_  
 _I imagine in recent years you've lost sight of your manners and sensibility if you're honestly detaching yourself from your family name and nobility. Turning your back on where you come from is hardly a desired attribute of a leader. I certainly hope this blasphemous proclamation of divinity isn't coming from your tongue - I'm certain the divine wouldn't pick a killer to pass down her wishes. Your inquisition plays a role in Orlais that can benefit your family. I have much to discuss with you. Correspond with Alessia to make arrangements. See you in Skyhold._  
  
Ella's hands were shaking, her knuckles white holding the envelope. She could feel magic on her fingertips humming to her. She wanted to set something ablaze, or send lightning into the sky, pulsing it through her body akin to the anger currently festering. "Boss - come here." The Iron Bull was standing ten paces away from her, Cassandra with him. She held two practise swords in her arms. Ellanora tucked her letters into her boot and stomped to her friends. Her eyes were wild, her cheeks flush and her shoulders raised. Cassandra threw her a sword and Ella wasted no time on her assault.   
  
She dove into Cassandra, catching her off guard. Ella wasn't overly skilled with a sword but they all knew this wouldn't be about skill, this would be about anger. Her friends were granting her release. As she focused on Cassandra, forcing the seeker to defend and stalk backward, Iron Bull shoved a wooden shield into Ella's back. The Mage turned to throw a blow to Bull. He blocked and she spun on her heel to deflect an assault from Cassandra. Ella was beginning to feel better by the gesture of her friends, but was still seething at the words of her family. Bull and Cassandra delivered solid blows and Ella, sick of playing defense, swung her sword aggressively, forcing the fight further into the courtyard. A wide circle of Inquisition soldiers had formed, wondering what was happening.   
  
Cullen heard the commotion before he saw it. Exiting the great hall he saw a large crowd of soldiers and he descended the stairs quickly with his hand on the pommel of his sword. He pushed through his men to the front line, and was shocked at the sight. Bull charged at Ellanora, sweeping his shield into her side and she crashed into the ground, sliding on her back. He went to hit her again from above but she rolled out of the way. She jumped up quickly and was behind him, slamming the flat of her wooden sword against his back, forcing him to stagger to a knee. She kicked Bull in the shoulder to knock him down completely. Cassandra was on her left and struck her sword low, intending to trip Ella. The mage was faster than her opponent and jumped over her swing. Ella took the advantage, knocked Cassandra's sword out of her grasp and tackled her to the ground. The two women rolled onto the grass, laughing and catching their breath. 

The crowd cheered, sharing in the mirth of the women. Ellanora was exhilarated. Her body was tingling, her breathing fast and adrenaline pumping through her. Bull gathered the practise swords on the grass and Cassandra was sitting up, retying a lace from her boot, a smile on her face. Ella sat up, the sun in her eyes, squinting, she made to stand. She stumbled a little, evidently her tackle causing her back need of readjustment. She found a hand on her shoulder, steadying her gently. "Good show, my lady. Are you hurt?" She found amber eyes looking upon her in the sunlight. "No, I'm ..fine. I feel great, actually." She smiled at Cullen sweetly. "You know you're not that bad with a sword, my lady. If you ever wanted to learn more.." He smirked warmly. "Not that bad? My, such a compliment from my commander! Whatever have I done to deserve that?" She flashed Cullen a wide smile before her attention turned to the main tower. "I would love to! ..Learn, that is.. but right now, I must find Josephine. I owe her an apology."

Cullen reached up to pull a twig out of her blonde locks and handed it to the Mage. "The ambassador is in her office. I ..uh, told her you may have needed some time."

"Thanks, Cullen. I should go, I really want to apologize to Josie for my outburst sooner than later" Cullen understood her desire to set things straight and nodded. She jogged over to the stairs before yelling over her shoulder, "Thank you Bull! Thank you Cass! Yer the tits!" Cassandra scowled, Bull beamed and Cullen laughed at the lot.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading so far guys,   
> comments are always appreciated :)


	15. In the Skyhold Garden

After her discussion with Josephine she was still left unsure with how to proceed. Josephine assured Ella they could find a way to decline the Trevalyn's demanding visit, although they both found themselves curious. The pair decided to delay the visit until Leliana could uncover more information on their motives. Ellanora was beginning to tell Josephine why she wanted nothing to do with Alessia and her father when Josephine raised her hand, "a conversation for perhaps another time. I'd prefer your confidence in these matters without you feeling pressed. All is well, Inquisitor." Ella agreed and headed off again, thanking her ambassador for her patience and friendship.

Heading to the garden she found herself utterly embarrassed by her outburst earlier that morning. There was so much she had never said about the past that she was comfortably numb, but now they had planned to come to Skyhold. They had sent Josephine a missive, appealing to her position as ambassador, promptly going over Ellanora's head - perhaps knowing had they not their letters would find themselves useful as kindling for the fire. She didn't mean to have such a strong reaction to the news but the anger just jolted out of her.

She still felt confused. She sat near her herb garden on the grass, running her hands through soil, connecting to the earth. She picked a leaf from her elfroot stalk, bringing it to her face to take in the smell. Earthy with a mint zest. Her mind wandered to her sparing match earlier that afternoon. She had fun, although the worry in her stomach regarding her family remained. She thought about that smile, the heat coming off the hand on her shoulder, causing an internal shudder in her. She knew she shouldn't be thinking of him but she allowed herself to indulge in the hope that him and Cassandra were just a figment of her imagination. It would be nice to have someone to care for her. She knew Blackwall had been recently looking at her  _that_ way.

She found the man honourable, attractive even. But the stir she faced at just the sight of Cullen, the dreams her subconscious conjured in the absence of her own control... Her unrequited love for him was taking up too much of her attention and time to imagine even looking at another man the same way. This thought hurt her. Identifying her love as unrequited left her with a stillness, staring at her garden quietly to herself. She decided quickly she must be productive. She would be in Skyhold a few days waiting for Harrit to finish her armour adjustments and to rest before heading out again. A smile came across Ella's face when she realized what she was going to do. It was something her grandmother taught her; her mother's mother. She grabbed a wicker basket and picked leaves and stems from some of her favourite plants in her garden and made a quick jog to the kitchens grabbing pots and materials for her project.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ella's taking up a hobby to take her mind off of her husky commander...
> 
> I'm posting another one later today, just need to make sure its edited well.


	16. No More Winge-ing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fun with Sera.

It didn't take long to immerse herself in the process. She had been working all day and she felt great. Perhaps better than after sparing. She walked back to the courtyard, wondering if the Commander may be interested in some time in the field. She stopped and looked up at his office, seeing his door closed and no sense of light coming from the window.

"It's real obvious, ya know. You should let Blackwall shag ya to get 'em outta yer system. Maybe he'd stop glaring at ya if ya did."  
Ellanora looked up to see Sera perched on her roof, staring down at her. "What are you doing right now, Sera?" She glared at the elf.   
"Well, I'll tell ya what I'm not doin, I aint pining over some commander stuck-in-the-mud wishing he'd give me a wankin fun time." Ella looked around to confirm the courtyard was empty, and furrowed her brow at her friend. "Sera, let's get a drink, yeah?" Sera jumped off the roof, rolling upon hitting the ground. "Bout friggen time, Quizza!"   
  
They sat in the tavern, sharing a drink at the bar. Sera was going on and on about how depressing things had been. Ella had a hard time following along with Sera's thoughts some times, she was truly all over the place. "I can't have any fun with everybody wingeing" Before Ella knew it she heard the words coming out of her own mouth "What did you have in mind?" Shit. This couldn't be good. Ella realized whatever they were about to do was worth it to hear Sera giggle like that. They downed their drinks and began their escapades. First, they went to find Cole. Ellanora had told Sera how Josephine had jumped at the sight of the kid, harbouring an idea in Sera. "Cole, Josephine is too much of a prissypants to admit, she needs help.. she needs you around, throughout the day to pop up and be like, how're you? Ya dig? She's real busy though so just, come around every once in a while, give 'er some space and then -just to remind her yer there for her and all that, be like, hey - here I am" Ella laughed at this, knowing it was the lesser of Sera's other plans. They had him convinced to visit Josephine sporadically throughout the day.   
  
Mission complete, they headed back to the bar for another round. "I have an idea, Sera. But it will involve quite abit of stealth." Sera was already foaming at the mouth. She chugged her ale, grabbed Ella's hand and yelled wildly, "LETS GO!" Before running out of the bar Ella could hear Krem yell "What's gotten into you two?" The girls laughed in the courtyard on their way to Dorian's quarters.

"Okay seriously, we're going to have to be smart about this one, Sera." Sera took watch of the battlements while Ella snuck into Dorian's room. She knew he was in the tower with Bull tonight, 'reading.' However, she didn't know how long that would keep him, or Bull for that matter. She ran to Dorian's dresser, grabbing his small clothes in a bundle. They ran toward the Tavern, to bull's quarters above. She  placed Dorian's small clothes in Bull's drawer while Sera took Bull's clothes. They snuck back to Dorian's to make the switch. They ran back along the battlements and found themselves in front of Cullen's office. They stopped to laugh, nearly falling over at the image of Dorian pulling on Bull's undies, and vice versa. Ella knew it was incredibly foolish but today she needed to laugh, to have fun and be a little naughty. She rested her hands on her knees as she hunched over giggling like a school girl.

"I knew you were different!" Sera belted, wiping the tears from her eyes. "How's about one more.. I'm sure we could easily get into General Uptight's office.." Ellanora suddenly felt a little uncomfortable. "No, I think we should call it a night. Gather some ideas for next time." Sera's face lit up "Next time? Brilliant, Quizza! It was fun chasing you, Ella. Nice view. The general's crazy if he don't see it. 'Specially in them breeches." Sera offered a salute and leaped down from the battlements off to the Tavern, leaving Ella a little buzzed, standing before Cullen's door. She knew she had no reason to bother him, let alone a reason late in the evening. But it would be so easy, to just knock... She proceeded to create an odd dance. One step towards the door, two backwards, twirling the ends of her hair in between her fingers, deciding what to do, and repeating. The 11th bell sounded and it woke her into a decision. She began to descend the stairs from the battlements, towards the main hall. Exhaling a deep sigh on her way.


	17. Soap Shop

Cullen had an early rise that morning. His nightmares returning, he awoke drenched in sweat, hands shaking. He knew the lyrium was teasing him now. This would all go away with just a taste. He got dressed and descended the ladder to his office. He decided to a walk may do him some good. He perused the battlements, passed the stables and Dennit, nodding to the man, and headed to the garden. His headache was returning and he revelled in the last few moments before the unsought of pain. He headed to the kitchens to make himself one of Adan's helpful teas before starting the long day ahead. He had begun the process of picking which soldiers would accompany the inquisition to the Winter Palace. He was to assess their skills in battle and stealth. He headed down the steps and opened the kitchen door, startled, he found Ella peering over several trays, and wearing - unbelievably, an apron. He smiled at the adorable imagery. 

"What are you doing down here, Ellanora? You _are_ aware we do have kitchen staff?"

She jumped at his voice and turned towards him, taking a relaxing breath before her retort  " I am aware, thank you, _kind commander_. I have an arrangement with said staff, actually."

He hadn't missed her teasing tone and carried on with his own mix of jest and curiousity. "Do tell, _mysterious Inquisitor_."  
She sighed, realizing she had to give up her secret "Well I recently set myself up here, I'm - it's kind of silly, but I'm making soap."

Cullen stood there not sure what to say but kept up the theme of mirth ".. _soap?"_

  
Ella laughed outright at the silly look on his face. "Well.. yeah! I was in the garden the other day and realized I have all these herbs, and .. well, I thought it couldn't hurt to be productive while I'm here.."

  
He appeared to gather his thoughts again. "Where on earth did you learn to make.. _soap?"_

  
"My grandmother. My mother's mother. She thought it was important to pass on knowledge or skills to each of us Trevalyn's. "

  
Cullen couldn't suppress a teasing smile. "And so she passed you knowledge.. of soap." 

  
Ellanora laughed earnestly, staring into his eyes.  "Really Cullen. YES! Yes, her knowledge of soap! I told you it's silly. But it relaxes me, and reminds me of when I was younger, eager to learn whatever grandmother would offer to teach me." 

He leaned his back against the counter, still appearing quite tall. He put his hands up in front of his chest, palms out, surrendering. "Alright I'll stop goading you. It occurs to me I don't know much of your up bringing... So tell me, what was it like growing up with six siblings?"  
Ella had taken out a large knife and was cutting a slab of soap into squares. "Honestly? Loud."

The two shared a smile. Cullen picked up a square, raised it to his nose to smell it. Lemongrass.

"What do they all do now?"Ella smiled at Cullen's sudden interest in her soap and in her family.

"Well, my brothers Andrew and Damien are much older than myself. Andrew owns a tavern and keep in the free marches and Damien is a Templar, in Hasmal.  Next down the line is Ruth, a sister of the chantry in Val Royeaux last I'd heard.  Erik, my twin is a researcher and archivist at the University of Orlais."

He had been counting on his finger while she spoke. "Well, thats four.."

Ella exhaled a heavy breath. "Alessia makes five. She's.. something else. She's married to a rich noble who runs the Trevalyn estate with Father. Alessia takes care of fathers affairs. What that entails I couldn't even tell you. Alessia and I never got along."

Cullen frowned. This seemed a difficult subject all of a sudden. "Sister's rarely have a completely amicable relationship, in my experience" he thought of Mia.

  
Without really thinking Ella blurted out, "Emily and I always did. Alessia is different. Alessia was a bully. Abusive and manipulative. She is capable of alot. Her and Father share that trait."

  
Cullen followed her impulsive leap of conversation, "Emily?" 

Ellanora continued to cut slabs. "Emily is. ..was my sister. She was just slightly older than Erik and I. She died when we were quite young." Cullen swallowed. How had he not known this before? He felt terrible for bringing up the subject. He offered apologies and Ella waved her hand at him. He decided to steer the conversation to a lighter note, "So are you particularly close with any of your family?" 

  
She seemed to appreciate the change. "Yes, my twin - Erik. We were very close growing up. He always got himself into trouble for helping me. He visited me in Ostwick once, permitted after my harrowing. We would send eachother books with scribbles written under the print with our own created stories and fairy tales. He sent me a letter recently, actually. I've been meaning to respond. I'm sure he'd love to hear about Alessia and Father's plans to visit Skyhold."

  
Cullen had busied himself boiling water for his tea. ".. Is that what they requested in the missives?" 

  
"HA! _Requested?_ ? I don't believe either understand that word, Commander. No, they insisted I make arrangements. Declared themselves surprised I survived the Conclave. Not pleased nor relieved, but surprised! 'Don't turn your back on your family Ellanora, you're not the herald, Ellanora, you're just a good for nothing killer!' " She mocked the missive in her best impression of her father. 

  
Cullen furrowed his brow and rubbed the back of his neck, nervously. "Surely your Father understands death is involved in war, and what we are up against. Why call you a killer?" 

  
She looked to her feet at that question. "Oh, well that has nothing to do with the Inquisition, actually. Um, my mother died giving birth to me. Hense, _'killer.'_ "

  
Cullen didn't know what to say, he chose his words carefully "Well, I'm sorry to hear that.. and Ella, you know that..." 

  
"I know. _I_ know it's not my fault. Needless to say my relationship with Bann Trevalyn is an estranged one." 

  
A longer than anticipated silence bore into the room. Ellanora  glanced at her feet before speaking, "Cullen, I didn't mean for this conversation to get so.. depressing. These soaps have quite some time to cure.. Did you.. Would you like to have breakfast? .. With me?" Her cheeks reddened at the question and she instantly felt foolish. 

  
"I..I have alot to do today, my lady. But perhaps.. supper, later?" 

  
A smile returned to her face after Cullen's stuttering and stammering. "Yes, that sounds lovely. I'll see you in the great hall at the seventh bell?"

  
"Sure, Ellanora. Perhaps in the meantime, write to your brother."  She stood straight to salute her Commander. "Yes ser" And turned on her heel to leave the room.

He laughed at her exit and returned to his tea. He had a grin on his face he felt difficult to conceal for the remainder of the day. He knew it silly but he was pleased; he was to have dinner with her. As his smile grew his headache wained. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guyyyyyyssssss, they're gonna have dinner :)


	18. Preparations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there's one more chapter before they have dinner, because I have to keep you guys on your toes! I'll be editing and posting later today though so yay!

Ella spent the day writing her brother in Orlais. Sharing with him the details of Alessia and their father's missive. She begged him to visit while they were here, perhaps to help absorb some of the awful. She told him of her plans to visit The Exalted Plains in the morrow, having heard Harritt had finished her armour modifications. After tying the missive to a raven she headed back to her quarters. She wanted to enjoy a bath before her venture forth stole that basic luxury from her. Besides, she wanted to try out a bar of her creation ; Lavendar Mint. Her chamber room filled with the scent, sweet and earthy with the subtle spearmint. She lowered herself into the bath, titling her head back to soak her long tresses.

She thought about that morning. How easy the conversation with Cullen was, despite the occasional stutter or awkward hitch in tone. Talking about the Trevalyans was never an easy subject. Maker, she had told him of Emily! She hadn't told him much but more than most knew of her older, lost sister. Why was it so easy to trust him so quickly, to talk without considering which mask she was wearing. If she were Ellanora or the Inquisitor in that moment, it didn't seem to matter around him. She submerged herself completely under the bath water before getting out and drying off. She headed to her closet already aware of what it contained, light tan tunics and breeches, armour, light armour pads, and sleep clothes. She knew the dinner with her commander was just that - dinner. But she had an out of the blue desire to be pretty today. 

She thought back to before the Circle, all the elaborate pretty dresses she was forced to wear. All the pretty dresses she ruined from playing in the mud with Erik. She wished she had just a simple dress. Ellanora wasn't overly girly, she preferred pants to skirts, and almost always wore her hair in a nest of braids upon her head, allowing stray strands to fall by her temples. She decided tonight, since she didn't have a simple dress as desired, she would instead let her hair down. She sat at her desk and brushed her long blonde hair out, and formed a couple small braids in her long ends, randomly throughout her hair. She buttoned up her tunic, leaving the collar undone and poured a small glass of wine to calm her nerves before the seventh bell.

\------------------------------------------

Cullen was already wandering the great hall. He didn't like this waiting thing. He found himself nervous, it was silly, they were just breaking bread. Two friends sharing a meal. There was no reason for him to be pacing the hall, raising his eyes to her quarters door at every other moment.

"Curly, come sit down, you look like a blind mabari pacing like that! Have a glass. She'll be down in a minute for Maker's sake!" Varric was sitting in his usual spot, wearing glasses and writing missives.

Cullen turned to the dwarf, baffled. Varric seemed to read his mind before he could ask. "It's obvious you two are meeting for something, you keep staring at her door. You know what they say, 'a watched pot never boils' or, 'burns'.. Wait.. Ah, shit, you know what I'm saying. Sit down." 

Cullen obeyed, sitting across from the rogue putting his back to her quarters. He took the glass of wine offered and downed it in one big gulp. Varric hadn't been looking but Cullen knew he had noticed it.

"If it makes you feel better I bet she's just as nervous."

Cullen turned his attention to Varric. His face full of obvious confusion. Varric just laughed and waved his hand at the man, shooing him in the direction of her quarters. Cullen turned his attention and found Ellanora closing the door behind her. She smiled shyly when she found his gaze and began to approach him.

Cullen stood and walked to meet her, his gaze remaining on her the entire time. Her hair.. It was down.. He hadn't realized how long it was before. Her braids hid the length, he realized. She was exquisite. He had never noticed before how her casual tunic fit her body, accentuated her curves. With her hair down she looked effortlessly 'done up.' 

He took a deep breath, taking in the sight of her. As he approached her he reminded himself he couldn't just kiss her then and there, like he wanted to. He had to maintain some sense of self control. He knew he would be kidding himself but he would have to at least try.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo in my head, Skyhold has another door between the undercroft and Solas's place where there's like a huge mess hall to eat. Picture it however you'd like yourself but the room must exist for the story so conjure your imaginations hahaha. 
> 
> Is there an actual area like this in Skyhold that I have completely missed when I played the game? Anywhooo, dinnaaahhhh is nearly served ;)


	19. A Dinner, Interupted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised a dinner.......

"Good evening, Commander. Shall we?" She gestured towards the dining hall, and all he could muster was a nod and the clearing of his throat. She lead them to a bench on the far side of the wall, he assumed so they wouldn't be disturbed. As soon as they sat, a helper had brought over a bottle of wine and two glasses. Ellanora had obviously prepared for this. 

Saying his thanks to the helper he poured a glass for Ella and one for himself. Setting the bottle down he realized he hadn't an idea on what to say. She saved him the trouble quickly. "I wrote to Erik today, as you suggested."

"Oh? Decided to inform him of your families intentions to visit, then?"

She huffed a quick breath and took a sip from her wine. "I asked him to come here when.. If.. They come to Skyhold. I'll need all the help I can get."

"Hopefully that can be arranged. I must admit, it would be interesting to meet your twin, and hear all about a young noble Ellanora. What she got up to aside from making soap with grandmother." He smirked at her across the table.

She felt like throwing the table away from them and kissing that ridiculous smirk off of his face. "Oh I was a trouble maker, I assure you."

Cullen leaned in closer to her, speaking almost a whisper, "I'll believe it when I see it."

Ellanora's face was flush, and she had to remind herself to reset her jaw, hide her surprise at his flirtation. She hadn't an idea how to respond, so she took up her glass and had a sip.

"Lady Trevelyan, have I made you blush?" She rolled her eyes at the notion. Setting down her glass she put on a serious face as if to retort smugly, but caught his eyes and the two burst out into laughter. It was an easy laugh, without reservations. She felt the nervousness fade and was suddenly very comfortable. It was a feeling as if she had known Cullen for years, he still emitted a feeling of safety, but there was an added element, a closeness she could not describe.

The same helper from earlier came to the table delivering two plates of dinner; nothing lavish, a dish common to Skyhold. An equal balance of starch, protein and vegetables. Ellanora realized she had forgotten how hungry she was in the moment with Cullen, and was very pleased she had pre-arranged this setup. They both began to eat dinner, discussing his recent work with his soldiers and finally leading up to her next venture.

"So I understand you are leaving tomorrow for the Exalted Plains?" The worry had returned to his brow as he sipped his wine.

"Yes, Harritt has completed my armour adjustments so we will head out tomorrow morning. It should please you that Harritt took your recommendations. Replacing thicker fabric for lighter metals. It seems my defenses will be upgraded, so to speak."

He thought back to her broken body after Haven, bruises and cuts covering most of her skin. He was alright with admitting this news did, in fact, please him. "The Exalted Plains sound like a nightmare, I am glad Harritt has made the necessary adjustments. There is much to do, Inquisitor." He wanted to tell her how he hoped she would never be hurt, or feel pain. How he wished he could protect her from everything and anything. How he would gladly lay down his life knowing it meant her survival, her happiness.

"Returning to our formal terms then, Commander?" She chuckled under her breath, amazed at how as quickly as it was on, it was off. One mask one moment, another the next. She supposed she should get used to it. There was much demanded of her, she needed to remember who to be at each passing moment.

"I'm.. I'm sorry, I meant to say.. " He cleared his throat, "I just want to see your safe return to Skyhold."

She met his eyes, accepting his apology silently. "I'm almost surprised at how far we've come, if I'm being honest. I never expected any of this to happen... let alone to me. It's scary, really. What is expected, what's coming. I feel like even after everything we accomplish, there's still another big ominous task ahead, without any solid information or guarantees. It's like my life has literally gone to chance. Wrong place, wrong time. And now I'm here, surrounded by so many people looking up at me like I'm this... thing greater than myself. And I'm just like, well, I guess this is happening.. let's see what we have."

She exhaled and took a sip of her wine. She suddenly felt bashful of her confession. She probably shouldn't have said anything. She stared at her plate, picking at food with her fork. She recalled her Father's voice barking at her not to play with her food and she instantly sat up straighter and set down her utensil.

"Ellanora, you've done so much already. We've come so far.. Although this.. leadership is new to you, you must know I have the utmost respect for you and the choices you have---"

"Well, well, well, what have we here?" Bull's voice boomed through the hall, causing inquisition soldiers to pay sudden attention to their Commander and Inquisitor having dinner. Cullen saw Ellanora roll her eyes before turning his attention to the Qunari. "Hey Boss. Cullen, I hardly ever see you out of your office, and now here you are in the dining hall." Cullen opened his mouth to speak, but Dorian interjected. "That's not true, Bull. He spends a great deal of time also in the sparing fields, teaching his men the importance of distraction, as he fights without a shirt on."

"An effective practice," Ellanora chimed in, then blushed and laughed, pretending to be in on Dorian's jest. Cullen sat back in the bench, crossing his arms and readying himself for the assumed slow, comedic, inappropriate assault that would be The Iron Bull and Dorian. 

"Hey, leave him alone.." Cullen heard Varric approaching. "It's his only move.." Varric chuckled the second Cullen shot him a glare.

"I don't see the big deal. That kind wouldn't distract me. Now, a set of lady bits, maybe.." Sera settled beside Cullen on the bench, he was completely unfazed at her encroachment. She picked up his plate and set it in her lap. Apparently Cullen was done with dinner.

He locked eyes with Ellanora. She was smiling, almost in disbelief of her team's timing. She shrugged her shoulders slightly before jumping at Cole's immediate presence. Cullen laughed at her jolt.

"With every advance, muscles building.. flexing, proving their dexterity.. watching intently, not to miss a strike. Trained well, pushing forward ambitiously. Skin glistening in sun.. Watching from above, admiring the speed and force. Wondering what it would be like to.."

Ellanora was floored. What had Cole just done? She glanced at Dorian, who understood her friend and chimed in, "Yes, I must admit the best view is from the balcony.. Honestly, Cullen, you do deliver quite a show."

Ellanora smiled at Dorian, thanking him for the save. She caught Cullen blushing across from her.

"Distraction is a shady tactic. Relying on such lacks skill." Blackwall stated and sat down promptly. He was brooding. It seemed everyone found the statement a little ill-fit.

Ella spoke up, "You all can leave my Commander alone, now, thank you. Now, we were just finishing dinne--"

Sera stood up quickly and slammed her hands down on the table. "To the tavern!!" Ella jumped at the gesture and exhaled. "No, we are going to the Exalted Plains tomorrow morning and the Tavern is the last thing--"

"Oh really darling. Come on. Yes we'll do this whole saving the world bullshit tomorrow but tonight, let's just have at it." Dorian pushed an elbow into her arm, declaring his insistence. Bull stood up, pushed Ella's bench chair back and picked her up, throwing her over his shoulder.

"Bull, you put me down this instance or I swear I'll open a rift just to throw you in it!"

Bull smacked her ass and laughed. "Boss, come off it. I can tell when you're bluffing."


	20. Herald's Rest

Bull finally set her down at the entrance to Herald's Rest. She just about fell over from the instant rush of blood to her head. She looked around. Dorian, Sera, Varric, Bull, Cole was surely around somewhere, Blackwall grinning at her... Where was Cullen? She took a step outside the bar, scanning the area. She saw a figure heading to the stairs. "Cullen! ..Where are you going?"

The figure stopped and turned to her. "The tavern is a place my men can go to relax without their Commander being present ruining it for them. Besides, you've got your whole party with you. I think I'll just retire."

She took slow steps towards him, calming her breath as she did. "Cullen, I'm sorry the evening was interrupted. Our friends are eccentric."

He responded far quicker than he intended. " _Your_ friends, Ellanora."

She frowned and took a step toward him. "Well, let's change that." She grabbed his wrist and pulled him toward the tavern. He pulled his arm out of her grasp and stood firm in place. She turned and stepped even closer than before.

He could smell a sweet earthy note as she stood before him. It was intoxicating. She nearly whispered to him, "You want to trust I'll come home to Skyhold safe... get to know those I face combat with. You are my Commander of forces. Consider them your forces. Come on." She took his hand.

He understood. Although he found himself stuck on the words 'You are _my_ commander.' He followed her into the tavern, letting go of her hand the moment they entered.

He expected a full bar, instead it was a quiet night. The lot filled a table near the back. "One drink, guys. Then I must retire." Ellanora declared.

The group laughed and Blackwall held a chair out for her beside him. "My lady." Ellanora took the seat and scoffed, "Enough with this 'lady' business!" Cullen sat across from Ella, beside Dorian. Sera giggled at the head of the table. "Lady business- haha!"

Cabot brought over several mugs of frothy mead and set them down on the table. "So Cullen, care to partake in a friendly wager?" Iron Bull raised an eyebrow in the Commander's direction. Varric had already taken out his little black book as Ella silently shook her head at Cullen.

Cullen laughed dryly. "I think I have seen Ellanora the morning after your _'friendly'_ drink off. I'll have to pass. Besides, aren't you heading out tomorrow morning?"

Bull, Dorian and Sera shared a laugh. "Alcohol affects Qunari a little differently, we don't get hangovers. But yes, myself, Dorian, Varric, Blackwall and our little magelet are heading out tomorrow. Although I can't say our Inquisitor is too pleased about it."

The party's attention focused on Ellanora as she was mid swig of her beer. She set her mug down and defensively spoke her point. "The whole blighted trip is giving me the willies. Dead things should just stay dead." Cullen laughed earnestly at her adorable admission. Dorian winked at Ellanora before speaking, "What's the fun in that?"

The group got louder and the night got longer. Cabot brought more and more rounds to the tables. Iron Bull and Dorian were quizzing Cullen on where he grew up, his family and what it was like in the Order. Cullen seemed to be getting more comfortable with the group, and he shared a lighthearted tidbit from his Templar days. The group was enjoying Cullen's true personality peaking out from behind his formal role. Then Dorian, with a serious tone, asked Cullen what happened in Kinloch and Kirkwall.

Ellanora jumped in to change the subject before Cullen could respond. "Dorian, I've been meaning to ask, have you settled into your quarters in Skyhold well?" She remembered how Cullen had deflected when she asked him herself in Haven. Cullen nodded at Ella in appreciation. 

Dorian turned to Sera and Ella. "Ah, yes. Thank you for reminding me. Did you two have fun the other night then?" Sera spit ale out of her mouth and onto the table before her. She nearly fell over laughing and Iron Bull pulled her into a headlock, rubbing her hair softly with his knuckle. Ellanora's face went still. Determined to remain calm, she picked up her mug and declared, "Whatever are you talking about, darling?"

"Oh piss-off Inquisitor. You know exactly what I'm talking about! And it was not that funny."

Bull spoke up, "It was a little funny. I enjoyed the show." 

Cullen implored that someone tell them what happened, what had the Inquisitor and Sera gotten into. Dorian explained the small clothes switch and Sera went on to tell the group of the prank involving Cole and their Ambassador. Cullen shot Ella a curious look and she put her hands up in defence, "Sera wanted to trip wire her office door with a sluge bucket! Cole was a safer alternative!"

The group laughed at the expense of both parties and Blackwall raised a glass to Ellanora. He turned to her and declared, "I have to say Lady, you're unlike any woman I've ever met."

Ellanora blushed and looked away from the man. She was happy Dorian's berating of Sera's immaturity had taken to a higher volume. Her happiness was shortlived, when Dorian turned his attention to Ella. "And you - you're supposed to be a leader for Andraste's sake. Stay out of my drawers sweetheart - or I'll go through yours!" Ella threw her head back and laughed at the imagery, and imagined Dorian incapable of even touching her feminine articles.

The conversation carried on in a new direction and setting down her mug she noticed Cullen had left the table. She swung her head around to see him retreating for the door. She sat up, wishing her friends a good night and before they could convince her to have another drink, she was on her way to the door. Blackwall had stood up from his seat at her departure and Ella overhead Sera behind her in a stern voice, "Down, boy." She thanked Sera in her head as she exited the Tavern.

In the courtyard she saw her Commander once again retreating to his quarters. She felt bad that their evening had turned into a drinking night with friends in the Tavern. She was determined to at least say goodnight to him.

"Cullen?" He turned at her voice. "Did you want to.. walk for abit?"

He started walking towards her and into the light. He had a small grin on his face before ushering with his arm for her to lead the way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhoh .. Cullen's jealy


	21. Jealousy and Goodnight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait on this guys, it's been a looooooong work week.

Cullen and Ellanora walked silently towards the garden. His mind was racing with different thoughts. He felt foolish, he had been looking so forward to their dinner, he was blinded by his eagerness, by his feelings. He hadn't even noticed that her and Blackwall were an item. Sitting beside him in the Tavern, what he had said to her.. Maker - he had stolen the words out of Cullen's mouth. The blush that spread across her freckled cheeks. Of course. He felt a surge of jealousy, a twinge of envy. And that lucky man would be going to the Exalted Plains with her tomorrow. It was all so obvious all of a sudden. Why wouldn't she want him there with her, when she verbalized her fears earlier. He would be there to keep her safe, keep her warm in her tent. At the image of her in his arms he nearly stormed off to his office in that moment.

As if sensing it, she asked, "something bothering you, Cullen?" He focused his breath and face to remain calm. In the dark of night he doubted she could see his expression but he willed it to change. "Yes, Herald. Just a headache." At least he wasn't lying.

"Call me Ella, please."

"Ah, sorry.. I. ." He brought his hand to rub the back of his neck. Trying to relieve some of the tension surging through his body from his withdrawals and his rage. They continued to head towards the garden, she found a seat on a bench and beckoned Cullen to join her. The moon was bright and lit the garden with a blue glow. As Cullen sat next to her, he noticed her eyes beaming at his.

"Cullen, I'm sorry tonight turned into a night at the Tavern. I think I got a little caught up with our friends and didn't realize I had breached plans."

Is that why she thought he was upset? Maker, he had actually enjoyed himself at the Tavern. He enjoyed Dorian and Ella's sarcastic banter, and seeing Iron Bull's interaction with Sera reminded of him with his own siblings, it was endearing. He had been having fun until Blackwall opened his mouth and opened Cullen's eyes to what was going on. "It's quite alright Ella, I uh.. I had fun, actually. It's just getting late."

"I.. yes. I had honestly only intended to have a brief chat. Dorian certainly had much to say and much to drink. Iron Bull only gets affectionate like he was with Sera when he's had quite a few. And Varric? It's like he's studying everyone or something. He gets so quiet sometimes."

Cullen couldn't stop himself, the words were already out. "Blackwall seems to have the opposite reaction to Varric's"

Even in the moonlight Cullen could see Ella blush. She brushed her long hair off her shoulder and Cullen took in her scent once more. Something sweet.. what was that damned scent? She laughed shyly. "Yeah, I didn't expect that. I don't really know what's going on there. It's very sweet, but .. I'm .. I'm not interested. I fear I may have to talk to him about it but I've been hoping it would just.. dissipate itself."

Cullen's heart rate had increased and he found himself focusing all of his energy into suppressing a smile. It was like a wave had crashed over him, he felt relieved and giddy. He once again calmed his tone, "Oh?" was all he could muster.

"It's funny, Cullen.. I can throw myself into fighting demons, closing rifts.."

"--Don't forget about hunting Dragons." He smirked and encouraged her to go on.

"ha, yes I suppose that is added to the list now.. I can be in all these dangerous, scary situations and I would still rather any one of those to having to tell someone I don't care for them, in that way.." She paused momentarily before continuing, "I think I fear that same rejection so I am terrified to deal it out. Does that make sense?" She was busy picking at her fingers while delivering her rant. He noted this a nervous habit of hers, perhaps.

"Uh, yes. It does actually. But I think that it makes you humble." He leaned back into the bench, relaxing abit. They sat in silence for some time. Cullen would occasionally point out constellations in the night's sky and Ella would lean in a little closer to follow where he would point, connecting the dots. He showed her every constellation he knew of, and damned his memory for not knowing more, so she could remain close to him. Between the heat he could feel radiating off of her, and the glow her skin had from the moon's cast, it took everything he had not to kiss her right then and there.

After some time admiring the stars, Cullen walked Ellanora back to her quarters. He knew he was incapable of looking at her throne without turning beet red, so he kept his eyes on her as they walked the great hall.

They stopped at the door, and she turned to address him. "Well Commander, I suppose I will see you in a few week's time."

He took her hand in his, kissed the back of her hand, smirking. "Stay safe out there, Ellanora. Perhaps when you return we can have that training match." He raised an eyebrow and released her hand.

Her eyes grew wide at his kiss. The heat, the softness of his touch. He was so confident, so brazen. Standing in front of her quarters she fought the impulse to throw him in her doorway and kiss him against the back side of the door, hidden from view. She felt her heart racing and her knees shakey. She could do nothing but smile and declare in her most delphic tone, "Perhaps."

He smiled at her softly and began to walk away, and she turned to her door. She exhaled heavily before turning the doorknob.

"Oh, and Ella?" She turned and saw Cullen walking away, addressing her over his shoulder. "Do go easy on the poor man, can't blame him for his good taste."

Ella fell into her door, closed it behind her and nearly squealed in excitement.

Unbeknown to either of them, they shared a moment under each of their breath.

"Maker preserve me" echoed in the great hall and behind her locked door.


	22. Exalted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another one this week for you guys.  
> Thanks so much for reading and commenting, it's appreciated :)

After a week of killing darkspawn and arcane horrors, Ella was anxious to return to Skyhold. Although she did appreciate the warmer climate. Her shoulders and cheeks were glowing with a mild tan and new freckles had spattered her nose and forehead. She  was able to shed some layers under her armour and the warm sun reminded her of being home again. She didn't have an overflow of happy memories at the Trevalyan estate but the smell and feel of warm summer wasn't something she experienced at the Circle. Now, she was taking in every nostalgic breath of the fresh greenery near the Dalish Camp.

She had been thinking about Cullen since her party departed Skyhold. It seemed impossible to get him or that devilish smirk off of her mind. How he had been so brazen, how his eyes bore into her with such intensity. She sighed at her thoughts, knowing them to be trouble

In the last week, Ella and her team had the wretched task of burning corpses afflicted by dark magics, and searching for fallen soldier's final resting words. It had been daunting and morbid to process. So when they found a Dalish camp and were asked to find an unharmed golden Halla, Ella was more than happy to assist. Varric, Bull and Blackwall watched as Dorian and Ella chased the poor animal, setting up blocking barriers to attempt to guide it back to the camp, laughing and screaming the whole time. This was fun, for a change. 

Dorian slipped and fell in a pool of mud, much to the group's enjoyment. Ella turned and laughed at her friend, amused at the irritation on his face.

"Darling, I know you said mud baths are good for the skin but really.."

Dorian attempted to clean a large spread of mud from his chin, only to apply more to his cheek. He huffed and Ella laughed. She walked over to him and extended her hand to help him up. 

In a second he yanked her down to him, and tripped her front leg, successfully throwing her into the mud pile. 

"Oh but sweetheart you really must try it!! It's absolutely divine!"

He gathered a palm of mud and flung it toward her face. She turned in the knick of time and it landed in her blonde side braid instead.

The two mages laughed and squealed throwing eachother into the mud, and throwing mud at eachother. They giggled like children as the rest of the party approached.

Varric held Bianca tenderly and remarked, "Come now kiddies, the adults have got work to do."

At his words Ella lunged at Varric trying to drag him into the mud. Varric side stepped and chuckled smugly.

Blackwall laughed at the two and stared adoringly at Ella, much to her discomfort. She flashed an awkward smile to the man.

"Ah, let em have a little fun. This trip has been fucking depressing. Besides, _I'm_ enjoying the show. Keep fighting, and feel free to lose some layers."

The mud made a loud "smack" sound when it made contact from Dorian's palm to Iron Bull's face. Bull wiped his nose and cheek with the back of his hand before sighing, "Fair enough." 

 

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The party returned to camp in higher spirits. Dorian and Bull headed off together to the stream, and Ella sat by the fire pit to offer them some privacy. Bianca's firing mechanism had been acting up and Varric was miserable trying to work on her constantly, much to no avail. That left Blackwall sitting across from her. 

They maintained an interesting conversation, Ella found herself learning more about the Grey Warden's and the blight the more they spoke. He had become more and more flirtatious and Ella had felt his eyes on her throughout the day. It had made her feel uncomfortable and distracted. She knew he, as her friend, deserved a truthful conversation, but she could hardly form the words. 

"Inquisitor, I wanted to thank you for bringing me on this mission, and entertaining my ramblings on Grey Wardens. I'm flattered you'd spend any time with me. I.. Enjoy your company. Now, we should grab some dinner before I get too carried away."

His words were kind and the man was no doubt charming, but chemistry isn't something you can fake. Ella was drawn to another and no matter how unlikely the chances, she had to honour her feelings. Blackwall stood up and walked to a waiting bowl, leaving Ella with her thoughts. 

She told herself she could have that conversation tomorrow. Ella wanted nothing more than some food, a bath and some sleep. She knew the food wouldn't be anything close to the food prepared in Skyhold's kitchens. Nor would the stream offer the same warmth and relaxation her tub at home did. As far as sleep, she had been lucky to manage a few hours each night. Every night she dreamt of the same. Finding those men and women, the look upon their faces in their final moments. Then they'd change to the scorched faces at the Temple of Sacred Ashes. Then once more into the faces in Haven. She had woken up at the same point in the dream each night. Shaken, sweating and out of breath. She jolted from bed the moment their faces turn into Cullen's.


	23. That's An Order

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually managed to have a day off this week so I'm posting an additional chapter for you guys..  
> Thanks for reading!! Comment with your thoughts :)

They had successfully recruited Loranil to the Inquisition and were on route to Fort Revasan to deliver the soldier's letters. Varric insisted he could fix Bianca in a matter of moments. He insisted this every passing hour as he worked away. Ella was eager to put this task to rest and head back to Skyhold. It wasn't too far of a treck, they could be done in a few hours and back in time for drinks. The idea that they could leave tomorrow morning for home had Ella too impatient to wait for Varric and Bianca. Ella would continue on with Blackwall, Dorian and Iron Bull and Varric would stay at base camp with his work.

They were all eager to return home so they made quick work of the terrain. They arrived at Fort Revasan and jumped right into a battle to seal a rift stationed outside the Fort's giant doors. Ella and her party had a practised approach to most rifts and usually fell back into that battle formation. Dorian stood at a distance, casting barriers and imprisoning demons in pools of lightning. The Iron Bull ran ahead charging into demons tearing them limb for limb while keeping an eye on the barrier around him, occasionally backing off to allow for another cast. Blackwall would fight alongside Bull and would shield Ella only when she left herself open close the rift. Ella was careful with her spells, not to use too much mana, reserving strength for closing the rift. 

During this fight, however, Blackwall was too close to Ella, she couldn't see past him. She was casting around him and creating distance between her and the Warden, but he would quickly close it. She found herself climbing on a wooden box to stand above him, casting ahead. He had remained too close to her and left Iron Bull to face much of the combat. The Iron Bull was a magnificent fighter, but the formation was successful time and time again by having two warriors at the heart of it.

"Blackwall, go help Bull! Now!"

Ella glanced quickly at Dorian who was using extra mana to cast more barriers around Bull.

"No, my lady, you are mine to protect!" He yelled as he stabbed his sword into the chest of a demon.

Ella huffed in anger, this had gone on long enough. Her focus drew to Bull, where she saw a Rage Demon heading towards his flank. She froze the demon in place with an ice cast, and moved closer to the battle. She hit the frozen demon with the blade on the end of her staff several times while she had the advantage.

Blackwall returned to standing infront of her and continued to shield her from the battle, She stepped around him to cast but still found him ushering her away from the scene. Seeing Bull overwhelmed again she screamed at Blackwall to action.

"Help.Bull.NOW!"

It was too late, the arrow had flown. It hit just under Bull's breastplate, on his left side, near his heart. It didn't look too deep but in the middle of this battle who could tell.

"Bull! No!" Ella pushed Blackwall with all her mite and charged towards Bull. "Dorian - barriers!" She steadied Bull down to the ground and felt the cool calm of the barrier laying in place. Ella wasn't too skilled with healing but she was an expert to Dorian's novice. She knew to pull out the arrow, apply pressure to the wound and try to seal the skin and encourage healing with her magic. If the arrow had pierced an organ, she knew her magic would be limited.

"Sorry Boss" he declared almost in a grunt. Ella gripped the arrow and steadied her eyes on him. "Not as sorry as I am right now...." And she yanked the arrow out of his chest. He groaned at the action and closed his eyes, scrunching his nose at the pain. Ella put both hands on his chest and applied pressure to the wound, beginning the healing spells she could remember from the Circle. 

"Boss, the rift. Close the rift." He pushed her blood soaked hands away from him.

"Bull, no let me heal you first!" Ella tried to put her hands back to his chest and he pushed her away again.

"You know I'm right. Seal it or we all won't make it. Go on."

Ella nearly flinched at his order. She knew he was right, of course, but she felt so responsible. A misplaced blame but guilt felt nonetheless. Blackwall hadn't listened to her, he was more focused on her than anyone else. She hadn't solicited such attention but maybe if she had had that conversation this wouldn't have happened.

She reluctantly stood and turned towards the rift. She felt the barrier still upon her and Bull and she felt the anchor pulsing beneath her fingertips.  She reached out to the rift, as if searching for a latch.. Trying to find a doorknob; once feeling the familiar snag, she pulled back with force, slamming the door shut, effectively sealing the rift. The seal shook the remaining demons and she turned her attention back to Bull. She helped pull him up, throwing the giant's left arm over her shoulder, helping him walk toward the Fort's gates. Ella knew Bull was hardly resting any of his weight on her but she felt she was helping. With her left hand on his chest she recited the words of an old healing spell. It would numb some of the pain and help reduce the bleeding. Dorian ran to Bull's side demanding to know of his state, quickly throwing Bull's right arm over his shoulder.

"Bull, you're hurt.. I.. I saw. Where did it? Oh, left side.. Well, that's... Ella, have you healed it? Why is it still bleeding? Ella!?!?!"

Ella was so angry, and Bull's silence frightened her more than anything. If Bull were fine he would have been making jokes, he certainly wouldn't have allowed Dorian let alone Ella to assist in his walking.

"Dorian run ahead and find a healer, quickly."

Dorian looked up at Bull, fear coating his eyes, furrowing his brow. "Go, Kadan." On Bull's words, Dorian nodded and ran for the gates. 

Dorian worked quickly and men met Ella and Bull outside the gates and helped lead them to their infirmary. They ushered Bull onto a tiny (nearly too small for a dwarf) bed and he laughed before hissing in pain.

The healers went to work and Ella was forced out of the tent to allow the proper healing casts to work. Dorian remained by his side and Ella hoped for the best. She knew nothing of these healer's abilities and she prayed they knew more than her and Dorian combined. 

She could do nothing but pace.


	24. Breaking Blackwall

Dorian emerged from the tent with a long sigh.

"The arrow nearly pierced his heart. Hit the tissue surrounding it. Healers are almost finished, our champion will be okay." 

Ella wrapped her arms around the Mage, pulling him into an embrace. Dorian - usually one to playfully dismiss the sweetness of their friendship, allowed himself to relax in Ella's arms. They experienced a scare together and were left with an all too familiar realization, that not a one of them were invincible. Dorian pulled himself away from her embrace but held her hands in his.

"I haven't been that scared since Haven, Ella.. I'm going to kill Blackwall! That man could have cost me... - the Inquisition, one of their best warriors! Where is he?!?"

Ella wondered herself where Blackwall had gone to. In the heat of the battle her focus was entirely on Bull, she had assumed Blackwall had dealt with any remaining demons that lingered after closing the rift. She surveyed the area, nothing but soldiers sparring and others deep in conversation. 

"Darling will you check on Bull and ask the healers how long he needs to rest before travelling? I'll find Blackwall."

Dorian made to speak, but caught a glimpse of the anger in her eyes, the stiffness of her stature. He trusted Ella to say and do what was needed. With a nod and squeeze of her hand, Dorian headed into the tent.

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Ella wondered where to begin. She imagined Blackwall wouldn't be anywhere in the open. He'd be hidden away, brooding, self loathing and guilt-ridden. Despite her anger she reminded herself to award him some kindness. 

She found him by the water. He was sitting with his legs bent, hands on his knees, body curled in guilt. Ella took in the sight and a deep breath before stepping down the hill to him. The crunch of a twig gave her away and Blackwall didn't turn, only stiffened his back.

Ella felt nervous; she hated awkward moments like this but she steeled her focus again remembering his actions in battle and Bull's current state.

"Is he alright?"

Ella cleared her throat and sat beside the man. "He should be. Arrow nearly pierced the heart. Blackwall.. I.."

"My lady, I am so sorry. I let my feelings blind me. I've great admiration for you and I've never been more certain in my decision to join you. I never wanted to let you down"

Blackwall's deep gaze bore into Ella and she knew he felt terrible for his actions. She saw such a sadness behind his eyes it almost shook her resolve. 

"Blackwall, that's what I need to speak to you about.. You.. Admire me.."

"- Of course I do. You have the world at your feet. Myself included."

Blackwall was going to make this difficult. He seemed to return to a vulnerable state and began skipping rocks into the river. It was such a boyish action, it reminded her of her brother, Erik as a child. She bit her upper lip until she tasted blood.

"Blackwall, I need to tell you as my friend, that those feelings are.. one sided... I am hardly in a position to have any semblance of a relationship for one, and for two, if I'm being honest.. I have feelings for another. It will never be, I am the Inquisitor, likely to die in a wager for the world. Listen to me when I say this, I respect you, I know you to be invaluable to our gains, and I care for you as a good friend. I'm sorry for this reality however your actions within the inquisition need to reflect nothing but progression for our cause. I need you to be a part of this, as a member of this team. What happened today... cannot happen again. Do you understand?"

He took a deep breath and sighed. Ella was holding her breath waiting for his reaction. Her heart beat thrummed in her ears as every second went by.

"If only you knew how confounding you are, how infuriating. I understand, Inquisitor. Besides, I could never be what you deserve. I'm sorry about today and I'm glad to hear Bull is alright. Adieu my Lady, mayhaps one day, you'll forgive me for this."

Blackwall stood and walked away from Ella. She remained sitting by the river, throwing handfuls of rocks to their sinking. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath in, calming her mind. She had done it. She didn't feel good about it, but the necessary task was complete. She stayed there for some time, allowing herself to watch the sun begin to set. Soon after she heard quick footsteps towards her, and turned to address any potential threat. Dorian came scurrying towards her. "He's fine for travel, we can head home, Darling!"

Ellanora smiled at the sky and stood promptly. "First, base camp, then Skyhold!"


	25. Exhausted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A return to Skyhold,  
> A discovery and a deal made.

Ellanora and her party returned to Skyhold. Tired, and full of tension. Ella watched Blackwall speaking to Bull before departing to the solitude of the barn. Apologizing once more, she presumed. Dorian stared at the exchange with dismay, evidently Bull was more forgiving than his partner. Dorian turned to Ella, "Off to fetch a bottle then retire to the library. Join me later?" Ella promised to catch up with him there, once she took a long bath. Dorian took off ahead and the chargers crowded around Bull, welcoming him home. A few poked him in his chest, asking questions about his state. Ellanora smiled at the endearing sentiment, they obviously had been concerned for him from the missive she sent her advisors. Krem approached her amongst the crowd, and shook her hand. "Herald, thanks for taking care of the boss. Come have a drink with us tonight. We'll be celebrating in true Chargers form!"

As tempting as a night off would be, she knew she would have little time to relax before a council meeting would bring her back to reality. She thanked Krem, telling him she may make an appearance but no promises. Krem seemed to understand and offered her a nod. Ellanora had been dreaming about her bathtub, her soap and taking off her blighted armor the entire three day treck back to Skyhold. The trip had been awkward and tense and she was happy to be home. She looked forward to a quiet night in the library with Dorian and a bottle of Tevinter's finest.

Ellanora walked towards the stairs to the great hall. She felt so grateful to be back in the familiar comforts of home, she turned at the stairs to take in the entire scene. She saw Blackwall pacing in the barn, Cole perched on the brick wall in the courtyard, the Chargers and Bull making their way to the Tavern, and Cassandra .. reading a book?

Ella was all too curious about what on earth the Seeker could be reading so intensely. Cassandra often mocked how much time Dorian and Ella would spend reading in the library. She wasn't just reading, she held the book inches from her face, concealing the front cover. Curiousity won Ella's attention.

Ella learned Cassandra's dirty little secret. Cassandra nearly begged Ella to ask Varric to finish what he started.

Ella promised she would. She didn't, however, promise to keep it a secret.

Ellanora found Varric in his usual spot. She approached, smirking. Varric threw his head back and smiled, "I'm trying to figure out what caused that smirk.. Do I want to know?"

Ella sat down across from him and smiled. "Varric, I thought I'd inform you that Seeker Cassandra is waiting for the latest chapter of Swords and Shields."

Varric was frozen, including his smile. "I must have heard that wrong. It sounded like you just said that Cassandra read my books."

Ella relaxed in her seat, leaning back in the chair. "Shes a pretty big fan, in fact. I'd hoped to give it to her as a gift."

Once Varric finished whole heartedly laughing he agreed to complete it, conditionally. Varric insisted he be there when Ella gave her the latest installment. Ellanora shook the dwarf's hand, "You've got a deal." 

"I'll need a day or two to put it together. Cassandra has surprised me once again. Oh fuck, this will be funny."

Ellanora laughed and carried on to her chambers. Her bath was calling her name. Before heading up the stairs she requested that her helper bring her some tea and any missives for her from the war room. She figured if she got some work done beforehand, she wouldn't feel guilty about a quiet night of drinks with Dorian in the library. Ella drew herself a bath and stripped off her armour and cloak. She sunk into the tub with ease, letting the water envelope her in warmth, and release some tension in her muscles. She remained in the bath until the water grew cold. 

She reluctantly stood from the bath and wrapped a robe around herself. It was soft and cozy, she had no immediate interest in dressing. It was still early, and she settled into her couch and poured a cup of tea. She stretched out, testing the comfort of it as she pawned through missives written in her absence. Her eyes grew heavy and her focus waned. She only closed her eyes for a moment. That was all it took and in an instant, the Herald of Andraste was sound asleep. 


	26. Impatience

Dorian had been waiting in the library. An empty bottle of Tevinter wine on the table beside him. He waited a whole 15 minutes for Ella before opening the bottle. He reread the missive Ella had given him last time they were in Skyhold. He recounted their conversation about his family, his father. Ellanora shared with Dorian how strained her relationship with her father was and they grew closer because of their shared resentment. Dorian had said he wanted nothing to do with the situation and Ella had told him if he changed his mind she would support his every whim. After his wine in the darkness of the library he decided he was starved for confrontation. He was annoyed Ella hadn't shown, and intended to coax her to come with him to Redcliffe in return. He knew she would if he asked, but why bother with all that fuzzy stuff when you can guilt? He stood up far too quickly, shook off the dizziness and strode to the stairway to find Ella. 

Passing Varric the two nodded and addressed eachother as 'Sparkler' and 'Dwarf.' Dorian took the stairs to the Inquisitors quarters two by two. Upon reaching the landing he found a sleeping Ella cuddled into her couch, her face ontop of missives galore. He smiled at the sight, no longer annoyed at her absence, although the snoring took away from his admiration. He was about to turn and leave when he heard a knock on the door. He instead found himself curious.. Who would be knocking this late? Before he could truly ponder the possibilities he heard the door open and footsteps on the stairs.

\---------------------------------------

Cullen emerged from the stairway and he was taken aback at the sight of Dorian. What was he doing there?

"Ah, Commander, come to kiss the princess awake again, I see."

Cullen approached Dorian, "I'm not sure what you - oh. I.. Didn't realize she was resting... ..was she.."

"Trying to read several missives at once? I imagine so."

Cullen looked over at Ella. Maker, even in her sleep she was beautiful. Her long braided hair falling off the couch, her light snoring was adorable. Cullen felt a blush rise to his cheeks when he realized she was sleeping in a loose robe, one of her long legs jutting out of the fabric. Dorian chuckled, obviously noticing Cullen's affliction. "So what are you doing here chantry boy? Come to finally confess your love to our magelet?" 

Cullen furrowed his brow and glared at Dorian, "I don't know to what you're referring Dorian, I came here to speak with the Inquisitor." 

Dorian puffed out his chest and smiled deviously, "Well.. then you should wake her." Dorian headed for the stairs as Cullen shook his head, "Most certainly not. She must need her rest.." Dorian laughed and leaned over the stairs, eyeing Ella on the couch. "I assure you Commander, she needs _you_ more.." He winked at Cullen before jumping on the next stair with all of his body weight forcing a loud 'boom' to emanate throughout the room. 

Ellanora jolted from her slumber, alert but foggy. She opened her eyes to find Cullen standing in front of her, him frozen to the spot with an odd expression on his face. "Cullen... What are you..?" He seemed frazzled all of a sudden and began to stutter and stammer "..forgive me, I came to talk to you regarding.. Uh.. I didn't mean to wake you.." Ella sat up, readjusting her robe with one hand and rubbing her eye awake with the other. A missive was stuck to her cheek and she found Cullen with a grin on his face. Ella instinctively looked down, making sure she wasn't exposed. "Maker.. What? Why do you have that grin on your face??" Cullen took a long stride toward Ella and lightly tugged at the missive adorning her cheek. "Oh.." Ella blushed and shrunk into her seat. Cullen put the missive on the table and headed towards the stairs. "Apologies, Inquisitor. Please do come see me tomorrow before the war meeting, I'll leave you now to your rest.. Goodnight." He scurried down the stairs and Ella heard the door close behind him. She wondered why he would wake her only to leave suddenly. She found herself too exhausted to answer and threw herself into her bed. Exhaustion and sore muscles pawing at her, her comfortable bed took over. She was, once again, asleep in seconds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been working like a maniac lately, but I decided to post two chapters today to get my mind off work.  
> Comments are greatly appreciated.


	27. A Confession

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick one. my posts are slowly creeping up to my reserve of chapters so I'm trying to bang out as much as possible to not keep anyone waiting. Here's a little guy to *hopefully* tide you over until Friday. Thanks, guys!

Ellanora headed to Cullen's office the next morning. She found herself slightly nervous he asked her to meet him before the war meeting. She entered his office to find him perched above his desk, obviously in deep thought. She approached his desk warily, worried of what he had to say.

"As leader of the Inquisition.. there's something I must tell you."

Her stomach filled with butterflies as Ella looked into his eyes. "Cul... Whatever it is, I'm willing to listen."

And listen she did as Cullen went on to tell her his secret. His respectful choice of cutting ties to his lyrium addiction, to the Chantry, to his past. She found a lump in her throat at his confession. She knew he was of course courageous and determined, yet also putting himself at such a high risk. It made her sick to think of the possibilities. Ella thought of his situation, of the pain he must be in. She made a mental note to read anything and everything she could on lyrium to help him. Maker, she had to help him. She found herself wanting to close the distance between them, to hold him, comfort him. She thought about sitting up on the desk, where he could rest his head in her lap and she could stroke his hair back. She would give anything to make him feel at ease.

She released her breath she hadn't realized she was holding in as Cullen appeared to be expecting a response from her. "Are you in pain?"

"I can endure it." His expression so stoic, she almost believed him.

She stood before him, twisting at her fingertips, clearly a nervous habit. She took a deep breath and improved her posture before declaring her assent. "Thank you for telling me. I respect what you're doing, Cullen."

Cullen's demeanor appeared as if his confession offered no him relief. He pressed his palms into the desk again, breathing a deep sigh. Ellanora assumed he wanted to be alone and she made for the door. She stopped a moment before leaving, the words coming to her mind clear as day. She remembered it from the Circle. She kept her body turned towards the door and said the words softly and slowly.

_"Maker, though the darkness comes upon me,_  


_I shall embrace the light._

_I shall weather the storm._

_I shall endure._

_What you have created, no one can tear asunder."_

She turned and offered him a sweet smile, and slipped out the door.


	28. Acceptance

Dorian intercepted her on her way back to her chambers. She had hardly gathered her thoughts on Cullen's... situation, before Dorian expressed his disappointment and hurt by her lack of showing up at the library the night before. He told her they would leave for Redcliffe that afternoon, just the two of them. "You ought to tell your advisors you're playing hookey for the day and helping me. Actually, leave out the helping me part. Cullen is irresistible when he's angry." Ella rolled her eyes but agreed. She had told Dorian at any point if he wanted to confront his father's messenger she would be there for him. She understood this was something Dorian wanted, no, needed, and was willing to help him through it. She tried to calm her mind on thoughts of Cullen before heading to the war room.

She opened the door to find Cullen, alone. _So much for calming my mind_ Leliana and Josephine were evidently running behind. He raised his head at her entry and offered a soft smile. She approached the war table, tracing her fingers on the map. She sighed.

"Cullen, I hope you'll be okay.. I can't.. I ... you're very brave." She exhaled as if her words defeated her. She knew what she wanted to say but couldn't seem to form the words. _I'm worried for you, this is scary, the idea of you not making it, I couldn't bear it.. What can I do to help you?_  


He stood straight, strong. "Ah.. Thank you, Inquisitor.. I appreciate--"

Leliana and Josephine strode into the room laughing to eachother at whatever they were discussing. They turned and saw Cullen and Ella, the tension palpable. Before anything could be brought up Ella took the floor, "I understand we are eager to move forward but I promised a friend I would assist them in Redcliffe. Dorian and I will be heading out later this afternoon and I've decided I will also stop at the Ghislain Estate to meet Madame Der Fer. She has reached out, eager to meet with me." The group exchanged looks and appeared about to protest. Ella held her ground and looked at Josephine, offering a bait, "I understand she can help us as far as 'the game' goes, her political pull as First Enchanter and respected in certain circles can only help us as we look to gain influence at the Winter Palace. Tell me I'm wrong, Josie..."

Josie seemed to blush as all eyes were on her suddenly. "Inquisitor, you are not wrong. I would.. recommend such a visit. Madame De Fer would assist the Inquisition immeasurably."

"Excellent. We shall depart later today. If there is any other business to go through I'd like to do so now before preparing to depart." Leliana and Cullen seemed to share a sigh before launching into Inquisition matters. Cullen disagreed with Ella heading to Redcliffe with only Dorian. He insisted that she take other members of her inner circle. Cassandra, for example. Dorian had been adamant about maintaining privacy in this matter and Ella kindly countervailed his insistence and moved on. Once that issue was successfully nullified, Josephine took to her role as Ambassador again. "Inquisitor, I must insist you take no more than 3 days time from now to return, I have many nobles coming to Skyhold and your presence is absolutely necessary. No way around this, I'm afraid Ella. You _must_ be present."

Ellanora agreed, promising to return in three days to Skyhold. She sighed at the idea of pesky Orlesian nobles being in her home, but accepted the allocation she was given to support her friend. Leliana had reminded Ella that whether she liked it or not her travels would be documented by her scouts across the Hinterlands. Ella knew there was nothing to be held from the Inquisition's Spymaster and nearly rolled her eyes. Each advisor wished her a safe journey and Ella headed to her quarters to pack clothing and change into her armour. As Dorian declared himself 'ready to go already' she ran ahead to the library, she searched the shelves quickly, determined. She discovered what she was looking for. _On Lyrium : A Templar's Memoir by Ser Treus._ She'd take this along for the journey, read as much as she could and be able to return and hopefully help her Commander, whatever it took.

Ellanora was still uneasy on a horse and insisted her and Dorian double ride or walk. Dorian boosted Ella onto the mount with distain and mirth. He accepted her willingness to take this trip with him.. for him. Although he wasn't one for affection he looked forward to some time alone with his dear friend. Especially knowing this journey wouldn't be easy. They left Skyhold that afternoon, Ella turned to wave at her advisors, hoping to channel all of her energy towards Cullen. Wishing he would notice her soft smile and desperate prayers for his health and perseverance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things will be from Ella's POV for a while, but Cullen will have his side told in due time.. plus another dream sequence ;)  
> Comments and kudos are really keeping me going :)


	29. Redcliffe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dorian and Ella are bff

Ella and Dorian arrived in Redcliffe at nightfall. The town was quiet. They entered the tavern, gripping their staffs ready for any senario. Dorian took a deep breath and approached a man near the stairwell. Evidently this was Dorian's father, in the flesh, having arrived for a personal conversation with his son.  
Ella kept herself near the door. She knew Dorian asked her to come for a reason but also wanted to respect his privacy. After a few minutes of formalities and apologies, she pressed Dorian's father to speak.

The conversation was more of a lion vrs lamb approach. Confrontation and the other, retreating. Ellanora was proud of her friend for his backbone, unfaltering. Soon she learned the root of the problem.

"I prefer the company of men, my father disapproves."

Ella wanted to remain candid, neutral. She respected Dorian and his choices - it was his business, who cares? He was her friend and that was all that mattered to her. His character was not questionable to her. She decided to maintain a non biased approach, only to encourage their conversation, whether she agreed or not, she knew it was necessary. "That's a big concern in Tevinter then?"

Dorian squared his shouldered and huffed, "Only if you're trying to live up to an impossible standard. Trying to find the perfect leader. In my father's world, every flaw is deviant and shameful, it must be hidden."

Ellanora couldn't suppress her eyes rolling, "So that's what all this is about? Who you sleep with?"

His father interjected. He appeared uncomfortable with the Inquisitor's remaining presence. "Dorian please if you'll only listen to me..."

"You taught me to hate blood magic, but what was the first thing you did, when your precious heir refused to play pretend for the rest of his life? You tried to change me. For your fucking legacy - anything for that."

Ellanora bit her lip, and found herself clenching her fists. She wanted to kick his teeth in. How could he want to change his own son? For nothing but politics. She supposed, as she released her fist, that she had her own resentments with that matter. Through clenched teeth she said what she thought would be right, would help her friend, although she knew if roles reversed, she wouldn't even consider it. "Don't leave it like this Dorian, you'll never forgive yourself."

Dorian turned to her, his eyes pleading. Knowing she was right but also knowing she wouldn't give a damn if it were her. He knew she must have struggled to say those words. He sighed. "I joined the Inquisition because its the right thing to do, once I had a father who would have known that."

Dorian was beginning to walk away. Ella headed to open the door for him.

Dorian's father's voice was soft, apologetic. "Once I had a son who trusted me, a trust I betrayed.  
I only wanted to talk to him to hear his voice again, to ask him to forgive me."

Ella felt her eyes begin to water and turned to Dorian. He nodded to her, and she left the Tavern. She sat outfront, taking in the cold air. Before she could even begin her thoughts on her own family, Dorian emerged and drew her to his chest. He embraced her for a few long moments. They were both aware of their resentments and disappointments in their own families. "Alright then!" Dorian declared. The two walked hand in hand to the docks. They sat there for maybe an hour. Staring at the ships, the horizon... the possibilities in their minds. They sat in silence, holding hands the entire time before eventually heading to the Inn to sleep.


	30. Ghislain Estate

As much as Ella knew Madame De Fer could help the Inquisition, she also found herself frustrated that she was in Val Royeaux and didn't have time to stop at the University or the Chantry to visit her siblings. She hadn't seen Erik in years, since her harrowing. They wrote eachother constantly throughout the years. Although she wrote letters to each of her siblings after the Conclave, Erik was the only one she truly explained everything to. Ruth on the other hand, she hadn't seen since she left for the Circle. Ella sighed. She supposed it had been too long to just show up. She promised herself  when she arrived back in Skyhold to write to her sister and try to connect the next time she found herself in Val Royeaux. In the meantime, she had a party to attend.

Ella insisted they arrive in their armour regardless of the formality of the party. "Oh sweetling, you've got to be kidding me. Let this be your first lesson in the game - it doesn't matter what's on the inside, it's the outside that counts. Come, there's a tailor Josephine already made arrangements with for us."

The morning was spent trying on seemingly endless dress possibilities. Dorian appeared to love the show. Ellanora couldn't wait to be done with it. She wanted to return to Skyhold where she could maybe keep an eye on Cullen, be around if he needed her help. Her mind raced with herbal salves or tea she could make for him, reading about Lyrium had only pushed her curiosity further. Just as she recited in her mind the different properties of oils extracted from plants and herbs known to heal, Dorian grabbed her hand and spun her in a circle. She noted as she moved, purple fabric peeked out between the pleats of her long grey skirt. Catching her reflection in the mirror she found herself surprised. She was wearing a beautiful grey dress, fitted to her lean body, with a purple lace covering her chest, working its way around her neck, ruffling slightly at the top. It cut off at the shoulders and she had elbow length matching grey gloves to cover the mark. She felt taller. She smiled at her reflection and at Dorian standing behind her. He was decked out in a dark purple jacket with dark breeches, that looked just the right amount of tight. "Well don't we look dashing. Perhaps you should stop daydreaming about your beloved Commander and just marry me. I may not be able to offer certain .. comforts, but Ella - just think of all the outfits!"

Ella and Dorian giggled together before declared themselves ready to head to the Ghislain Estate.

Dorian and Ella entered the salon and Dorian immediately sought out wine for the two. In a matter of moments after being announced, she had learned that Madame De Fer was a cute nickname for Grand Enchanter Vivienne. She also learned that Duke Bastien hadn't been seen in court lately and that Ella's reputation did in fact proceed her.

It only took another few moments before her and her cause were being insulted by some petty man, clearly overcompensating for his own lack luster life. She refused to have everything they had fought for be summed up to political outcasts fighting for power. She could give a damn for politics and she assured the crowd they were only trying to restore peace. She had had just about enough of this annoying man, she began to speak and he froze before Ella, whimpering at Vivienne's assault.

When Madame De Fer asked Ella what to do with the man, Ella nearly bludgeoned him herself with her staff, but decided Josephine probably wouldn't have recommended that. She thought rather to act indignant, she told Vivienne to do whatever she'd like with him. She berated the man, and Ella couldn't help but smirk. As Vivienne went on Ella watched the crowd and took into consideration how lethal Vivienne's words were. She was impacting the marquee's influence and status with just a few carefully chosen quips. It was impressive and incredibly intimidating. Ella wondered what it would be like to see Vivienne square off against Alessia.

Dorian was in the backround, giggling to himself, holding two glasses of wine. Vivienne and Ella went upstairs to discuss business. After introductions and status declarations were made, Vivienne asserted herself as invaluable to the Inquisition. Ella could hear Josephine repeating those words in her head. Madame De Fer was no doubt, someone with a lot of power. She was definitely someone to help them with the Winter Palace.

"Great things are beginning, my dear. I can promise you that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, I'm going on holidays for a week so I'm posting today to keep you guys satisfied (hopefully) until I return, so no post this Friday but I'm back from Vancouver on the 9th (my birthday yay) so I'll post then. My boyfriend is going to kill me I'm supposed to be running out the door to go to the airport but I just had to post. Send me comments guys, I'd love to read them on my trip!


	31. Skyhold and Tea Parties

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the delay, it's been an interesting week heading back to work from vacation and I've been super sick. Here's to you, readers! Also, anyone have a better suggestion for title of this chapter? I was eager to post and didn't think much of it.

Ellanora was frustrated upon her return to Skyhold. As much as she had been impressed by Lady Vivienne, she regretted travelling with her back home. The entire trip Vivienne complained. She commented on Ella's distasteful armour and how she 'just _must_ fetch an Orlesian tailor' if she wanted to "look the part" of Inquisitor. Vivienne corrected nearly everything Ellanora said and then, throwing salt in the wound, insisted she partake in etiquette classes. Vivienne reminded Ella of Alessia in a lot of ways and the resemblance annoyed her. Ellanora found herself purposely trying to find positive differences between the two.

Even Dorian found Vivienne to be 'too much' - and, Maker, that was coming from Dorian. Getting to the gates of Skyhold Ella let out an audible sigh, and Dorian, seated behind her on their Ferelden Mare, chuckled under his breath. Vivienne had stopped ahead, and demanded soldiers at the gate to take care of the horses. Dorian dismounted and turned to Ella. "Do you think we could just send her and her horse back to Val Royeaux?" He asked as he helped Ella down from the horse.

Ella's feet hit the ground with a loud thump. Her eyes found Skyhold, she scanned the battlements. "Uh, what? Oh, yeah.. that would be...good?"

Dorian laughed. "Too excited to see your Commander you can't even respond to a simple question, I see!"

Ella's cheeks burnt crimson and she kept her expression stoic. They passed the gates and she hoped the soldiers hadn't heard him.

"No, no, no, my dear." Evidently Vivienne had. "You have got to be kidding me. Someone of your status cannot be even entertaining that notion. Really, dear, come on."

Ella glared into Dorian and he retreated, quickly, helping the soldiers lead the horses to the barn. Ella tried to make herself sound uninterested, unaffected. "I have a meeting. If you'll excuse me." She headed to the war room, hearing the horn announce her return to Skyhold. Two days of discussing dresses and etiquette and the game... she had enough.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cullen was pacing the war room. He rested his shakey hands on the pommel of his sword, steadying them, as he felt his irritation bubble.

"We should be looking into Corepheyus.. into this red lyrium, not throwing tea parties and pointless dinners!"

Josephine looked at Leliana and took a deep breath. "Commander, the game is important. We need to get these nobles to openly support our cause or we won't have any influence to be included at the Winter Palace - "

"Which leads to the fall of the empress.. demon army... ringing any bells?" Leliana interjected.

Cullen looked defeated. He huffed before declaring, "I don't want this to take up too much time or Skyhold's resources for that matter. There is so much we must do, and this is all so... petty. The Inquisitor is not going to like this."

Leliana and Josie giggled and spoke low to one another and Cullen was already rolling his eyes when the door opened and an irritated Ellanora strode in.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

She found her advisors in the war room already. Her eyes locked on Cullen and she took note of the dark circles under his eyes, and his hair not as perfectly slicked back as usual. He didn't look so good. Well, he always looked good, but she was worried. She decided to speak with him afterward. For now, it was down to business.

"Josephine, I think you may love me for bringing Vivienne here, or hate me. As for everyone else, I apologize in advance."

Cullen cleared his throat, "She can't be all that bad, can she?"

Leliana chimed in, "Vivienne is heavily invested in the game. She plays to win and she has contacts in the Imperial Court and is all about etiquette, manipulation of appearances and politics. I have a feeling the two of you may not have much in common."

Cullen rolled his eyes and sighed. "No, I suppose not. I accept your apology, Inquisitor. We will endure."

Ellanora smiled at Cullen and found herself staring in his direction a little longer than she should. Josephine politely coughed and she drew her attention back to the meeting. "I am sure Lady Vivienne will bring more to the Inquisition than you can imagine right now. I can assure you her help will be welcome. Did everything go well in Redcliffe?"

Ella found herself bashful, not wanting to disclose anything about her friend and what the visit to Redcliff village entailed. "Yes.. it was fine. Everything is well, thank you. So where does our next order of business take me?"

Josie took a step towards Ellanora. "Well, Inquisitor, you'll actually be here in Skyhold for the time being. I have arranged several meetings and dinner with various nobles from Orlais who are eager to meet with you. I will debrief you on each person prior to your meeting them, and there will be a fitting..."

Ellanora had been pacing the war room, unintentionally mimicking Cullen's earlier behavior. She stopped short suddenly. "..a fitting???"

Josie glanced down at her clipboard and nodded, "Yes, Ella, a fitting. You are expected to wear the finest fabrics and latest fashions here at Skyhold during the noble's visit. We must show we are a strong, financially sound organization and you, as our leader, must..."

"---Let me guess.. 'look the part'?" Ellanora leaned over the war table, her eyes darting across the map. She sighed and turned on her heel to face Josie. "I suppose there's no point in arguing with you since it's just going to happen anyway. However - if any noble proves to be... let's say, less than polite, I reserve the right to kick them out of Skyhold."

Cullen laughed and declared, "Seconded!"

He looked like the life returned to his face in that moment. His smile speading like sunshine trying to break through. His smile literally took her breath away and she gushed at him for a moment before collecting herself again. Josie and Leliana both smirked and agreed to their terms.

"They will arrive tomorrow morning. You have today to rest. I will meet you in my office at the third bell. Enjoy your day, Inquisitor." Josie and Leliana linked arms and left the war room in whispers.

Ellanora returned her attention to Cullen.

"So...how are you?"

Cullen nearly grimaced at the worry thick in Ella's question. "I have good days and bad days, I suppose. Today I was irritated a little faster than usual."

He smiled at that. Cullen knew he could have a quick temper. Ella smiled too, glad he was able to joke lightly about his situation.

"I noticed it was a little.. Tense when I came in." Ella strode to the war table and sat on the edge, perched towards Cullen. 

"Yes, well, I.. My argument of finding more information on Corepheyus or red lyrium fell on deaf ears in favour of tea parties." Cullen rose his hand to the back of his neck " ..I disagree with all this noble nonsense and find it highly unnecessary. Especially here, I'd hoped..."

Cullen had taken to twisting the fingertips of his gloves as he spoke. Ellanora found it delightfully immature and she leaned forward slightly, curious to hear his thoughts. "Oh? You hoped...?"

He caught her eyes staring at his fumbling hands and threw them to his sides. "I had hoped that Skyhold would be free of all that. ..for you. I've noticed the disinterest you have for the game, you and I share that undoubtedly. I just thought of Skyhold as a place you could just ..be. I.. Makers breath - I am rambling as bad as Sera."

Ellanora stood from the table and stepped closer to Cullen. "No, I.. Get it. And I do wish that to be the case but .. Well, it isn't. I suppose I should become accustomed to having to do things I don't necessarily want to do. But I can do something now to put your mind at ease."

She was standing so close to him. The hair on the back of his neck stood on end and he wanted so badly to sweep the hair out of her face, pull her chin up and kiss her deeply. Now _that_ would put his mind at ease. He lost himself in her blue eyes and nearly fell into her in one fell swoop.

"A-and what would that be?" He nearly whispered.

Ellanora was looking up at Cullen, into his amber eyes, melting into her. She didn't trust herself at all in that moment and needed to focus on her retreat. She stepped away from him slowly, letting whatever was building between them linger.

"I'm off to find Varric!" She declared over her shoulder with a wink as she left the war room. As the door closed behind her Cullen wondered what on earth that was supposed to mean, and how on earth that was supposed to put his mind at ease.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment, let me know what you think!!!


	32. Meeting Hawke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ella meets a foxy looking Hawke.

Ellanora steadied her breath as she walked up the steps to the battlements. Maker, she had been so close to Cullen. She could feel heat radiating off his body, meeting her own. He smelt like leather and metal, and something curiously sweet. She knew she needed to shake the memory from her mind as she was probably wearing the want on her face. 

She could see Varric up ahead and she waved to him as she headed over. 

"Glad you could make it. Inquisitor, meet Hawke, the champion of Kirkwall." 

Ellanora was surprised. She was thrilled to meet him and also curious what brought him to Skyhold. She shook his hand as he declared in a low tone, "though I don't use that title much anymore, it is a pleasure to meet you, Inquisitor. Varric speaks highly of the Inquisition, and its leader."

Ellanora blushed. She found herself studying Hawke's face and stature. From everything she had read about the champion of Kirkwall, she was bridging the image of him she had in her mind with the man standing before her. Dark hair, full beard, he still had a boyish charm to his otherwise commanding stature. "Call me Ella, please. It's nice to meet you. Now, Varric tells me you have some information on Corepheyus."

Varric stepped away to pour drinks and Hawke and Ella turned to the brick wall. "You've already dropped half a mountain on the bastard. I'm sure anything I tell you pales in comparison." He chuckled under his breath and smiled at her.

Ella was flustered momentarily. Was Hawke.. Flirting with her? No, that would be absurd. Ella hardened her expression and squared her shoulders. "Oh I don't know, you did save a city from a horde of raging Qunari."

Hawke laughed earnestly. "So you've read the stories, I see. Well, you've already sealed the breach - now _that's_ damn impressive."

Yep, definitly flirting, Ella thought. "Um, thanks. So.. Varric said that you fought Corepheyus before?"

Hawke stood up tall before her. "Fought and killed. The grey wardens were holding him. He used his connection to darkspawn to influence them."

Varric approached the pair with glasses of wine for the two of them, "Corepheyus got into their heads, messed with their minds, turned them against eachother." Varric said before taking a generous swig from the remaining bottle.

Ella didn't like this, didn't like this at all. "So Corepheyus has the Venatori, the rebel mages and possibly the Wardens as well?"

Hawke appeared to be angered by the idea and remarked, "I didn't come this far just to meet the Inquisition's _exquisite_ leader with bad news. I've got a friend in the wardens, he was investigating something unrelated for me. His name is Stroud. He's been worried about corruption in the warden ranks. He told me he would be hiding in an old smugglers cave near Crestwood." 

Ella brightened up at the good news. "Well, that's where we will head to next, then."

Hawke stepped slightly closer to her and she caught Varric's seemingly unapproving eye in her peripheral vision. "I'll do whatever necessary to stop him, my lady. Corepheyus is my responsibility. I thought I killed him before, this time, I'll be sure of it."

Ella stuck around to both politely finish her wine and discuss Red lyrium with Hawke. He disclosed his discovery of it in Kirkwall. Ella felt her head spinning from the conversation and the worry regarding the Wardens. Before she knew it, she was excusing herself, setting her glass down. Hawke reached for her hand, politely kissed her knuckles and announced "I will meet you in Crestwood." Ella eyed an uncomfortable Varric and headed down to the gardens.

She walked to clear her head, to form a plan of attack if the Wardens really were corrupted. Ella walked aimlessly, seeing Mother Giselle conversing with Inquisition soldiers while others relaxed, enjoying the warmer weather.

She was nervously picking at her nails, staring at her feet as she took a step towards the gazebo she usually sat at. She nearly stumbled on the second step when she heard _"Inquisitor!"_ in a far too familiar voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are super appreciated guys.


	33. Chess

 “Inquisitor!”

Ella's eyes met Cullen's and he stood from his chair, nearly knocking the chess board over. Dorian leaned back in his chair with a smile on his face, his mustache twisting up at the ends. “Leaving, are you? Does this mean I win?”  Ella refused to let that smug smile remain on Dorian's face. “Please, don’t stop on my account.” Cullen seemed to recognize that in her as she leaned against a pillar of the gazebo.

“Alright, your move.” He declared as he sat back down.

“You need to come to terms with my inevitable victory. You’ll feel much better.” Ella saw Dorian's cocky behavior many times but this time she really hoped Cullen would win. Scanning the board she imagined Cullen would have him in two moves.  
Cullen reached for the board and placed his piece, before leaning back in his chair, as confidently as Dorian had moments before. “Really? Because I just won, and I feel fine.”

Dorian looked at the board with disdain. He had been had. “Don’t get smug. They’ll be no living with you.” Dorian rose to his feet and stalked off to the main tower.

Cullen smiled earnestly. Something inside Ella told her that she would give anything, do anything to see that smile again. “I should return to my duties. Well, unless you would care for a game.” He rose one eyebrow at her and offered a competitive glare.

Ellanora pushed off the pillar and strode towards the table. “Prepare the board, Commander.”

 Ella settled in her seat and Cullen settled into conversation. “As a child I played this with my sister. She would get this stuck up grin whenever she won - which was all the time. My brother and I practiced together for weeks. Ah, the look on her face the day I finally won. Between serving the Templars and the Inquisition, I haven’t seen them in years. I wonder if she still plays.”

Ella found herself surprised to hear Cullen speaking about having a brother and sister. “You have siblings?”

Cullen appeared equally surprised at his admission but continued, seeing the interest in Ella's eyes.  
“Two sisters, and a brother.”  
Ella placed another piece on the board before asking, “Where are they now?”  
“They moved to South Reach after the blight. I do not write to them as often as I should. Ah, It’s my turn.”  
“Alright, let’s see what you’ve got.”

Ella noticed Cullen's hand tremble slightly when he reached for his piece. She found herself staring at where his hand was, thoughts of his lyrium withdrawal filling her mind. She recalled a confession she read, written by a lyrium addicted Templar imprisoned. His rations had been cut in half, only for a short time, but he described the pain, the nightmares and the memory loss.

"Ella?" She looked up again to find honey amber eyes reaching hers. "..It's your turn." He said softly. She picked up a piece - any piece, and placed it. A stupid move, really. She played herself right into his trap.

“This may be the longest we’ve gone without discussing the Inquisition, or related matters. To be honest, I appreciate the distraction." She hoped to cling to his words desperately, to the low, sweet tone his voice took over.

"We should spend more time together." She nearly winced at her honesty, but her embarrassment was quickly calmed by his own admission, "I would like that."

She found herself staring at him, dumbfounded, taken aback by his meeting her honesty. She was expecting laughter, or rejection. She blushed and mustered "Me too."

Cullen leaned in closer to her, and mumbled in a low voice and paired with a chuckle, "You said that." Ella managed to turn nearly beet red at his remark. She really was incapable of thinking clearly around him.

"I certainly hope you play the Game better than you play chess. The Inquisition is counting on it."

Vivienne appeared as if out of nowhere. She always managed to maintain an effortless charisma about her. She didn't walk, she'd glide through the courtyard with the hem of her beautiful dresses behind her.

"Madame De Fer, hello. And I'm afraid she's correct, Inquisitor, I believe this game is mine." Cullen stood to greet Vivienne and after meeting her gaze, he moved his final piece on the board.

"Good afternoon Commander. Inquisitor, there are several tasks to prepare you for the nobles visiting tomorrow"

Ella felt frustrated, Josie told her she had today to relax. Ella opened her mouth as if to speak but Vivienne interjected, "Dear, you can rematch the Commander another time - but right now, we have some gowns for you to try." Ella rolled her eyes, suddenly feeling like she was back at the Trevalyan estate.

"We shall have to do this again sometime, Inquisitor." Cullen offered a small bow to both ladies before walking away. This time Vivienne rolled her eyes and linked her arm with Ella's. Ella let Vivienne lead her to the main tower as she thought about that teasing smile, lips pulling at his scar, desire pulling at her heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry guys, I've been sooo busy having recently moved and I have been playing some new video games that have taken some of my focus off of my love story. But I am here, and I am hoping to expand this storyline using the new Tresspass DLC story at the end too, although we are a long way off. Sorry again for being gone so long.


	34. A Fitting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I laughed my butt off writing this I hope you enjoy :)

After what seemed like hours, Ella was reaching her limit. Being squeezed into one dress or another, Ella was convinced all Orlesian fashion designers must hate women. The corsets would constrict her breathing and hurt to even move in, there was no practicality. Dorian and Cassandra argued over the necessity of the entire thing. Ella was happy to have at least one person in her corner, although she knew her shared opinion of it being ridiculous would fall on deaf ears. Whether she liked it or not, this was part of the job.

At Vivienne's fifth or sixth demand to "suck it in and stand up straight" Ella cast Dorian a look that could only mean one thing. Dorian left the room briefly and returned with two bottles of wine in hand from the cellar. He handed Ella a glass after Josephine successfully zipped and buttoned and clasped her into one of the three dresses they had narrowed the enormous selection down to. It had been decided early that purple was Ellanora's colour. Feminine, but still demanding of power and in deep contrast to her blonde hair and sunkissed complexion.

The dress itself was long, and fanned out at the bottom, yet fit her snug at the waist. It cut off at the shoulders revealing her toned upper arms from the past months in battle and training. The dress also had - against Ella's modesty, an open diamond in the chest that revealed ample cleavage the tight corset underneath helped create. Ella threw her glass back and Dorian returned to her side to refill. Josephine and Vivienne spoke in the background of the latest trends and fabrics while Ella realized the top of her dress was somewhat similar to what Vivienne wore around Skyhold. Perhaps it was a coincidence, or perhaps Vivienne was playing the game even here, in Josephine's office. Maybe Vivienne wanted Ella to appear as her apprentice to the noble vultures arriving in the morning. Before Ella could ponder those implications, Bull and Sera barged into the office.

"Daaaamn, Boss!" Bull declared at the sight of her. Dorian rolled his eyes and Sera grinned and mumbled in accord to Bull's statement.

"What are you two doing here?" Ella asked. Bull moved closer to the group and sat beside Dorian. "My 'Vint here said there was a show." Bull winked at Ella as Dorian stood from his seat. Vivienne and Josephine rolled their eyes nearly simultaneously. Dorian approached Ella, took her hand and spun her around, letting the dress pickup in the air and flow beautifully.

Ella smiled, feeling rather pretty in her dark purple dress. She hadn't revealed to Josie or Vivienne that purple was her favourite hue. She heard the door to Josie's office open and shut as Dorian spun her around.

"So what's the big emergency --- Maker's breath!"

When Ella completed her spin, she found Cullen standing just ahead of the door, staring at her. No, not staring at her, mystified by her. Her smile remained but a warm blush spread over her cheeks and chest. Ella heard Dorian mumble something under his breath that sounded like "impeccable timing, Dorian." Evidently congratulating himself for his sneaky work on his way to fetch wine.

She felt like it was just her and Cullen in the room as he took in the sight of her. He eyed her from head to toe with his eyes wide, taking her in like breath. It was - of course - a crude comment from Bull to pull them out of their daze. "Boss, that dress really works wonders for your chest, I mean.. I had no idea you were packing those! Makes you just wanna raspberry 'em." Ella snapped to attention and saw Dorian punch Bull in the arm. "What?" She asked. Bull chuckled while Sera stepped up with her hands in front of her, cupped, and said "You know..." before completing her demonstration with moving her head side to side while making a lip vibrating "BRRRRRRR" sound.

The entire room was silent and looking at Ellanora. She couldn't help it, she tried covering her mouth to stop it, but she was laughing hysterically in no time. Most of the group joined in, aside from Vivienne, Cassandra and Cullen. Even Josephine tried to suppress a giggle. Cassandra stood, outraged, "That's the Herald you're speaking of! Mind your tongue!" Sera stood again to speak and Cullen interjected, "Don't even, Sera. Now, if there's no emergency I'll be returning to my duties." He made to head for the door but stopped and turned his body half way toward Ella. "..And Inquisitor - you look.. umm, the dress.. it's ahh, quite fetching. Good day." At his leave Cassandra followed and Sera and Bull stalked off mumbling about the Tavern.

Ellanora looked at her reflection, blushing more from Cullen's comment than Bull's. She decided this was the dress she wanted. "No need to try anymore, this one will do." Ella caught knowing glimpses from Dorian and Josephine. His was the only approval she'd ever seek, and she would feel invincible around those vulture nobles knowing she could elicit such a reaction from her otherwise stoic commander.


	35. Nobility

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is for PrivateGal - your comments and love of this story really revived my own love for it and inspired me to keep writing. Here you go, girl. Sorry if I'm a little rusty, I wanted to put something out there to show you I'm still working on this story. My apologies to anyone I may have let down when I pressed pause on this fanfic, just had a lot of personal things come up in the last few months that kept this story at bay. I am committed to finishing this - these dorks (Cullen & Ella) deserve it! ;)

The nobles flocked to Skyhold like a moth to the flame. They filled the great hall and rotunda - much to Solas' distain.  
Skyhold was louder, the roar of gossip and criticism droned on and on. Josephine had prepped Ellanora on what to expect - on how to play the game. Ellanora had been doing well over the last few days - despite her hatred of the game and of all the nobles invading her sanctuary. She often found herself eyeing the stables, wondering how upset Josie would be if she took off. But her fear of riding horses kept her in her noble infested waters.

Today she found herself playing chess with Lady Drummond. Josie wasn't kidding - she was competitive and obsessed with winning. It was refreshing - a noble interested in a leisurely game, not a political one. The afternoon felt normal, aside from playing chess in an elaborate gown with other - mainly male, nobles watching. Ellanora did not even want to think about the marriage proposals she had received in the last few days. Josephine made a joke about not being able to see the surface of her desk with all the noble's written offers. This thought made Ella sick to her stomach.

Cullen had had enough. Skyhold was swarming with nobles and he despised every minute he had to leave his office. With the nobles around he hadn't had the chance to see Ella, let alone speak with her. Not as though he had anything in particular to discuss, but he wished he could ask her how she was handling it all. She appeared to be doing well, but he knew she hated nobility and the game just as much as he did, and he worried for her. One afternoon, he caught a glimpse of her near her dragon-bone throne on his way to the undercroft. She was wearing a navy blue form fitted gown. It was detailed with gold buttons up the chest and shoulders, and her hair was swept up, away from her face. He eyed her from across the room as he stepped between nobles and dignitaries in the great hall. He caught her eye and she smiled sweetly, albeit briefly at him before returning to her conversation. His heart nearly skipping a beat at the glimpse of her smile. His mind was consumed with thoughts of her, swimming around him and tugging at his focus. His thoughts were interrupted with the words of gossiping nobles all around him.

__

"I suppose she's pretty but have you seen those scars? Awful!"

"...and what of that horrible mark on her hand? I heard Ser Griffith saw her without gloves on, it was ghastly!"

"Well I heard Ser Griffith saw her with more than just her gloves off."

"Oh please, like someone of his stature would be with the likes of her."

Cullen was infuriated. How dare they say such blasphemous things and in Skyhold of all places. He knew Josephine would not recommend speaking to these nobles and calling them out for their lies and cruelty. He had no choice but to keep to his path to the undercroft. He was sure, though, that anyone in his path would be able to see the anger bubbling over. He stormed into the undercroft and tried to calm down as he spoke with Dagna about armour adjustments for the Inquisition's soldiers. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------

Ella wasn't quite sure what she had done wrong. She had been managing over the last few days with the nobles around, but when she saw Cullen in the main hall she found herself weak and wanting to run to him. She thought for a moment maybe he would come to her aid, make up some excuse for her to exploit and get away for a few minutes. It had been driving her crazy not being able to talk to him. What she wouldn't give for some conversation about military strategy or trebuchets - anything! Ellanora found herself concerned and confused when she saw Cullen suddenly so angry, his face crimson and stalking aggressively towards the undercroft. She wondered what she had done to illicit such a reaction. She wanted to excuse herself and follow him to the undercroft - to see how he was doing, to see if she had done something wrong, when Josie arrived with some other "important" person to introduce to her. Ella sighed quietly. She would have to wait to find the time to speak with Cullen, but at the rate she was at, it seemed a distant improbability.

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Cullen stood in the doorway of his office, leaning against the stone frame. Skyhold had appeared to slow down, and the sun was lowering - creating a beautiful raw outline of the mountain peaks surrounding. Cullen pondered his day, his encounter with those awful nobles. How anyone could think such things of a woman who was risking her life to save the world, was beyond him. The scars she received in battle are not flaws, but tales of bravery. Her mark is a constant reminder of Andraste choosing her and also the key to solving their current predicament. She was kind, her humbleness endearing, and her devotion to their cause - inspiring. To Cullen, she was perfect.

Cullen tried to push the noble's comments out of his mind and focus on the blessing this woman has been in his life. Before he could further his count of the things he loved about her, he saw her. Still in her regal dress from that afternoon, rushing out of the main doors, down the stairs to the lower courtyard. She tip toed around the nobles surrounding Bonny Sims' merchant stand to the stairs near the kitchen. She took one last look behind her to be sure no one had followed or noticed her, before shutting the door behind her. Cullen's curiosity got the best of him and he found himself descending the stairs from his tower on route to the kitchens.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------

Ellanora went quickly to work on her soaps upon entering the kitchen. She pulled them down from the drying racks and began to cut into the slabs. She heard the door behind her open and close, and she took a deep breath expecting to have to explain herself. His voice was ridiculously sultry and smooth, it made the hair on her neck stand up. "Had about enough, Inquisitor?" She was certain no one had seen her enter the kitchens and she wondered how he found her. She quickly dismissed that train of thought as she found she didn't care, she was just happy to see him. She decided to try to qualm her wide smile before turning to face him. "Whatever do you mean, Commander? I live for this type of thing. The past few days have been enlightening and quite special to me." She stared at him so 'matter-of-fact' he looked confused and almost hurt at her words. She let a grin slowly spread across her lips and he met hers with his own. "Sarcasm? Really, Inquisitor? It's so unbecoming." He leaned against the counter with his arms supporting his weight behind him with his cheeky grin. "I think sarcasm has been the only thing getting me through this. Most of the nobles think I'm completely serious - which to me is hilarious, but I suppose could be dangerous. I may have accidentally accepted a marriage proposal or two." Ella laughed at her own comment but noted how Cullen laughed briefly before looking immediately distracted. 

She stepped towards the fire and rummaged through a crate before producing a bottle. Dark brown with no label or notes, just a triangle drawn on the cork. Ella opened the bottle and set two glasses down beside Cullen and began to pour. "West Hill Brandy," Ella stated. She was standing so close to him, close enough to just reach out and touch. She handed him the glass and looked at him. They clinked them together without a word and emptied their glasses. Ellanora turned her body and leaned against the counter just as Cullen had, on his right. She let her head hang low and her hair which had fallen out of it's elegant updo, fell around her face. She exhaled loud. "So how have you actually been doing, Ella?" Something about his voice, drowning in genuine concern and compassion, made her open up. "The past few days have been, er.. difficult. I'm reminded in a lot of ways of the Trevalyans and I find myself thinking about where I might be if things hadn't happened the way they happened. I also find myself thinking a lot about my brother, Erik." Cullen shifted his weight and turned slightly to her. "Have you two been in contact recently?" Ella in that moment looked so sad, he wished he could wrap her in his arms and take away whatever awful feeling she was experiencing. "I wrote to him some time ago.. I told him about our family reaching out to me and coming here, I asked him to visit when they do, to help me. I told him I wanted to see him desperately and I haven't heard anything back yet. It's not like him to not respond, and I haven't had the time to see him at the University. I just.. miss him." Cullen was unsure of what to say - he could tell this was hurting her but he was unsure of what comfort he could offer her. "uh.. Ella, I'm sure he's just been busy at the university and is planning to write you. You two sound like you're quite close, I'm sure if he could be here he would want to be ----" Leliana suddenly burst into the kitchen. She rolled her eyes immediately before interrupting Cullen. "There you two are -- war room meeting, now." Cullen and Ella both opened their mouths to object, or state they'd be right there to at least finish their conversation but Leliana objected before a word could be formed. "Let's go, Josie is waiting." Ella shared a look with Cullen before they pushed off the counter and followed their spymaster out of the kitchens to the war room.

The four of them spent the next hour discussing Crestwood. The plan was for Ella to leave the next day to meet Hawke and his mysterious Warden friend in addition to responding to reports of demon activity in the area. The group finalized details before calling the meeting adjourned. Ella left to inform her friends of who would be joining her on their next journey and Leliana was heading out to return to some correspondence. "Lady Ambassador, do you have a moment?" Cullen was rubbing the back of his neck nervously. "Of course, Commander. How may I be of assistance?" Cullen waited until Leliana and Ellanora had completely left the room before proceeding. "I have an idea I'd wish to discuss with you.. I require your assistance and your.. discretion."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's Cullen upto??? ;) ;)


	36. Crestwood

Ellanora, Solas, Cassandra and Varric left the following morning for Crestwood. It was a beautiful morning at Skyhold, mostly because Ella saw nobles packing their carriages and mules to leave. She took solace in knowing by the time she returned her home would be vacant of the vermin. Ella thought she saw Cullen overseeing her departure from the battlements, but she couldn't be certain. She hoped in any case it was him, and she - as she did whenever she left Skyhold - wished him good health in her absence. The journey would only take them one hard day of travel, but they found their time extended by stopping to close rifts along the way. It was two days of travel before meeting Harding in Crestwood. Ella and her party went quickly to work killing the undead that encircled the village.

My dearest Advisors,

Crestwood, Crestwood, Crestwood. Let me start off by saying I am never coming here again. It's rainy, it's cold, it's just damned depressing. Next time could you send me somewhere warm? Somewhere the sun shines and there aren't undead everywhere? Much appreciated.Leliana, I need you to launch a man-hunt for Crestwood's mayor, Gregory Dedrick. Turns out he flooded Old Crestwood years ago killing refugees he believed were afflicted with the blight. We had to clear out a rift and kill many a undead to free the land and help the people, and the jerk fled. I would like to meet him in Skyhold for a little conversation, if you could arrange it. We still have a few days before meeting Hawke and his friend, so tomorrow we are going to investigate Caer Bronach. Apparently it's infested with bandits who are affecting trade routes and the village folk. When will they learn? Hopefully once that is taken care of we can meet Hawke and find out what is going on with the Wardens, and then I can get out of this dreary place.  
Indignantly yours,  
-Ellanora

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Inquisitor,

Leliana wishes me to inform you that she has begun her search for the Gregory Dedrick and will produce results by the time you arrive back in Skyhold. I am eager myself to hear his explanation of this unfortunate incident. I'm sorry to hear you're so miserable in Crestwood. The region tends to rain quite a bit, but you may see some sunshine yet. This job may not lead you to the most glamorous of places but always remember this: at least it's not the Storm Coast. Now, to the official reason I'm writing - I pray to Andraste this raven reaches you before you approach Caer Bronach. I'm sending a group of both Inquisition soldiers and Leliana's recruits to Crestwood to meet you and your party there. Not only is the strong hold incredibly well fortified but due to it's size and design it's a nightmare to overtake without solid numbers in both close and ranged weaponry. Additionally, they will assist in establishing Caer Bronach as an official Inquisition hold. Please, Ella, hold off on your approach until our soldiers can join you - they shouldn't take more than a day.  
Awaiting your reply,  
Cullen

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cullen,  
my apologies but I did not receive your missive until after our return to camp. If I had, I can now surely say I would have taken your advice. Caer Bronach is ours, however we did pay a price. Solas was injured in battle. He's on the mend, but he took a poisoned dagger to his right side. The poison has been counter-acted but the wound was deep. He needs time to heal, that's for sure. When we head south to meet Hawke I will be leaving him at camp to do so. There's.. one other thing.. When we were in battle, there was a lot of bandits. You were right, that place is tricky with it's multiple levels and damned hidden doorways.. we were outnumbered to say the least. Cassandra and Varric were overwhelmed and Solas had just been injured... Three men were heading for me and I'm not sure if my fear or my anger affected the mark, but.. it .. did something. It's like it shot out this energy, and opened a mini-rift in the air and just.. sucked the bandits into it. This seems ridiculous to describe.. I had no control of it, but I suppose I must have if it only sucked up the bandits and not our friends. It has me worried. Solas is the one I would normally talk to about the mark but he is in and out of consciousness thanks to his injuries and I don't know what to make of it. I managed to kill nearly 10 men with the anchor, and I suppose, I just wanted to.. tell you. So that's what I'm doing. I promise the second Solas is awake I will press for his thoughts on this. The soldiers you sent arrived later this afternoon, and I have asked them to see to Caer Bronach and assess what we need to get it running for the Inquisition. Tomorrow we meet Hawke. Stay tuned for updates.Also, I don't mean to worry you, I just.. needed to tell someone I guess.  
Yours ever perplexed,  
-Ella

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Advisors,  
It's worse than we imagined. We met with Hawke's friend, Warden Stroud this morning. Apparently Corepheyus has used his influence to make every Warden hear the calling. They believe themselves to be dying and are either heading to the deep roads to battle anticipated darkspawn or are going to participate in a blood magic ritual to help stop future blights even if they are gone. Some 'noble final sacrifice'. We need to track down and stop Warden Commander Clarel. Stroud is under the impression this will take place in an ancient Tevinter tower in the Western Approach. I'm leaving Crestwood as soon as Solas is well enough for travel. Please make travel plans for the Western Approach and prep any additional tasks for that trip. We have to get there soon to stop this madness. Their intentions seem well but blood magic is NEVER the answer. I'll ask again, when will they learn? Stroud told me every Warden in Orlais is experiencing the calling including himself, can someone please check in on Blackwall? Stroud described it as "the wolf in the shadows around the campfire." Please send me a report back on Blackwall's status, and bear in mind he may deflect initially, but I want a full report.  
Yours unwavering,  
-E

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Ella,  
I am relieved to hear you are unharmed after claiming Caer Bronach. I am sorry Solas has been injured, I realize you two are quite close and I hope he heals promptly. I do implore you to inquire with him regarding your mark when he is well. I am pleased you chose to confide in me about what happened. I find myself, however, at a loss of words and unaware of how to make sense of it all. I would be eager to hear from Solas and perhaps Dagna, at your discretion. As far as this news about the Wardens, we have been discussing plans for the Western Approach. I am incredibly disappointed to hear the Wardens are looking to follow Commander Clarel's plans. I recommend at this time reaching out to King Alistair and the Hero of Ferelden on conduct for the Wardens moving forward. Plenty to discuss upon your arrival, Inquisitor. I think amiss all the bad news, you'll find relief in knowing the nobles are all gone from Skyhold. Your sanctuary remains.  
Awaiting your return,  
Cullen


	37. Ring Side

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I know this is a short chapter - it used to be longer but I needed to edit it to facilitate some changes and so I just split it and posted this one to tide you over until I finish re-writing the other half. I'm hoping to have the other complete today or tomorrow.

Solas healed faster than the healer's anticipated, thus they began their journey back home. Since Ella had told him about the rift magic, he hadn't stopped theorizing nor asking hundreds of questions. No matter how many times Ella explained that it wasn't a spell she knew how to cast, Solas insisted she try to conjure it again for him to observe. It was a full day of travel before arriving at Skyhold's gates and Ella found herself happy to be home, and ready to put some distance between her and Solas. She was happy he was better and grateful he could help but it was just a lot to take at once. This rift magic scared her and Solas wasn't exactly the comforting type. Solas took off to his rotunda and Cassandra walked the mounts back to the barn with Inquisition soldiers. "Want to grab a drink, Varric?" Ella stretched her neck from side to side cracking it slightly. "Would love to, but I'm almost finished Swords and Shields - can't wait to see Seeker's face. Priorities, Inquisitor." Varric headed to the main hall and Ella wandered off to the upper courtyard.

Her eyes caught some commotion in the courtyard, she found a crowd gathering at the new sparring ring. As she approached she found The Iron Bull in one corner, a glass boot of mead in his hand, and the other corner, three Inquisition soldiers. The soldiers were battered and bruised and clearly inebriated. Before she could figure out what was happening two soldiers charged at Iron Bull. Bull stood his ground and swept them clear of him with one arm, knocking them to the ground. The crowd cheered and Iron Bull laughed and took another swig from his boot. Bull looked out ahead of the crowd and released a loud sigh. Ella turned her line of sight to match his and understood why.

There he was, tall and statuesque. The Commander of her army. He took long strides towards the ring, looking annoyed and alert. He had not, however, noticed Ella amongst the crowd. "Bull! What have I told you about engaging the new recruits?" Iron Bull merely shrugged his shoulders and smiled. "Whaaat? They were _learning_." Cullen furrowed his brow and shook his head. "You - keep your teaching exercises for the Chargers and leave the recruits to me. Go on men, to the barracks - do I need to remind you of tomorrow morning's drills? Off with you!"

Ella didn't often get to see Cullen in his role without him knowing she was there. He was so.. well.. commanding. It sent a shiver through her whole body seeing him with such authority. It was, undoubtedly, the shiver that had her feeling suddenly _very_ bold. As the crowd dissipated and Cullen watched his men stalk off to the barracks, she crept behind him. She watched him bring his hand to his forehead and pinch his brow. "What _drills_ do you have planned, Commander?" Ella immediately felt her cheeks redden. She watched Cullen's back straighten, his shoulders shift backward. He turned to face her with a sultry grin pulling that godforsaken scar upward, teasing her. He seemed genuinely happy to see her. She melted before him. Her boldness and confidence almost completely taken away with a simple smile.

"Ella! Um... Inquisitor, that is, I wasn't aware you had returned yet to Skyhold." He quickly adjusted his posture and his tone to be more professional. Ella laughed. Her eyes frozen on the echo of his smile. She stepped up on the ring fence and swung her other leg across, jumping into the ring. She walked towards Iron Bull with a swing in her step, knowing Cullen would be watching her. She stepped up to Bull and took the boot from his hand and took a long sip. Bull chuckled, punched Ella in the arm and stepped out of the ring and off to the Tavern. Ella walked toward the ring fence and leaned her body against it facing Cullen. "Arrived just now. Care to join me in the ring, Commander?" He hesitated for a moment, looking around at the crowd now further and further away. He put his arms on the ring fence and swung his legs over in one quick movement. It jolted Ella how fast he moved. She knew based on his Templar training he would be strong and powerful, but his speed took her by surprise. He walked up to her and took the boot from her hand and finished it. He stepped closer toward her and in a low voice asked, "How are you doing, Ella?" She found his tone endearing and his concern thick. She hesitated. She was lost in his amber eyes. She didn't know what she was expecting but she wasn't expecting to suddenly feel so vulnerable. She started kicking the dirt around her feet and staring at the anchor on her hand. "I'm fine, I mean, everything's messed up but what else is new?.. The -uh nobles are gone so that's good news! So, yeah, I'm.. I'm fine."

Cullen leaned back against the fence and smiled, staring down at her feet. "You know, you always do that. You're the most powerful woman in Thedas and yet you downplay your feelings and fears. You can talk about it, you know, I'll always be.. here for you. That is, if you want.. " Ella felt touched and grateful to have Cullen in her life. She believed his words and took them to heart. After her day travelling with Solas, however, she did not feel like talking about it. "Thank you, Cullen. I know you are - but right now, I don't much feel like talking." She let her tone drop slightly and watched him shift uncomfortably in his stance. She realized she was somehow making him nervous. Perhaps what she told him about the mark, or perhaps the flirting was too much. She was his boss for goodness sakes, of course he was becoming uncomfortable. She quickly turned and grabbed two wooden practice swords from a bucket in the corner, throwing one to Cullen. "How about that training session, Commander?" She smiled earnestly and stepped around him, trying to bait him into her challenge. Cullen put both the boot and the wooden sword down, looking apologetic. "Apologies, my lady. It is quite late and I have work yet to complete. Perhaps we can reschedule?" Ella put away her wooden sword too, nodding her head, no doubt looking disappointed. "Not a problem, Commander. I think I shall just head off to my quarters, then. Goodnight."

Before she could reach the ring fence, Cullen caught her hand. Her marked hand. Most people avoided even being near the anchor - let alone touching it. She turned to face Cullen, his hand wrapped still wrapped around hers. His face was half lit by the moonlight, his features appearing softer to match the tone of his voice. He spoke slowly, the words pouring out like syrup. "Get a good night's rest, Ella. I have a feeling things will soon start looking up for you. Goodnight." She met his eyes and he let go of her hand. She could only nod and smile slightly. Between the sight of him, the genuinely kind words and the closeness in which they stood, she could not form words. She climbed over the ring fence, and headed off to the stairs. Before heading into the great hall she turned to see Cullen climbing the stairs to the battlements. Once he reached the top he met her gaze and Ella waved him goodnight enthusiastically. He nodded and carried on to his tower. Ella jogged to her quarters, flopped down on her bed and thought about his sweet words, and asked herself why in the hell she waved at him. She sunk her head into a pillow and just about screamed at her stupidity. _Most powerful woman in Thedas and bloody waving at him like some blighted idiot. Good job, Ella._ She thought. Ella went to bed that night feeling silly, yes, but slept knowing she had people here who truly cared for her, and believed it would all be okay. And for a moment, she believed it too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ella's reached fangirl statussssss *eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee* hahaha She's on my level now hahaha


	38. Swords and Shields ...literally

Ella woke up the next morning to her helpers bringing her tea. She hopped out of bed and got to work immediately on correspondence at her desk. She worked for an hour or so before heading to the War room. There, Ella and her advisors discussed plans to head to the Western Approach. Ella shared with Josephine and Leliana what happened to her mark in Crestwood and elected to have Solas in her company for all of her ventures until they learned more about her new ability and how to control it. Ellanora figured this would also make Cullen happy, knowing someone who could understand the mark was watching over her. The group decided she would depart in two day's time as it would take them about a week to reach the Western Approach. The sooner they could fix this Warden problem, the better. Ella stepped out of the War room feeling confident and determined. Strolling into the great hall, Ella wondered how to strike up a non-business conversation with Cullen. He strode out of the corridor and nodded to Ella on his way to his office. She found herself speechless, struggling to say something to make him stop, but found she came up empty. Luckily, Varric was in the great hall and waved her over to him. "All finished and ready for delivery, Inquisitor." He held the latest edition of Swords and Shields in his hands, a ridiculous smile on his face. "Let's go, Varric. Try not to gloat too much, hey?"

They headed down the stairs and nearly skipped towards the sparring field. Cassandra was attacking a dummy while speaking to Dorian and Ella questioned momentarily if this was the best timing. Cassandra must have heard their arrival and turned to face them. She looked suspiciously at Varric, narrowing her eyes. "What have you done now?" 

"Here," Varric said as he passed the book to Cassandra. Her eyes widened and her fingers brushed against the cover. Varric laughed before continuing, "I hear you're a fan."

Ellanora and Dorian laughed "This is your doing." Cassandra pointed at Ellanora. She looked furious. Ella laughed, "Oh yes, did you really think I'd miss this?" Ella smiled at the Seeker although the sentiment was not returned. Dorian stepped in, "Ah, yes I had almost forgotten you were interested in this vile literature - no offence, Varric."

Varric laughed, "No offence taken, Sparkler, that book is easily the worst I've written." Dorian and Varric laughed as Cassandra paced around them. "I couldn't finish the last one you lent me, Seeker, I actually feel dumber for having tried," Dorian said before walking off toward the Tavern with a smile. 

"Nobody asked you, Tevinter. And you!" Cassandra once again pointed to Ellanora. "You were supposed to keep this a secret! You especially weren't supposed to tell Varric!" 

Cassandra slammed her sword into the tactic dummy and headed for the ring. Ellanora knew what was coming. The same thing Bull and Cassandra had done for her, Ella would now have to do for Cassandra : Anger management. She wandered to the ring feeling incredibly nervous. Ellanora couldn't hold a candle to Cassandra's fighting style or speed, but she recognized what her friend needed in this moment. She understood Cassandra might be frustrated with her for telling Varric, but she had figured she'd be happy with the end result - the finished chapter. As she picked up a practice sword and stepped into the ring she understood how she may have been a bad friend to Cassandra in this situation. Ellanora took a deep breath and prepared herself for what she anticipated to be a hearty fight.

Cassandra's assault was brazen and non-stop. Ellanora struggled to keep up her defense. Cassandra swung her sword randomly, her strikes without pattern, it became impossible for Ella to predict what was coming next. Cassandra struck high first, then low trying to knock out Ella's feet from under her. Ellanora was absorbing Cassandra's blows with her sword and backing herself up against the fence constantly, the ring confining her more and more. Cassandra faked a high strike and as Ellanora was focused on blocking, she body-checked Ellanora into the ring fence. Skyhold's citizens and Inquisition soldiers were beginning to head toward the ring, but Ellanora's focus caught Varric steering observers away from the ring. "A private affair," he was declaring, and they moved on. Ellanora tore her eyes away from Varric and the crowd quickly enough to spin away from Cassandra swinging her sword toward Ella's stomach. Ella was still leaning against the ring fence, catching her breath, watching Cassandra stalk around her, clearly still upset and angry. Cassandra gave Ella about 4 seconds to rest before launching her second aggressive assault. Ella had no other position in this fight other than defensive - Cassandra was giving her all she had. Ellanora clutched her sword, worried it would fall out of her sweaty palms. Cassandra swung her sword over her head and descended it down onto Ella. Ella blocked it in the knick of time and as she held her sword above her, thwarting the assault, Cassandra kicked Ellanora in the ribs. Ella fell to her knee and Cassandra dropped her weapon in the mud. She exhaled loudly, and although she was in pain, Ella understood the sound of relief and release in her tone. Ella stayed on her knee momentarily, collecting her breath and waiting for the pain to subside. She heard footsteps behind her.

"You know, I expected the Herald of Andraste would have better moves than that." Ellanora recognized that voice. She remained still, knelt, in disbelief and shock. It couldn't be. She stood, slowly and saw Cassandra in front of her, smiling. Ellanora turned around and found no other than her twin brother, Erik, standing before her. She winced at the pain as she lept over the ring fence toward her brother. "What are you...? How did you...? I am so happy to see you!!" She hugged Erik like it was simultaneously the first hug in a long time and the last hug they'd ever share. She did not let him go. Cassandra and Varric chuckled as they observed their dear friend clearly suddenly so connected to someone who was so dearly missed. Ellanora reluctantly released Erik and proudly introduced him to Cassandra and Varric. Dorian and Iron Bull were standing near the Tavern entrance and she waved them over to be introduced. There was so much to catch up on, so much to share. So much of Skyhold to show Erik and too many drinks to be had, Ellanora hadn't even considered what or who brought Erik finally to her. She felt euphoric, like she was floating, or not really all there... She was so, so happy..


	39. No Credit Necessary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 2 am and I really wanted to get this posted for you guys. I'm just gonna say one thing. And I quote "EEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!"  
> Love you guys - thank you SO MUCH for reading and commenting!!

Ella had spent the rest of the day showing Erik around Skyhold. She introduced him to some of her companions and friends. They found themselves drinking at the Tavern around dinner-time. 

"I'm sorry I hadn't written you back, Ella. I found myself overwhelmed at the University and I didn't quite know how to wrap my head around what is going on. I still don't. What the hell is going on?"

"Oh you know, the world is under siege by a darkspawn magister looking to claim god-liness. And I've been given the wondrous opportunity to stop the bastard and save the world. You know - the usual."

Ella threw her drink back, truly realizing the words she was speaking. This was her life now.

Erik sighed. "Well. That's... insane." Ella suddenly laughed at Erik's ability to make something massive seem like no big deal. He continued, "So, what's happening with the Trevelyans? Are Father and Alessia coming to visit you here?"

Ella found herself staring at her empty glass and frustrated. Fortunately, Cabot noted this quickly and placed a pint before her. Ellanora took a generous swig of her drink and exhaled loudly. "They wrote to me, as I mentioned. We haven't made any plans. Josie and I keep finding ways to dodge their attempts to come here. I just don't know what they are after. It makes me sick just to speculate." Ella took another sip before declaring, "I don't know what they want, I just wish they would leave me alone!"

Erik put his arm around his sister's shoulders and she let herself fall into his chest. It had been a long, long time since she had been genuinely comforted and she felt safety and calm being with her brother. He squeezed her into his grasp slightly, and she asked, "Well, you've seen most of Skyhold, you've met some of my friends - what do you think?"

Erik kissed Ella on the head and took a deep breath before speaking, "Ella, I oddly think you are right where you belong."

Ella sat up straight, out of his grasp and looked at her older brother - older by two whole minutes. "What do you mean?" Erik picked up his drink and had a small sip before elaborating. "Ella, when we discovered your magic... it was hard to imagine you going off to the circle. It was hard to just classify you a mage. But even years later, visiting you there, you still didn't suit the mold. You always seemed like you were destined for more. Besides, the chances of you being chosen to represent the circle at the conclave, surviving, and to top it off - being Andraste's chosen.. those are insane odds. Yet, fitting for you. You have always been extraordinary and so obviously deserving of more. I am so proud of you."

Ella was not prepared to have her brother recognize her struggle and her sacrifice. She wiped a tear from her eye and took in a long, shaky breath. She didn't know what to say. Ella felt vulnerable and - at the same time - so ridiculously happy that her brother was right there with her. It had been since she was at the Circle that she had seen him. She felt another sneaky tear roll down her cheek before hearing Dorian's taunting tone interrupt her emotions from forming.

"See, Bull? I told you, Erik is clearly the better looking twin!" Dorian and The Iron Bull sat down at their table, laughing. Ella lifted her right hand over her heart and whined, "Oh how you wound me, Dorian." Cabot promptly delivered a bottle of wine and another bottle of questionable substance and origin. 

"What is this?" Erik asked, picking up and inspecting the bottle.

"Better off not knowing - just drinking" Bull declared, picking up the bottle from Erik's grasp and pouring a glass. Ellanora shook her head and handed Erik a glass of wine instead. He accepted and the four of them continued to share drinks, stories and eventually dinner together. It wasn't until their third game of wicked grace that Ella decided to call it a night. "You know, Bull - Hawke advised me not to play cards with Qunari - cos' you can never tell when they're bluffing. I realize now, I should have listened. I fold." Ellanora planted her cards onto the table and took the last sip of her drink. "Come on, Erik. You can have my bed and I'll crash on the couch until we can talk to Josie about a room, tomorrow."

Erik cheerfully took a sip from his drink, still holding his cards in his hands. "I have a room, actually. It's all been arranged. Your ambassador informed me when I arrived and had my belongings taken to it." Ella was floored. All these hours spent catching up and she hadn't even asked how Erik got to Skyhold. "So Josie brought you here, from the University?"

"No, Josie only met my arrival. It was your Commander. Cullen, I think his name."

Ella could not believe what she was hearing. "Cullen??? Are you sure?"

Erik laughed, "Of course I'm sure! The man met me in Val Royeaux and brought me here himself. Quite a nice fellow, I might add."

Ella felt her jaw drop. She was so moved, so genuinely touched. He had listened to how she missed her brother and Cullen sought him out himself. Oh and how Cullen hated Val Royeaux! She felt a lump in her throat and her eyes watering. She placed her hands on the table and slowly stood up. She exchanged knowing glances from Erik, Dorian and The Iron Bull as she mumbled, "Excuse me a moment, boys."

She took off in a run, patrons making way for her as Dorian yelled "We won't wait up, darling!"

Ella felt her heart pounding in her chest as she climbed the battlement's stairs, two by two. She wasn't thinking, she was reacting. Her heart was so swollen with emotion - seemingly bursting within her. She threw open the doors that stood in her way to his office. She didn't care who she was interrupting or what onlookers would think. 

After what seemed an eternity, she reached the door to Cullen's office, and she rushed the door. There he was, both hands on his desk, overseeing some map, talking to several Inquisition soldiers about strategy or something - she found herself only able to hear her own heartbeat thrumming in her ears. They all looked up at Ella from her sudden entry.

"It was you!" Ella declared, perhaps too loud, and too out of breath. Cullen waved his hand at the soldiers as he stared at Ella, bewildered. They understood and headed for the door. Cullen followed them towards the door and closed it behind them. "Inquisitor, I don't know what.."

"You brought my brother to Skyhold!"

Cullen's left hand rose to his neck, remaining there as he spoke. "I - uh.. well, yes.. I.. knew you wanted to see him." He appeared to be shifting his weight from left to right, apparently nervous. He looked at Ellanora momentarily before returning his gaze to the floor.

"You went to Val Royeaux and brought him to me." Ella took three steps towards him.  
Cullen cleared his throat and removed his hand from his neck. "Well, I .. had to. I didn't want every blasted noble hearing turn for turn directions to Skyhold from some hired coachman. It was uh.. a security precaution of sorts. Besides, it was just a few hours' trip."

Ella's heartbeat still challenged her breathing. She still felt herself holding back tears of happiness - she was moved to such a vulnerable place from his actions. She felt she would explode if she didn't act. Her heart called - no, SCREAMED to her for action. She could no longer ignore it. She was still out of breath from her own deliverance to his office. She nearly ran into him, placed her hands on either side of his face, tilted his chin a little higher, and _kissed_ him.

Her mind was swimming, her breath cut short. Although the build up was no doubt hurried, the kiss felt like time had stopped. It was like the stars, the moon, the constellations he had shown her, were aligning with that moment. She felt her heart expanding, no longer exploding. The moment sang to her, serenading her with anticipation fulfilled. His lips were soft and gentle, welcoming - despite the surprise. She clung to this moment like air and her heart ached already missing it as she slowly pulled away from it. 

Opening her eyes as she pulled her lips away from his, she saw his own eyes closed. She slowly removed her hands from his handsome face and rested them on his chest. He opened his eyes and met hers. She smiled.

"Thank-you, Cullen." She barely whispered. Ella figured if history had taught her anything, Cullen would transform to Commander again very promptly. She didn't want his professional demeanor to ruin that wondrous moment, so she slowly backed away from him, returning her hands to her sides, yet keeping her eyes on him. As she did, he just looked on - clearly surprised and taken aback. 

Ellanora sighed. Her body, her heart, her soul begged her to return to him but she fought back with all her might. She reached for the doorknob, and turned to him once more before leaving the room. "Goodnight, Cullen." She muttered, with a smile. Closing the door behind her she felt a blush rise to her cheeks and a giddy laugh grow in her abdomen. 

Ella held no interest in returning to the Tavern. She just kept walking, taking in the night, the stars, every moment that she spent with her lips on his and every feeling it rendered. Nothing in her life so far had thrilled her like that moment, that experience, that kiss.

Ella continued to walk the battlements, aimlessly, with the biggest smile on her face.

\------------------

Cullen stood there, dumbfounded for a few minutes. Minutes that felt like hours. His lips feeling stung from hers yet crying for their return. His head was spinning. He was not expecting that. In fact he asked Erik not to disclose details of his arrival to Ella. Cullen just wanted Ella to be happy, no credit necessary.

But now, in the echo of her touch - not only her lips on his, but her hands on his face, his neck.. his chest.. He felt so suddenly lost without her in the room. He finally snapped back to reality and ran for the door. He was met with only darkness. He took a few steps onto the battlements looking around, before realizing Ellanora was probably back at her quarters, and he wouldn't disturb her there.

Her cursed himself for not going after her sooner. If he had, he could have kissed her again, shown her how he truly felt about her. But he had been frozen - his reality numbed by the dream that she was, and the power she held over him in that moment. He returned to his office re-living every second of her soft lips on his. How she smelt, how she said his name, rang in his head incessantly. Cullen knew this to be a sleepless night for him - but for once he knew he wouldn't be tossing and turning from lyrium dreams - he was happy to re-count every moment in his mind, savoring every feeling the woman he loved created and unleashed.


	40. In the Name of Work

Cullen spent the night tormented by visions of Ellanora's death. He hoped he would experience dreams of her, dreams reliving the magical moment her lips touched his. He was wrong to have been so confident. He tossed and turned and the nightmares grew stronger, louder.. more gruesome. He dreamt of a dark magic taking Ellanora by surprise, taking her away from soldiers and her party. He dreamt this magic withheld her own and kept her powerless against it. He envisioned a poisonous blade, stabbed into her abdomen again and again and again, and he watched her suffer, trying to fight the poison seeping into her blood. He awoke with a jolt, out of breath and sweat on his brow. His breath came in hot, like daggers. He tried to calm down, catch his breath to no avail. He jumped out of bed and began to dress. He put on a loose tunic, pants and boots. He slid down the ladder from his quarters and walked out his office to the battlements. The cold air felt good on his hot skin. His breath began to gain control as he walked. He walked down to the furthest point of the battlements. He looked up and could see some light from Ellanora's quarters and exhaled a sigh of relief, knowing she was safe. Even if just for now. He knew his title as Commander required him here, prevented him from going to the Western Approach, but he vowed to do anything in his power to protect her. His mind began to race thinking of his original selection of soldiers to send to the Western Approach. He headed back to his office to revise his choices and review their skillsets. Only the best would accompany her, only the best for her. Cullen did not sleep the rest of the night. He continued to work until it was time for the War Meeting. 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ella hardly slept. She found herself recounting the evening, reliving every moment, every bit of excitement. She dressed for the day and remembered that Erik was in Skyhold - all thanks to her Commander. She smiled to herself and pondered having a late breakfast with Erik after her War Council meeting. Maybe she could invite Cullen - he did say long ago he wondered what Ellanora was like as a child. She wrote a quick invitation to Erik and had her helper deliver it to him before skipping down to the War Room to meet her advisors. She collected a deep breath before pressing through the large wooden door - reminding herself it was time for business. She couldn't help the butterflies in her stomach brought on by knowing Cullen stood behind the door. She entered, doing her best to calm her nerves.

"Inquisitor - good timing, we were just discussing the Western Approach." Leliana ushered Ellanora into the room and to her place across the War table. Cullen and Josephine stood across from them. Josephine offered a sweet smile and nodded in Ella's direction. Ellanora turned her gaze to Cullen who had his head down, looking at the table. She cleared her throat and yet he still did not look up. She brushed it off thinking he too involved in thought, perhaps. 

"Uh, yes.. Well then, what plans remain to be made?" Ellanora squared her shoulders and entered what she liked to call, 'Inquisitor mode.' Leliana paced around the table and declared, "Your armour is being treated today and will be ready come tomorrow. You shall leave at dawn to make good time. Hawke and Warden Stroud have already arrived at the Western Approach as has Scout Harding. The correspondence we have received from all parties does not bode well. Dragons, bandits and of course, the suspected gathering of a Venatori presence, is just the top of the list. We must find out what is happening with the Wardens. Have you thought about who you are bringing to accompany you?"

Ellanora crossed her arms and walked around the table toward the window. She leaned her body against the stone frame and peered out the stained glass. "Yes, I have. I want Solas with me. We have yet to discover the nature of the mark's odd power from our last journey. Dorian as well. And lastly, after reading your positive report on his condition, I'd like to invite Warden Blackwall. I believe this to be the best equipped group based on what we can anticipate."

Cullen laughed outright. "Inquisitor - you cannot seriously be considering having three mages in your party, you included! What if you run out of lyrium potions? What then -- the three of you stand around while Blackwall cuts down the enemy by himself? What if you are overrun? What if the Calling affects Blackwall all of a sudden? There are too many possibilities for injury. I beg you to consider The Iron Bull or Seeker Cassandra for this venture. Someone more.. formidable."

Ellanora found herself confounded. First, the sudden coldness and now him challenging her decision. She felt his argument had some validity however she did not appreciate his laughter at her choice nor his painted image of mages. Ellanora was proud that she was a mage and also knew how to handle a sword if the situation warranted it. She felt confused, unsure if she should protest his argument or agree with his logic. She took a breath to speak but was interrupted by Leliana.

"Commander Cullen, how has the training of your new soldiers been coming? I understand they have been stationed to accompany the Inquisitor on this journey?" Leliana gave Ellanora a knowing look and moved on to look at Cullen.

Cullen's hand found the back of his neck and he cleared his throat before speaking, "They are undergoing more training with me this afternoon, but yes, they are coming along quite well. They shall leave Skyhold with the Inquisitor and her party and meet with Scout Harding and the other soldiers there." Cullen turned to face Ellanora. His expression looking so serious, no emotion, no softness. "We do not know what awaits you at these Tevinter ruins.. we must prepare blindly." He turned his body away from her again to study the war table and map. 

Josephine went on to discuss reparations and aid to be sent to land owners in Haven. "Now that the Inquisition is in better standing we are able to offer financial aid to those who lost property or farming land back in Haven. Most followed us here to Skyhold but some have returned to family in Ferelden and have nothing. I will see to their restitution." 

Josie continued discussing plans for Skyhold and nobles who had pledged themselves to their cause. Ellanora found herself not truly able to engage in the conversation. She kept her body turned away and nodded occasionally as she looked out the window. She could hear Josie talking, and she knew she was being rude not truly listening, but in her head, the entire evening she had enjoyed reliving, she now saw under a different light. She must have crossed a line with Cullen, perhaps that would explain his coldness. Or maybe he was just in 'Commander mode' himself, he always takes his work very seriously. Ellanora decided that must be it. She stopped overthinking it and tuned back in to Josephine, turning her body back to face her. They spoke for some time before calling the meeting adjurned. Leliana and Josephine left the room and Cullen was collecting his documents and maps. Ellanora tugged at her side braid and took a deep breath before approaching him. 

"Cullen.. I uh.. was going to get a late breakfast with Erik and I wondered if you'd like to.. that is, if you're not too busy.."

Cullen reached for the back of his neck as she delivered her adorable awkward invitation. He interjected before she could finish, "I have a lot of work to be done today, Inquisitor. I..I must see to the training of your soldiers this afternoon. I, uh.. do hope you enjoy your time with your brother before your journey tomorrow."

Ellanora nodded and flashed a small smile, trying not to look disappointed. It was foolish of her to assume he wouldn't have work to do. He always had work to do. Ella walked around the table and out the open door, hands clasped behind her back, wondering what she had gotten herself into. Hoping Cullen had only dismissed her for the sake of work, and not for the million other reasons going through her mind as she headed for the gardens to meet Erik.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> didn't think it was gonna be that easy, did ya? hahah
> 
> I'm not done with the build up quite yet. BUT dream sequence to come soon. I realize I haven't posted any smut in a while, so that'll be the next thing I'm working on :)


	41. Heart of Cole

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A meal, a fitting and a conversation with Cole.

Ellanora walked through the main hall to the gardens. Opening the door she took in the sight of the gardens. People coming and going, some others deep in seemingly pleasant conversation, spirits were high. "Ella! Good morning! Come see what your staff have prepared for us!" Erik stood before her and linked his arm to hers and lead her to the table the Inquisition staff had prepared for them at the gazebo. Ellanora reveled in this moment. Her brother on her arm, surrounded by the sweet smell of embrium on a beautiful day.. she felt truly blessed. Sitting down at the table, Ellanora said her thanks to her helper, Valerie, as she poured tea for Ella and Erik. 

"What a beautiful spread - thank you for arranging this. My, this is quite a lot of food for the two of us. I don't imagine we'll make a dent!" Erik laughed as he broke bread, his spirit was high and a smile remained on his face.

Ella picked up a butterie treat from the table and commented, "Well, I had implied that there may be another joining us, but I fear you're right - even with another person we wouldn't make a dent." Ellanora laughed lightly and sipped her tea.

"Who else was to join us?" Erik asked, now eyeing the third chair slightly off to the side from their table. Ella took a rather large bite before speaking, buying her some time. "..Dorian. I .. asked Dorian to join us, but I suppose he was preoccupied." 

Erik sat up in his chair and eyed his sister. "Interesting. I have just come from the library where Dorian and I were discussing the selection of books Skyhold carries. Funny, he did not mention having been invited to breakfast when I disclosed where I was off to. So then, who did you have in mind to join us, dear sister?"

Ella laughed at herself. She knew she was a terrible liar and Erik of course always knew. Ellanora tossed her bread down on her plate and leaned back in her chair. "Okay fine. After my counsel I had asked Commander Cullen if he would like to join us." Ellanora watched Erik raise his eyebrows and smirk at her before she continued, "Now, now Erik, get those thoughts out of your head. It's not like that."

Silence remained at their table for a short few moments while Valerie refilled their water goblets and tea mugs. After Valerie left Erik leaned in, towards Ella. "But you want it to be so, don't you? I can see it in your eyes. Why, might I ask, did he not join us? He seems interested in you enough."

Ella scoffed at his remark. "He is clearly not, as I've come to learn." She commented, thinking about the rejection she faced in the war room. She understood his role and the Inquisition as a whole was more important than her petty feelings, yet she still felt the sting of his sudden coldness and rejection.

Erik's words brought her away from her thoughts, "Well I don't think a man who isn't interested in you would embark all the way to Orlais to fetch you your brother. Your better looking, smarter than you twin brother." Erik kicked Ella under the table in jest and she smiled at his arrogance.

"Erik, I'd rather not discuss it. Anyway, he's a busy man. He has to train the soldiers this afternoon before we depart for the Western Approach tomorrow." Ellanora realized she was rationalizing moreso to herself than to Erik in that moment.

Erik suddenly looked at his sister with a more serious look to his face. "Ah yes, I wished to discuss your latest expedition. What awaits you in the Western Approach? Will this be a dangerous mission?" 

Ella rapped her fingers against her tea mug before sitting up straight and answering, "Truthfully, all of our missions are dangerous. I'm not sure you would believe me if I told you some of the things I've seen or things we have found and fought. This mission is a bit worrisome as we don't know exactly what it will entail. We are to meet Grey Wardens who are gathering at old Tevinter Ruins. We don't know at present if they are friend or foe, or what is really going on. You, however, can rest assured. My companions fight well and our soldiers have been trained by the best. You may lay claim of being better looking and smarter, but I have it on good authority I am the stronger, braver and more amazing twin - thankyouverymuch."

The siblings both laughed, feeling more relaxed about the circumstances, and went on to discuss lighter matters and enjoy their late breakfast. After their delicious meal and cheerful catch-up, Ella headed to the Undercroft to be fitted for her upgraded armour. Having just acquired Dagna the arcanist, new armour was constantly being crafted. Ellanora didn't care much for fittings but she figured she'd count her blessings this wasn't a formal dress fitting with corsets, bows, and crinoline. 

As Dagna clasped the new armour onto Ella, she considered which members of the Inquisition to include in her party. She considered Cullen's words. Did he really think she was that incapable without magic? Was he right in suggesting another warrior to accompany her? Her thoughts were interrupted by Dagna speaking in wonder, amazed at her own creation.

"And this part here, has a rune that will help resist fire.. ohh and the chest plate will resist magic without interfering with your own casts. Isn't it beautiful? Soooo shiny!"

Ellanora smiled at her enthusiastic, beaming friend. She bent down to face Dagna, and patted her on the shoulder and whispered, "Thanks for looking out for me." Dagna smiled adorably and met Ella's gaze before trailing off again. Dagna rambled on while her and Ella removed the armour and hung it back on the rack for necessary adjustments to be made. Saying her thanks once more to the dwarf, Ella made for the main hall. 

Ella let her thoughts roam and her feet lead her. Not truly focused on where she was going, nor finding her thoughts any clearer, she stalked the battlements. She found herself where she had originally met Hawke. She sat on the edge of the wall, swinging her long legs to hang toward the courtyard. Behind her she heard guards beginning to approach. She turned her head to acknowledge and smile at them. Recognizing it was her, they eyed her choice of seating but eventually turned and granted her space.

Below her, Ella could see the hustle and bustle of the courtyard. Skyhold's citizens greeting each-other, carrying baskets of goods to the merchants in the lower courtyard, The Bull's Chargers heading into the Tavern, and most memorably - the training drills being lead by Commander Cullen.

Ella leaned forward, placing her head in her hands, her arms resting on her knees. She watched Cullen demonstrate the proper use of a shield, and bark orders when not completed correctly. Whenever Ella oversaw Cullen's training exercises she felt excited and giddy by the speed and evident skill involved in each movement. Today, however, she felt glum and emotionally drained. Her mind racing, she still was unable to make a decision. She realized a part of her wanted to stick to her original suggestion of companions out of sheer stubbornness. She was frustrated that Cullen laughed at her. She had been thrust into this role and was doing the best she could, and found it difficult to let go of this apparent distrust in her decisions and capabilities. 

"You should tell him that." 

Ellanora nearly jumped at the sound of Cole's voice. "Andraste's tits, Cole! I'm sitting on a ledge! Do you not see me, sitting here.. on this ledge?! You frightened me!" Cole sat down beside her, pulling his knees toward his chest, hugging his legs. "I just wanted to help. You're so very loud today. Your thoughts keep circling. Round and round and round the same thought but the solution is clear. You should speak to him."

Ellanora brushed off Cole's words and brushed off the anxiety his arrival briefly caused. Sighing, she declared, "I don't know what you mean, Cole." Cole lifted his head to show Ellanora the expression of confusion registering under the brim of his hat. "You do, you do! You're both so loud! Your hurt and his guilt and both of your fears! They come in the night for him, once the sky turns black, shaking him to his core of what he can stand to see. And you - you carry your fear like a part of your armour, with you always until the day's end. Fear you're not enough for this, fear the Elder One will win, fear you'll never - "

"Cole, that's enough!" Ellanora found herself frustrated by the rouge. "I don't want to hear it. ..It isn't helping.." Ellanora felt bad for yelling at Cole, knowing he was just trying to help, but his ramblings didn't often make sense and she did not want to listen to her fears being read. "I'm leaving Cole, I have a lot to think about." Ellanora moved up from the edge of the wall and began to walk away. She stopped suddenly, having heard Cole softly, nearly under his breath, say "He only wants you to be safe. He just doesn't know how to say it. When he tries, he does it wrong." 

Ellanora smiled. She turned her head and nodded to Cole behind her and changed her course for the stairs. She was then off to find Solas, Blackwall and Cassandra to inform them of their journey to take place at next dawn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Cole so much and he's fun to write because you can be pretty weird with his dialogue and it still fits him haha Hope you guys love him too and like seeing him pop up abit more in my story. Dream sequence coming soon :) smutty smut smut!


	42. Brotherly Advice

Cullen trained the soldiers diligently. He pressed them, pushed them, did not let up. He had been running exercises all afternoon. The soldiers he had selected for tomorrow's journey were helping him train the new recruits. Cullen knew he wouldn't always be there to reassign their formation himself, he wanted to see the initiative and leadership they themselves possessed. 

He focused on the soldiers, on their every move to keep the guilt down. He had felt terrible for being so distant to Ellanora in the War room. Everytime he looked at her he saw flashes of her bloodied and cold body before him. Her eyes pleading in her last moments of life. He had to focus on the task at hand, he had to keep her safe. He realized he may have come across too strong but she didn't understand! She had to be safe, she had to make it back to Skyhold. He couldn't live knowing he didn't do everything in his power to protect his love. Even if she would never truly be his, he could not let her down, he could not let her walk into danger blindly. Truthfully, every mission - every time she left Skyhold he feared for her. This journey was different. A lack of intel or expectations of what to come just fed his dreams and fears more. Like a glacier feeds a lake, his fears felt an ocean deep. 

After a few hours of training he allowed the men a break. "Return at sunset for further training. Get some rest and some food. Come back refreshed and ready." The men nodded and began to disperse. Cullen was pleased to see the 6 soldiers he had assigned for tomorrow stuck around and practiced drills together while the new recruits stepped out of the ring. Cullen remained to watch, occasionally calling out suggestions and corrections. One soldier, Ryder - having joined after the devastation that was Haven, was having difficulty maintaining proper posture when in a defensive stance. Cullen headed into the ring, jumping over the fence to demonstrate, when looking up he thought he spotted Ellanora and Cole sitting on the edge of the upper battlements. He approached the soldier, instructing him to keep his strength in his back leg, and his front free to pivot or lunge forward, and had the soldier demonstrate to him. Leaving the ring feeling satisfied in the receiving of his instruction, he looked up again to find only Cole sitting there. He wondered if he had even seen Ellanora at all, or just his imagination showing him what he wanted to see.

Cullen shrugged it off as he equally tried to shrug off his feelings of guilt building up inside him. He wondered if he should speak with Ellanora before her departure. Although he doubted she would want to speak with him. Oh Maker, what had he done. Before Cullen was able to truly dive into his thoughts and fears there was a distinct cough behind him. "Ahem."

Cullen turned from the ring to find Erik standing before him. "Good-day Commander. Might I have a word?"

Cullen was surprised to see Erik, and walked over to the man. "But of course, Erik. What can I help you with?" Cullen asked as he wiped sweat from his brow.

Erik turned and the two men began to walk the courtyard. Erik seemed to be struggling with how to approach, but pushed on. "Commander, I..I am concerned for my sister. I know I have only just arrived to Skyhold and haven't bore witness to some of the things she, and the Inquisition have been through from the start, but I fear her safety when she heads out for a mission like tomorrow's. She tells me not to worry and speaks lightly of it, but I can't not worry; she is my little sister, my whole world and I am no warrior or soldier able to protect her. I suppose I am searching for some reassurance, or something, to help me know that she will come back to Skyhold in due course at the end of this journey." 

Cullen could tell this was weighing down on Erik for some time, as after he delivered his speech he exhaled, as if relieved to get it off his chest. Cullen nodded his head and paused before speaking. "Erik, do you see those soldiers in the ring, there?" Cullen waited for Erik to look over Cullen's soldier and nod. "Those soldiers joined us at different points of the Inquisition's uprising. Most of them in Haven but some once we arrived here, in Skyhold. When they joined us they didn't know how to hold a shield up let alone what you see them accomplishing now. For this venture a small group of soldiers is required and I have hand-picked 6 of our best. Their instructions are clear and absolute; to protect their Herald and Inquisitor, and your beloved sister. Trust me, Erik, I wish I were able to go on this - and every mission myself, in lieu of that, I am here, making sure these soldiers have mastered their skills, and know their mission." Cullen looked at Erik to find him staring at the soldiers, mesmerized by their motions and impressed by their skill. "Besides, you should see Ellanora in battle, she has a great memory for spells and strategizing exactly when to use which ones, it's impressive." Cullen brought his hand to his neck at his last comment, noting he was likely blushing as well. He realized he hadn't ever complimented Ella's magic or her nature in battle. This deeply embarrassed him internally.

Erik chuckled, and beamed at the man. He outstretched his hand and Cullen shook it. "Thank you, Commander. I am beyond pleased to hear that from you. It brings me great relief to know that she's being protected and is cared for." Erik grinned and released Cullen's hand. "You're a good man, Cullen. Although what you noted about Ella's skills in battle? I'm sure she'd love to hear that from you herself. ..Among other things. I'm off to the library - I'm working with Dorian to expand the collection of history books. Thank you for indulging me, Commander."

Erik nodded and began to walk away toward to main hall. Cullen found himself wondering exactly what Erik had implied. Shaking his head, he returned back to the ring to oversee his soldier's practice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Going to post another one tonight - just off to work and when I return I'll edit it and post. So excited for this next one guys - smut central. Get ready


	43. Role Playing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW  
> hehehheehheh enjoy!

Ellanora awoke and dressed in her chambers, ready to take on the day of travel to the Western Approach. Looking outside her window it was still pitch black but it was raining, hard, as she could tell from the sound of it pounding down on the stone balcony. Ella dressed, grabbed her pack and a second cloak before descending the stairs to exit her room. Stalking through the main hall she was surprised to see not a single soldier. She supposed it was before dawn but she still found it odd. She ran through the courtyard and down the stairs on her way to the stables, rain pouring down on her she cursed herself for not having gone through the kitchens. It then started hailing and Ella was holding her cloak over her head to avoid getting hit by the large balls of ice. The courtyard remained empty and even upon reaching the stables, no one was there. Not even Blackwall in the barn. Ellanora figured the group was running late and she hung around and pet the horses while she waited. She watched the hail beating down and the mud forming around the stables. The noise from the hail storm was absolutely deafening. The horses seemed spooked so she stayed with them, gently brushing their manes to soothe them. 

She thought she heard footsteps behind her, but turning her head nothing or no one had been produced. Turning back to the horses and yawning, she suddenly felt two hands on her waist, gripping her from behind. She turned to face the culprit and found Cullen's concerned eyes. His hair absolutely dishevelled and dripping wet, curling at the ends. He stood before her in a cream button up shirt and black pants. He eyed Ellanora with concern, and something else, in his eyes. "Cullen! You frightened me!" She exclaimed, noting that his hands still remained on her waist, now gripping her strongly by the hips. "I'm sorry, I just needed to see you. You must be safe, you must return to me." And with that said, he swept in and kissed Ellanora. His kiss was insistent, pleading with her. He pulled her to him with his strong hands, deepening the kiss. She closed her eyes and let her shock and surprise fade away into the kiss. Cullen pulled away momentarily, but still kept the closeness between them. "That's an order." Ella felt a chill affect her whole body causing a shiver reaction. 

Something about his tone and the authority he possessed over her as he slowly pushed her back toward a support beam of the stables, drove her wild. The back of her head hit the beam lightly and Cullen assaulted her neck with lingering kisses and love bites while his hands moved over her upper body. She found herself wanting even more of him and began to fiddle with the buttons on his simple cotton shirt. His chest now free from his shirt, her hands became curious and wandered across his chest, feeling his strong pecs and sculpted abs. Cullen's hands reached under her shirt for better access to her breasts. "Take me on the table." Ellanora breathed out, eyeing the table Blackwall had used for his woodwork. Ellanora laughed in her head at the pun. Cullen stopped kissing her neck and looked at her, "No." He growled. His lips were hot on hers and he gathered her hands in his. With his left hand, he held both her wrists above her, against the beam. He placed his right knee between her thighs encouraging her to move her legs into a wider stance. 

Cullen looked at Ellanora with a wild desire, and a smirk on his lips. He trailed his right hand from her shapely lips, down her face, over her breast, down her stomach and into her pants. His hand explored her now wet with arousal region but focused his attention on her sensitive pearl. He started slowly, watching Ella respond to his touch. Ellanora felt like she was in both heaven and hell - his touch varied from feather light to the firm control she loved. He was teasing her, bringing her close to release and then slowly taking it away with his tenderness. He kissed her neck the same way, soft wet kisses planted in just the right spot, then pinching hot bites here and there. Setting her over the edge was his rotation of such; while the rhythm of his hand was tender, his mouth was not, and the other way around. It was confusing but incredibly hot. Just as she would relax into his tender touch, a love bite would shock her onto sexual edge again. Ellanora moaned into the early morning air, thankful no one would hear her over the hail storm. Cullen lifted his head up and kissed her on the mouth as his hand focused on finally granting her the release she had been chasing. She found herself nearly there, her orgasm just around the corner. Cullen slowed again slightly and whispered in her ear "not until I say so, yes?" Ella would have agreed to just about anything in that moment if it meant he would increase his pace. "Yes.." She moaned.

Cullen watched her chest rise and fall, he could sense she was close. "Yes what?" He nearly growled and tightened his grip on her wrists above her. She looked into Cullen's eyes finding lust and passion there. She took in a deep breath before saying what he wanted to hear, "yes, Commander." Cullen smiled and increased his hand's speed and pressure on her clit. Ellanora felt like she was going to explode, denying herself what she wanted so desperately, each second seemed to last forever. Cullen watched her in her blissful suffering for a few more moments before kissing her near her ear and whispering, "go, love." She came no more than a second later, hard. Her body was shuddering as the waves of pleasure pulsed through her, like an energy channelling her whole body. Her release by far the most intense she had ever experienced and she immediately credited Cullen for it. She opened her eyes and - still seeing spots - slowly came back to the scene. 

Cullen was grinning at her, clearly happy to have pleased her, and seemingly happy she listened to his direction. He kissed her and released her wrists. Ellanora collected her breath as Cullen lead her toward an empty stable used for hay bale storage. Ellanora was still in shock from her unbelievable orgasm and found her legs weak as she walked. She closed the small gate on the stable behind her and turned to face Cullen. His lips were on hers as soon as she turned and her hands were working on undoing his belt. She could feel his hardness against her thigh while she attempted to set him free of his pants. Cullen was attempting to do the same for Ella when she pushed him away from her, aggressively.

"Take those off." She declared. "..now!" Cullen's eyes grew wide, not expecting that from Ella. He obliged, kicking off his boots and pants to the ground. He was taking off his open shirt when Ellanora pushed him again, forcing him to have a seat in front of her. Ellanora grinned and began to undress, tortuously slow. She watched Cullen take her in, all her curves, studying her body like a map. Once she was completely naked she undid her hair from its side braid, shook it loose and mounted her Commander. Ellanora kissed Cullen deeply and ran her hands through his wet, curly hair while his hands found her lower back and slid to her ass. Her hands explored his body and she soon found his hard cock in her hands. She stroked him gently, watching him close his eyes and hum softly in reaction. She increased her speed for a few moments before guiding him to her entrance and slowly lowering herself onto him. They both shared a sigh of ecstasy while she welcomed him inside of her. She took him deeply and paused to enjoy that feeling. 

She rested her hands on his shoulders as she began her slow, passionate rhythm. Cullen had his head thrown back, enjoying the sensation, his hands exploring Ella's body, from her back to her breasts and back. Ellanora picked up her pace, convinced she could bring herself to another orgasm this way, in addition to bringing Cullen to the brink. Cullen drew his face to hers and they shared hot, long drawn kisses while Ella rode Cullen, hard and fast. She lifted her hips high, almost letting him escape her, and then took him as deep as she could, again and again, she knew Cullen was close to his own release. Ellanora knew she would only last a little while longer, but decided to have her own fun this time. Cullen kissed her with fervor, his brow beginning to furrow. Ellanora turned to his cheek and whispered "not till I say, yes?" Cullen immediately laughed and nodded, agreeing. "Yes?" Ellanora barked. "Yes.." Cullen retorted. Ellanora smiled from ear to ear as Cullen kissed her neck. "Yes what?" Cullen stopped kissing her neck and looked at the woman before him, ravishing him with her body and looking at him with one brow raised, it was incredibly sexy. He smiled and rose his hand to her cheek, caressing it. "Yes.. Inquisitor." Ellanora laughed and kissed him, both her hands on his shoulders. 

She increased her speed, increasing the tension they both were building. Cullen placed his hands on her hips and increased her speed even more, and she let him take her weight and the control into his hands. Ellanora would only be able to withstand this for a few more throws and she knew Cullen would be right behind her. She felt the familiar build up and she crashed into her climax suddenly and beautifully. As she came she managed to sputter, "now.. Go, go, go..." Before moaning loudly into Cullen's shoulder. Cullen lifted her and threw her into him once more before his orgasm came. He gripped her hips tight in his massive palms and his breath hitched. He groaned as he came, like he had been waiting ages to get there. It was a guttural, primal sound and Ellanora loved it. The two of them remained, panting, holding each other for a few moments. Cullen kissed Ellanora's shoulder and neck lightly. The sensation tickled her and she twitched in reaction. 

Ellanora lifted her head from his shoulder to face him. "That was amazing.. I certainly don't want to leave here, or you ever again." Cullen smiled, "that was all you, love." He kissed her on the cheek while she sighed and wiped her brow. "Speaking of," Cullen looked around the stables, "you should be leaving for the Western Approach soon." Ellanora laughed and reality came seeping back into her scene. "Yes, I suppose you're right. I should get ready for travel." Ellanora sat up slowly, and began to dress. Cullen looked at her with a confused look on his face. "Ella, you'll have to do more than that..." Ella stopped dressing and looked at Cullen as his face got serious. "That is, you'll have to wake up first."

 

Opening her eyes, Ella found herself in her chambers. A dying light at her desk, barely lighting the room. Pouring rain outside and a door left ajar, letting the cold seep into her room. She heard the door to her chambers open at the base of the stairs and soon saw the half lit face of Valerie, with a tray of tea and breakfast before her journey set off. Valerie set down the tray and rushed to close the door. "Good morning, Inquisitor. The wind must've opened the door - tea will warm you up. It's a rainin' mess out there." Noting Ellanora's despondent expression, she asked "is there anything wrong, Inquisitor?" Ellanora threw her blankets to the side and got out of the cold bed, her bare feet shocked by the cold wooden floors. She walked to her closet and muttered begrudgingly, "everything is just peachy" before getting dressed for her day.


	44. Angel of the Morning

Ellanora approached the stables. Carrying her pack and letting the rain drench her. She didn't care at all, not after her rude awakening. Something she wanted so desperately to be just a dream. She stomped her feet through the mud and approached her horse, a chestnut Ferelden mare. Cassandra was already attaching her pack to her own horse and Ellanora began to do the same. Solas was sitting by the fire, warming his hands. Blackwall sat near him, lacing his boots whilst humming a sweet tune. The group carried on like this for a few minutes, enjoying the warmth of the fire and the comfort of shelter. They all knew it would be a few days before experiencing such luxuries. Noting a body rushing from the kitchen stairs to the stables in the rain, Ella turned to face them. The figure stepped into the light from the fire and a smile grew on Ella's face. "Erik, what are you doing here?" Erik held a silver teapot and a stack of mugs in his hands. "I came to see you off - and brought you tea." Cassandra grinned and approached Erik. He offered her a mug and poured tea for her. She nodded her thanks and sat by the fire. Ellanora knew everyone in her party - with the exception of Blackwall, detested travelling this early in the morning. 

The group sat around the fire and enjoyed their tea and the company. "I forgot to mention, I will be sticking around Skyhold indefinitely. I am retiring my post at the University and will be serving the Inquisition in counsel of history, magical instruments and research. So, it seems you will not be rid of me as soon as you may have hoped."

"Oh, Erik! That's wonderful news!" Ella embraced her brother in a loving hug; she was pleased her brother was sticking around in addition to know him a valuable asset to the Inquisition.

Hearing footsteps in the mud, they all turned their attention to the entrance of the stables. "Cullen - what are you doing here?" remarked Cassandra, surprised. 

Cullen stood before the group, his hair damp from the rain. No armour, but still donning his black fur cape over a beige tunic. He looked just as surprised as the group staring back at him while he tried to form words, "I - uh.. that is.."

Erik, to his rescue, stood up and walked toward the man. He patted him on the arm before declaring, "The commander has some last minute counsel before you lot ride into the cold and rainy abyss. Let's check the horses are set, guys." And with that comment, Cullen gained his composure and confidence once more. "Ah, yes. Inquisitor, if you'd indulge me." The rest of the group moved on to check the horses and draw them from their stalls, while Ella walked toward Cullen without a word. She had no idea how to speak to him after this morning's dream - especially standing in the stables, the scene of the... well. As she walked toward him she noticed how curly his hair had gotten from the rain, and he was holding an item wrapped in parchment in his hands. She cleared her throat hoping to calm the butterflies in her stomach. "Ahem, yes Cull - Commander?" 

Cullen was shifting his weight from one leg to the other, making himself look nervous. "I wanted to um, wish you well on your journey. You are, um.. quite the skilled mage and I am confident you will succeed and return to Skyhold post haste.."

Ellanora found herself grinning from ear to ear. Cullen had never complimented her fighting skills or vigor. He didn't seem too warm to mages, from her standpoint. He was furious when Ellanora had formed an alliance with the mages in Haven. She knew he had some tough experiences at the Ferelden Circle, and was in Kirkwall during it's uproar but to what end, she did not know. All she knew was that right now, she felt his respect and admiration, and she felt amazing. Ella saw his lip turn up and a slight blush cover his cheeks. Ella didn't know what to say - she was speechless. She brought her hands to her sides, grabbing the hem of her armoured long tunic and curtseyed. 

Ellanora immediately turned beet red and apologized. "Andraste's tits, I'm sorry.. I .. I don't know why I did that. Probably a reflex.. I meant to say thank you, I mean.. I ..." Cullen smiled at her and chuckled lightly. Ellanora put her head down and rubbed her forehead with her hand, amazed at her ability to embarrass herself. Just when she thought it couldn't get any worse, Erik yelled out, "Did you seriously just curtsey?" The group behind her laughed and she cast a deadly look to Erik. Cullen, suddenly aware of the group, rambled and rubbed the back of his neck. "Here. It's, um.. something that I .. uh, Dagna ...was working on. She asked me to get it to you.. I .. Maker's breath. I thought you might like it." Cullen thrust the package into Ellanora's hands and straightened his posture. "Have a safe journey to the Western Approach, Inquisitor." Cullen nodded to Ellanora, turned and headed for his office, quickly taking the steps two by two in the rain. Ellanora was curious by his gift and yet still so embarrassed. What was it about that man that made her act so foolish?

She didn't have long to ponder the thought as Erik placed his arm around her shoulder and muttered, "Don't worry, I'm sure he thought that was entirely adorable."

Ella hit her brother in the arm and put the package in her saddlebag. She kissed her brother farewell and mounted her horse, hesitantly. She had gotten more comfortable riding, but she still had her fears. Ella pulled her cowl over her head and the group; Cassandra, Solas, Blackwall and Ella, began their journey to the Western Approach.

Little did Erik know, he was right. Cullen Rutherford - the Commander of the Inquisition, once safe from the rain in his office, did, in fact, find it entirely adorable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!!
> 
> I'm writing this HUGE chapter about the Western Approach and this was supposed to be the start of it but it's been taking me so long to write it that I wanted to give you guys something, I know it's been 2 weeks.. I've genuinely been feeling guilty and sad for not posting. So this was for you. I'll need another few days to put this massive chapter together. I appreciate the patience, I'll be divulging some secrets from Ella's past in this next one that I'm trying to get *just right*. Appreciate comments and knowing you're still there!! :)


	45. Sun and Sand

Ellanora knew she shouldn't complain. She had been begging for warm, sunny days for ages. But the Western Approach was something else. The sun beat down on them and seemingly did not stop. The sand was hot and the dry heat of the desert caused skin to crack and their armour to be more uncomfortable than ever.

Ella and her party were sunburnt. Badly. Ella had given Solas her mage cowl - his head was so sunburnt it had cracked and peeled. This act of generosity caused Ella's hair to lighten and her scalp to itch.

Scout Harding had informed them of Venatori in the area and interrogation revealed the location of a mine. The group set off, trudging through the sand, trying not to let their exhaustion set in - knowing a battle was likely. "This bloody heat! I can hardly think straight... what do we expect to find in this blighted mine?" Blackwall asked, his skin looking rough and dirty from the sand.

"Likely a bunch of Venatori we have to deal with. Although - we need to know what they're upto so if we find this Sevris - we need him alive to question him. Be on your guard."

Ella delivered her speech with zero enthusiasm. She was exhausted, wind had blown sand in her hair, eyes and mouth. Her armour felt twenty times heavier and she found herself leaning her weight on her staff - like a walking stick. They finally arrived at the mine, ready for battle, anticipating anything. The found the mine empty, save a few spiders and hyenas, and a note left behind.

They were out of luck. Whatever was being conducted in this mine had been moved to Emprise Du Lion. Ellanora sighed and considered what to do next. 

The group decided to continue heading South to a known clearing to make camp. Ellanora hoped there would be a water source and perhaps some shade for themselves and their horses. The group encountered a pack of hyenas and they jumped off their horses and gripped their weapons, ready to vanquish the threat. Before long the scene was clear, albeit bloody. 

Finally reaching Nazaire's Pass, they worked tirelessly building their camp, into the evening preparing for the end of a hot day, and the start of a freezing night. At first Ella welcomed the idea of the cold, but slowly she found herself shuffling closer and closer to the fire. "We'll begin a search for water in the morning and get the horses ready for the day." Muttered Ellanora to Blackwall and Cassandra - who both sat near the fire with their arms crossed.

Cassandra took a deep breath and shivered. "I think Harding was right - this very well may be the worst place on earth."

Ellanora asked, "Of all our journeys so far which location has been your favourite?"

Cassandra sat up, mulling over the question momentarily before commenting, "I liked the Storm Coast." Ellanora threw a blasphemous look at Cassandra and she continued before Ella could interject. "Yes, it was gloomy and rainy. The water was beautiful and the rain made it kind of romantic." Blackwall and Ellanora laughed for a while, wiping tears from their eyes before Cassandra laughed lightly too and barked, "Oh shutup, you two. What's yours then, Blackwall?"

Blackwall sighed his laughter away and said, almost remorsefully, "I liked being in the Hinterlands." Ella and Cassandra nodded in his direction, not pressing him to continue. A grin slowly spread across his usually brooding face.

"Remember after we met - the ridiculous bear attack?" Blackwall chuckled and leaned back in his seat, pointing his conversation at Ella.

"You mean the day of 4 bears? How could I forget?" Ellanora smiled at Blackwall, egging him on to elaborate.

"Still couldn't believe my eyes - this tiny blonde magelet spinning her staff over her head, taking on 4 bears at once behind the group while we caught up to you. I thought for sure you were next to meet the Maker."

"Hey - I resent that! I may be tiny but I'm..."

"-Ferocious." Cassandra said quietly, as if in her own thoughts. Cassandra blushed and Blackwall laughed.

"Well, I'll take it, thank you. Let that be the last time you underestimate me." Ella raised her hand and pointed at Blackwall, administering her threat.

Blackwall threw some twigs into the fire before stating, "First and last time - I promise."

Since their conversation at the Exalted Plains, Ella found her relationship with Blackwall to be strictly professional, but tonight she was so pleased to find him more receptive to a friendship. Ellanora smiled, it was refreshing to find her friend again on the other side of the fire. From beyond the fire Ella saw Solas approaching from hidden view rubbing something on his head. "Where have you been, Solas? Making a poultice for your sunburn?" Asked Ellanora, and everyone's attention turned to the mage. 

"There's a man just down the hill. A researcher from Orlais here studying dragons. Fascinating man. He offered me a remedy of his. He's also searching for some supplies for his research. Likely a complete waste of time, but we should speak with him tomorrow." Solas sat down and passed the jar to Cassandra, who nodded her thanks and applied it to her red, peeling nose before passing it to Blackwall.

Ella sighed and quietly said, "Alright. That's it for me." before heading to her tent for the night. Lifting the flap to her tent, Cassandra called out to her. "You never told us your favourite place so far!" Ella turned, looking over the faces of her friends.. "It was Haven, for a time." She noticed her friends drop their heads at her words. They spent a moment in silence before she spoke again, "Now, I believe it's Skyhold. It's.. home. Goodnight." Ella smiled at her comrades and ducked into her tent, ready and welcoming sleep. 

She removed her armour and laid down on her cot, wrapping the blankets around her. She took a deep breath in before releasing it. Ellanora made a mental checklist of the days ahead before suddenly sitting up. His gift! She realized in her days of travel she hadn't opened the gift Cullen gave her. 

She unwrapped the parchment and found a book, a journal facing her. The pages felt as if they were thicker than regular paper, perhaps coated with something. The journal hummed of some sort of magic or enchantment. She opened the front page to find Cullen's writing.

_Ellanora,_

_For days you find yourself in rain._

_-Cullen._  


She laughed, beaming. She hugged the journal to her chest. This man just keeps giving. First bringing her brother to Skyhold, now this. She flung back onto her bed and sighed. She fell asleep that night still clutching the journal and a smile on her face. 

She woke early after a rough sleep. She had tossed and turned and shivered throughout the night. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and opened to a page in her journal and grabbed some ink and a quill. She pondered for a moment how to thank him, what to say. 

_Cullen,_

_Thank you for the journal, I love it! I'm guessing Dagna played a hand in the enchantment to waterproof the pages? Very functional for me based on the wretched dreary places you send me off to. This helps me forgive you for that._ _It's very lovely, you are too kind._ _How are you feeling? I'd love to have dinner with you upon my return. Catch up and perhaps have that training exercise---_

"Inquisitor!" Cassandra entered her tent unexpectedly and Ella promptly dropped her ink well onto her lap, spilling it's contents. "I'm sorry - but there is a group of varghests getting quite close to our camp. We're heading out shortly." Cassandra left her tent and Ellanora quickly dressed and grabbed her staff, exhaling loudly before leaving her tent.

They leapt into battle, Solas and Ella attacking from afar, freezing the creatures in place while Cassandra and Blackwall cut them down, one by one. Ellanora spent the rest of the morning speaking with Frederic and searching for a water source for their horses and their flasks - to no avail. Cassandra suggested taking the horses back to Lost Spring Canyon where the horses can rest and be ready for their treck back to Skyhold. Risking the horses lives to dehydration and exposure just wasn't worth the convenience.

Ellanora agreed and they began their treck to Lost Spring Canyon, walking their horses so's not to tire them out. They wandered through sand-storms and local wild-life encounters but eventually arrived in the afternoon to base camp, informing Scout Harding of their reason for arrival. "Certainly a good idea, Inquisitor. If you have some time this afternoon you could always train a Bronto to take you around the desert." Ellanora laughed and refilled her water canteen and her potions. She quickly pulled out her journal as the team gathered to leave. She scribbled the remainder of her letter to Cullen and handed it to her requisitions officer, Rena, to be sent.  

The group then began their treck to the Tevinter Ruins to meet Hawke and Stroud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't updated in a while but I got some pretty big news that I'd love to share with you...
> 
> I've spent the last few weeks applying and waiting and I just got word --I've been accepted into a university program for GAME WRITING! Heehehehe I'm going to learn all about writing storylines for videogames and developing storyboards.. I start in September so I'll still have plenty of time to update this fanfic.. This fanfic and the response I've gotten from it's readers has really inspired me to follow my dreams so I thank you for that and I assure you this story will continue to be updated. Thanks so much for the support, guys. I am so, so excited.


	46. An Undying Friendship

On their route to the Tevinter ruins the heat soon took most of them. Blackwall's eyes were heavy and his breath labored as they walked in the dense sand and grueling heat. He felt his forehead - a fever. He felt groggy and delirious, but he pushed himself onward. And then he saw it. A shadow of a man in the distance, hair blowing from the wind, all too familiar in stature. As the group moved on, this figure became clearer to him. It couldn't be. It literally could not be. Blackwall knew he was dead, he'd seen it. It had been so because of him. He closed his eyes and shook his head, but upon opening them there the image of the man stood, unwavering. His eyes bore into him, all knowing. The man who representing so much, so much respect and so much guilt. Before him amongst the sandstorm ahead, stood Grey Warden Blackwall. 

He knew he must be going crazy, and didn't realize how bad it was until he heard Ellanora beside him. "Blackwall - are you okay?? Hey! Answer me! ..are you alright?" Hearing her words finally shocked him back into reality and he locked eyes with Ellanora. Her eyes pleading, searching his face for an answer, her hands holding his against his armoured chest plate. Blackwall cleared his throat and replied, "Ah, yes... was just lost in thought perhaps. My apologies.." Ella put her hands on her hips and raised a concerned eyebrow. "You just stopped dead in your tracks staring off, didn't seem to hear us talking to you.. are you sure you're alright?"

Blackwall nodded his head and reached for his flask of water. "I believe it to just be the heat, Inquisitor." He said and proceeded to drain his flask in it's entirety. When he finished Ellanora offered her full flask of water and took his empty one. Blackwall looked at her to protest but she raised her hand as if to tell him not to bother arguing. "Stay hydrated, Blackwall. I need you at your best. If you need us to stop, say so. Okay?" Blackwall looked at Ellanora. This majestic unwavering woman who's shoulders hosted the world and it's future. He nodded quickly and turned back toward their course, hoping to prevent Ella from seeing the adoration in his eyes. He still dreamt of her as his, but he knew he should count himself lucky even just to call her a friend. He knew this. But it did not stop the feelings, no matter how hard he tried. Similar to his guilt and shame, he suppressed his feelings for the one woman who made him feel even slightly worthy of a real shot at life.

He sighed that glimmer of hope away knowing her heart was set on another. He knew it was Cullen she had eyes for. It was fairly obvious, the way the two of them looked at each other, smiled in one another's direction. As much as it tore him up inside thinking of them together, he really just wanted her to be happy. And if that meant Cullen, then so be it. He knew he would continue to protect her, fiercely - from battle and from love woes. He vowed that if Cullen, or anyone did anything to hurt her they would soon know his wrath. He noticed suddenly his hand had formed a fist and was pulsing in anger. He released a breath he hadn't realized he was holding in, and released his grip. He continued to walk toward their destination and decided to take healthy, long deep breaths to maintain his focus. It helped and before long they had arrived at the Tevinter ruins and stood before Hawke and Warden Stroud.

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Ellanora sighed a breath of relief seeing Hawke and Stroud at the entrance to the ruins. That relief was short-lived.

"I'm glad you made it, Inquisitor. I fear they've already started the ritual." Ellanora looked from Stroud to Hawke with fear in her eyes, her brow furrowed. "It has to be blood-magic. I hope we can stop it before more people get hurt. You take point, I'll guard your backs." Ellanora looked at her party, they all gripped their weapons and prepared for anything. Ella gave Blackwall an extra look, he confirmed what she was thinking with a simple nod of his head.

The group then witnessed the terrifying malice that was Corepheyus' plan. He had funded his demon army with Grey Wardens. The future Dorian and Ella stumbled into was being seen from the beginning, it's origin. Ellanora always thought the unknown was scary, but knowing the conclusion in this instance was truly terrifying.

They soon learned of the details which convinced Clarel to offer up the Grey Wardens on a silver platter. Erimond explained the calling, the Wardens gathering together.. They believed they were to fight darkspawn. They believed their sacrifice to be worthy of their fallen comrades'. Clearly Warden Commander Clarel had been fooled - there's no way Grey Wardens would willingly do this If they had known the plan. Ellanora's head was spinning, thinking about everything she'd just learned. Blackwall and Stroud were outraged, she could tell. 

"Release the Grey Wardens and surrender. I won't ask twice." Ellanora declared, loud and strong. Erimond replied, "No, you won't." Before she knew it an awful pain ran through her hand, pulling the anchor. The anchor was so imbedded into her that it felt like Erimond was trying to rip her arm right out of it's socket. Dropping to her knees, trying to manage the pain, she noted Blackwall trying to step infront of her, as if it were an ambiguous cast and not meant specifically, entirely for her. His attempts to shield her were futile. She looked at Blackwall and similar to how he had, she nodded her head to indicate she was fine. She felt the power in Erimond's cast but she felt her own power to be overwhelming. She focused and cast a crippling blow to Erimond - much to his surprise. 

The group then fought off the remaining demons that Erimond ordered into battle. Blackwall fought furiously. 'A little too close to home' Ellanora thought to herself. She kept her eye on him, making sure his anger wasn't compromising his skills in battle or clouding his vision. Fortunately, it did not although once the battle had concluded she noted that Blackwall just looked very, very sad. They spoke for some time about the Warden's intentions and the consequences laid before them. 

"The Warden and I will scout out Adamant and confirm that the other Wardens are there. We'll meet you back at Skyhold." Hawke said and the two headed out. Ellanora wiped the blood from her brow and leaned against the wall, taking in deep breaths. Her arm still pulsed with pain, slowly fading but still shocking. Blackwall was pacing the ruins. Cassandra positioned herself beside Ellanora, wiped her sword clean in slow, labored motions. Solas stood, staring towards where Stroud indicated Adamant was. Likely forming his own thoughts about what just happened. 

The group stayed there for some time. Ellanora eventually lead the way to the entrance of the ruins. She pulled off to the side momentarily and let Cassandra and Solas pass in front of her. Blackwall was passing her as she rested her hand and his shoulder and walked with him. Silently, for some time they walked like that. Nor Cassandra or Solas saying a word on the entire venture back to camp. They headed for Nazaire's Pass as the sun continued to beat down upon them. Causing the blood on their armor and flesh to dry and stain. A permanent memory of this day. Upon reaching camp they headed to their tents, respectively. Ellanora brought a blanket from her tent and laid out near the fire. She stayed up watching the stars. After a few minutes, Blackwall emerged from his tent. The two of them laid on either side of the fire, admiring the sky's canvas. Their presence saying exactly what needed to be said, without saying anything at all. Support, understanding, empathy. They would begin their long venture back to Skyhold in the morning. Soon before long, they drifting into sleep and nothing was heard but the crackling of embers and the heckle of far-off hyenas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Missed you guys! Started a new job and prepping for Uni courses coming soon. Hope you enjoy this chapter!
> 
> I've got another one written just need to edit it.. Should be up soon.  
> Enjoy!


	47. Meanwhile, In Skyhold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dorian's POV

Dorian was ready for Ellanora to return. As much as he was enjoying his time with The Iron Bull without immediate threat of battle, he missed staying up late in the library with a bottle (or two) of wine and a stack of books with her. He would make fun of Ellanora's love of whimsical folk lore, yet he loved reading them to her. The look of wonderment on her face when he did a dramatic reading of a story of fairies or of love in a time of peril; he could never forget it. His days now were spent often exchanging stories with Erik, who was fascinated by Tevinter magic and history, or, like today - playing chess with Cullen.

Occasionally Cole would sit nearby and watch. He considered it a willpower exercise not to reveal the player's weaknesses or strategy, despite not knowing how to play the game. Dorian had once tried to teach Cole how to play but found Cole made stories and personalities for each of the pawns and decided him a better spectator. Dorian and Cullen had early on, refused to play with Sera or The Iron Bull. Mainly due to Sera making up her own rules to the game and from The Iron Bull breaking a board in response to his defeat. It seems everyone felt the effect of Ella being gone, The Western Approach, had been her longest venture to date. Ellanora had been gone for over a month. Dorian could tell Cullen was getting more and more agitated as days went by. Dorian knew Cullen and Ellanora typically corresponded just as much as Ella and himself did; Dorian had seen the letters hidden in Ella's desk drawer. Even Dorian wondered why during this venture Ellanora hadn't written much. He had only received one letter promising a wine-and-reading night upon her return, and he knew Sera had sent her a few 'drawings' and Ella had only returned one. Ella and Sera had a ridiculous correspondence game where, one would write a missive with instructions for a drawing and the other would send it so. Sera pinned her favourites to her wall in her room above the Tavern and would reminisce giddily at the dirty things the two of them would conjure when pen met parchment.

Today, Cullen sat before Dorian, losing this particular game and seemingly upset about it. Cullen moved his knight to an obvious vulnerable position. Dorian figured this was the perfect time to inquire. "Now, I'm assuming you didn't much like that knight, then. I'll just get that out of your way." Cullen furrowed his brow, somehow in disbelief of Dorian's move. "Now, now Commander.. I'm sure she'll be home soon."

Cullen looked up from the board. "Excuse me?" Dorian laughed and waved his hand infront of himself, "Oh please, you look like a mabari waiting for it's treat. Impatient and distracted. I am sure she'll be home soon." Cullen rolled his eyes and straightened his posture before capturing Dorian's bishop. Dorian saw Erik climbing the steps to the gazebo as Erik declared, "About a week. She finally wrote me back." Erik pulled up a chair beside the pair and laughed at Cullen's over eager attention all-of-a-sudden. Erik held the letter in question in his hand and read a portion of it aloud.

_"---We should arrive back in Skyhold in a week's time. It really depends on how our horses handle this heat during the journey. I should be home in time for our nameday, which is exciting. This will be the first we'll be able to celebrate together in years!--"_

Dorian laughed to himself, before collecting his composure. "You know what this means, don't you?" Cullen and Erik looked perplexed which caused Dorian to laugh even more. "haha - oh boys.. this means we'll have to have a party!" Dorian stood up from his seat and walked away from Erik and Cullen. Cullen called out, "It's your turn! Forfeiting the game?" Dorian turned his head to face Cullen as he continued to walk away. "Queen to C7. Checkmate."

Cullen studied the board and found himself reluctantly smiling at Dorian's move. He shook his head in disbelief and prepped the board for a new game as Erik shifted from his seat to the one Dorian previously inhabited. The sat in silence, both with grins on their faces wondering what Dorian was going to get upto.

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"There should be a ball. We should have nobles come, it's last minute but we can spin it as a surprise party. We can have dresses made and she can just pick one when she arrives. This would be a wonderful opportu-"

Dorian raised his hand in a "stop" motion in front of Vivienne and Josephine. He had gathered them together at Vivienne's balcony to discuss his plans. "No." Josephine walked around the table to argue, "You cannot be serious, this is a truly great opportunity to showcase Skyhold and the Inquisitio--" Dorian crossed his arms to his chest. "No. I will not allow it." Vivienne and Josephine both scoffed and prepared to launch into round three. Dorian stopped them before they were able to form the words.

"Maybe next year you can have this pompous, elaborate decadent party that I will love and Ellanora will hate. You can dress her up like a doll and introduce her to people she will loathe and contemplate killing just to be away from. But this year, we are doing the opposite. We are kicking the nobles out of Skyhold and giving Ellanora a party she will appreciate. In the afternoon, dueling and horse racing in our Inquisitor's honor. Commander Cullen will be helping me facilitate this." Vivienne sighed and rolled her eyes. "I saw that, Viv. In the evening we will have a dinner in the great hall and I will allow the two of you to decorate and cater - but you must do so with what Ellanora will like. And finally a giant party at the Tavern. I plan on getting her so drunk she forgets how old she's gotten. These are my terms. So, what do you say?"

"One condition." Vivienne said as she walked toward Dorian, with her height she still towered over him. "We get to dress her." Dorian rose his right hand to his mustache and twisted it in his fingertips. "I cannot agree to that. Only Ellanora can. But, I cannot prevent you, nor your saint-of-a-tailor from creating something beautiful. If Ellanora likes it, I'm sure she will indulge you two." Vivienne and Josephine looked at each other and smiled. "That's fine. That's just fine dear boy. We shall get to planning immediately." Vivienne picked up the bottle of wine from the table and poured two glasses before her, beaming. Josephine walked toward the balcony, overlooking the Tower's hall and sighed. "Just think of the tapestry."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's a short one, butttttttttt the next one will be huge - was going to divide it into a couple chapters but I think with all the drama you'll kill me if I keep you waiting and separate it. 
> 
> Was hoping to time out the piece to be complete and posted on my own birthday (the 9th) but I got so many more ideas to make it even better and more dramatic that I revised. You guys deserve the best! The big one should be up Wednesday. Thanks guys!


	48. For Special Occasions Only

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cute little Dorian - Ella time.

A lot of planning had taken place in the week leading up to Ellanora's arrival home. Unbeknownst to Ella. Ella walked into the Skyhold gates exhausted and happy to be home. She found the courtyard not nearly as occupied as usual, and the bell declaring their arrival hadn't sounded. She summed it up to her own lack of correspondence this trip, not informing her advisors of her exact arrival. She felt a tinge of guilt pass through her when reminded of her poor correspondence during her trip. She just felt so involved in everything that occurred. Normally she would be involved in a situation and report home for perspective, but this trip she felt very sure of herself and sure of the course she, and her advisors had formed. She was less trepidatious this time and felt she needn't report with questions or confirmations of her own thoughts. This trip was also very personal. She sensed from Warden Stroud, and Hawke and Blackwall, the importance and heavy disappointment that occurred at the Tevinter ruins. She felt incapable of putting it into words at the time. Ellanora rode into Skyhold, anticipating an earful at her war meeting but also looking forward to informing her advisors about what took place on that faithful day in the middle of the desert.

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Cullen's heart skipped a beat when Ellanora walked into the war room. He was caught off guard - Leliana and Josephine as well. Cullen made a mental note to reprimand the soldier who was stationed at the bell - the three advisors had no idea Ellanora had returned. Ellanora stood in the doorway, smiling shyly at them. Cullen took in the sight of her. She was wearing black boots and black leggings, and a beige armoured tunic. The light colour of the tunic made her tanned skin appear even darker, more of a contrast. Ellanora had her hair messily thrown into a side braid, and more freckles donned her face than before. Her blue eyes were piercing against her complexion. 

Josephine broke the silence and rushed to Ellanora, throwing her arms around her in an embrace. "Inquisitor! You've returned! What a surprise!" Ellanora returned the hug and when she stepped away she gently said, "A good surprise, I hope.." Leliana laughed and strode toward Ellanora. "Of course, of course. We just didn't know when you would get back. Not a great deal of correspondence, Inquisitor." Leliana wagged her index finger at her, accusingly before embracing her, welcoming her home.

Cullen shifted in his place on the other side of the table. He cleared his throat and captured Ella's attention. "Welcome back, Ellanora. I'm sure everyone will be happy to see your safe return." Ellanora smiled and Leliana and Josephine lead her toward to war table. "Yes, Inquisitor. You have certainly been missed lately." Leliana stated subtly with a grin on her lips. Cullen could feel his face blushing slightly, and decided to try to turn the conversation back to business. "Inquisitor, is now a good time for you to discuss The Western Approach with us? Do you require some rest from your travels first?" 

Ellanora seemed surprised by Cullen's question. She smiled, before declaring, "No, that's quite alright, thank you. I'd like to share it with you now... perhaps you all should have a seat..." Ellanora went on to discuss everything they had encountered in the Western Approach. The Tevinter ruins, Erimond, the Elder One's plan. The group made plans for looking into the old Grey Warden fortress and reaching out to other Grey Wardens, to try to gain some intel as to how far this corruption was rooted. They spoke for a few hours before Ellanora began to yawn and rub at her eyes. As Ellanora spoke of her journey she absent-mindedly pulled her hair out of it's messy braid and let it down, wild as it was. Cullen noticed how long her hair had gotten since she was last home, since he last saw it down. He hadn't seen her in over a month and he found himself dumfounded that she looked even better than he remembered. As they wrapped up their conversation, Josephine commented on Ella's hair.

"Your hair has grown quite long, Inquisitor. I like it down." Ellanora laughed. "I suppose it has grown. It's been quite the hassle in the desert, just so messy. I can't wait to take a bath in my quarters, wash away the sand and dirt from our travels." Josephine began to ask Ellanora about the conditions of her travel, and the weather in the Western Approach. Cullen found it impossible to focus on the words they shared. He was experiencing flashes of images, of fantasy. Images of Ellanora in her quarters, lowering her body into her bath tub. The bath tub filled with aromatic oils and bubble elixir. He envisioned her submerging her head into the water, soaking her long tresses before emerging again. Flashes of skin peeking out from the surface of bubbles, enticing him. These flashes came every few seconds, demanding his attention. Cullen could feel his blood stiring, his focus waning. Between his consumed thoughts and knowing she stood so close to her, he wanted her so badly in that moment. Cullen knew he needed to leave her presence to maintain his composure. 

"Well, if that's all... I have a lot of work to do with this new information. If you'll excuse me, ladies." Cullen began to collect his things when Leliana spoke, "Ah, yes, why don't you head off and relax then Inquisitor? I think we've kept you from your bath tub long enough." Ellanora nodded to agree. "Yes, thanks.. I suppose we'll speak tomorrow, then?" Noting everyone's nod of approval, Ella turned and wished her advisors goodnight before leaving the room and heading to her quarters.

Cullen waited a few moments, pretending to gather his items to insure he wouldn't encounter Ella in the hallway. Shortly, he took his documents and strode out of the war room, leaving the two snickering advisors behind him, on his way back to his office. He would spend the rest of the night working, trying to get those teasing images out of his mind. Trying, but not succeeding.  
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Ellanora soaked in the hot water far too long. Her fingers had become wrinkled and the water had began to cool. She hadn't even begun to wash her hair, she was too engulfed with just enjoying the simple luxuries again. The oils Josephine had sent for from Orlais, the bubble bath elixir Dagna made. The room soon smelt like lavender, vanilla and cedarwood. She took a long breath in through her nose, letting the aromas relax her. She heard the door to her quarters open and the steps being taken two by two. She wondered who would be visiting this late and sat up in the tub, ready to jump out and find out. 

Dorian suddenly burst through the bathroom door, a wondrous smile on his face. "Darling! You've returned - fabulous!" Ellanora covered herself instinctively and then relaxed into the bubbles, realizing it was Dorian. He approached the tub and kissed her on the head. She sat up in the tub and smiled at him, "Why hello Dorian. Just couldn't wait to see me, I see?" Dorian laughed and pulled up a chair and positioned it behind her. He went to her shelf and pulled some of the fancy hair wash Vivienne had given her and dubbed 'for special occasions only.' Dorian brought the jar to his seat and waited for Ellanora to dunk her hair in the water before sitting up again and giving him access to it. Dorian leaned toward the tub and took Ellanora's hair in his hands, applying the hair wash. "And how was the Western Approach, hmm?" Ellanora closed her eyes and relaxed into Dorian's hands massaging the product into her scalp. "Oh you know, the usual. Unbearable weather, never-ending days, things trying to kill me... Hey isn't this the stuff Viv said 'for special occasions only' Dorian?" Dorian laughed at Ella's Vivienne impression and scoffed. "Well, my dear, it is a special occasion. Tomorrow is your nameday! We have a few things planned for you." Ellanora snapped alert, "We? Please don't tell me Viv and Josie are throwing a ball!!" Dorian pet her head gently to reassure her. "As much as I'd love to see you wrapped in crinoline, no, we've something better. You'll see."

Ellanora sighed but decided to trust Dorian. After he finished washing her hair, he slipped out to the cellar to fetch a bottle of wine, and met Ella again in her quarters. They enjoyed the bottle together, discussing everything about the Western Approach and about what had been happening in Skyhold lately. It wasn't long before the wine lulled them both into sleep. Ella on her couch, and Dorian in the chair opposite. Ellanora was happy to be home, and Dorian was happy to have her.


End file.
